worst bike ride ever (does not include falling off)

Yesterday I  went for my normal Friday morning ride( I have my own business and Friday morning is bike time) Unknown to me, I had a companion, an Irish chap named Murphy and boy was he busy. Firstly I am still warming up when a truck (braindead driver) goes past me at the speed of light, and just a layer of paint between us.  Front wheel in a pothole and I am easting dirt, but no harm to me or the bike so I just get back on and continue. Then my cleat goes loose, so stop and tighten that lot. Can you see the theme starting to take shape here?

10 min later life is sweet on the spokes are singing when I hit my favorite downhill when the new aerobottle on the tribars starts barfing sugary water over me as I hit the smallest bump in the road.
Get to the bottom of my hill, stop, pour out half the water and continue, then about 10k further, the cleat goes loose again. Stop tighten again, this time doing such a good job that the thread in the shoe strips.

By now this has ceased to by a training ride and is now a point of honor between me and Murphy
So I push on, get to my destination and the ride home starts, about the same time the light tail wind that I had stops, turns and is now a rapidly increasing headwind.
Did I mention that one of the farmers along the road has just plowed his lands? The dust makes a very nice coating on a sugar water base.

Got home, had a shower, logged the ride. Hopefully I had my turn with Murphy for the rest of the year.