(form the forums)

Thanks, everyone, for all your advice and thoughts.

My plan right now is to run the Potomac River Marathon in early May and break 4 hours (or at least finish ) so I can get the DNF off my back. I'm doing Hal Higdon's Intermediate II because I can't mentally face Pfitz right now.

I've been toying with the idea of doing 10Ks, 10 milers, and half marys for the rest of this year and next year -- taking a break from the marathon (and hearing many of you suggest it sort of confirms it for me). I work full time, I have a toddler and a husband and friends I try to see occassionally. It's a really full life and I love all of it but it's hard to fit in marathon mileage right now. Just doing Higdon for a couple weeks has allowed me more time with the IBT (that's Iron Baby Toddler ) and I've really enjoyed being able to hang out with him and not stress about getting in a midweek 12 mile run after he goes to bed.

As my husband likes to remind me, I don't need to cross everything off of my life "to do" list before I turn 30. Boston will be there in 5, 10 years. This is a hobby and it's supposed to be fun. Once it gets stressful and sucky it's time to re evaluate. I don't need to do marathons to "prove" myself as an athlete. I have an Ironman tattoo for that

I would love to get a coach but it's not financially in the cards right now (new house, new car, daycare). Maybe when the IBT starts public school!

Instead of Steamtown I may do the Hershey Half and take the family to the Sweetest Place on Earth and let IBT inhale all the chocolate his little heart desires

Thank you all again. This is really a great place.

I emailed James my post and this was his response:

I’m very happy for you and your decision sweetie.  I have always been so proud of your accomplishments, which is why I push you to appreciate them more.  We are definitely very blessed with a wonderful son, family and friends.  It is definitely OK to make the choice to enjoy them.  That being said, whenever it does feel right again, I know you will BQ or any other goal you set your mind on.  Just like you have to listen to your body on the course, you have to listen to your heart off of it.  If it doesn’t feel right, you’ll only make it worse by forcing it.

I am totally down with your plan to Hershey as well, but I don’t see why H should be the only one given cart blanche on inhaling chocolate!

I love you so much and you will always have the support of H and I (and maybe one more, just saying).

Your Loving Husband

Despite a decent 20 miler yesterday I'm feeling discouraged. I train pretty hard and I'm feeling so it's-not-fair when I hear people BQ at their first marathon (thinking they might run a 4:30 and then run a 3:30) or run so much faster than me with so much less training. I know that I'm lucky to have the body and the time and the disposable income to train and race, but I hate that I'm so slow and I work so hard.

Blarg