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2008-02-20 1:50 PM

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Champion
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Richmond, VA
Subject: A funny poem I remember from chidhood

Early on morning; In the middle of the night

Two dead boys; Got up to Fight

Back to back; They faced each other

Drew their swords; and shot each other

A deaf policeman heard the noise

and came and killed the two dead boys.



2008-02-20 1:51 PM
in reply to: #1223986

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Melon Presser
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Subject: RE: A funny poem I remember from chidhood

This makes perfect sense to me.

What's this genre called, is it like slant rhyme or something like that? There's a term for it.

2008-02-20 1:52 PM
in reply to: #1223986

Subject: RE: A funny poem I remember from chidhood
condorman - 2008-02-20 2:50 PM

Early on morning; In the middle of the night

Two dead boys; Got up to Fight

Back to back; They faced each other

Drew their swords; and shot each other

A deaf policeman heard the noise

and came and killed the two dead boys.

I remember this one too I think my mom knew it from when she was little.

2008-02-20 2:00 PM
in reply to: #1223986

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Master
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West Jordan, UT
Subject: RE: A funny poem I remember from chidhood
condorman - 2008-02-20 12:50 PM

Early on morning; In the middle of the night

Two dead boys; Got up to Fight

Back to back; They faced each other

Drew their swords; and shot each other

A deaf policeman heard the noise

and came and killed the two dead boys.

You forgot the last line:

"If you don't beleive this lie is true, ask the blind man, he saw it too."

I also think the first line went:

"One fine day in the middle of the night..."

 



Edited by tkbslc 2008-02-20 2:01 PM
2008-02-20 2:04 PM
in reply to: #1223986

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Champion
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Richmond, VA
Subject: RE: A funny poem I remember from chidhood
...I see, said the blind man as he picked up his hammer and saw...
2008-02-20 2:15 PM
in reply to: #1224039

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Champion
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Subject: RE: A funny poem I remember from chidhood

condorman - 2008-02-20 2:04 PM ...I see, said the blind man as he picked up his hammer and saw...

Beat me to it.  Only other person I've ever known to know that line. 



2008-02-20 2:17 PM
in reply to: #1224074

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Master
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West Jordan, UT
Subject: RE: A funny poem I remember from chidhood
crowny2 - 2008-02-20 1:15 PM

condorman - 2008-02-20 2:04 PM ...I see, said the blind man as he picked up his hammer and saw...

Beat me to it.  Only other person I've ever known to know that line. 

Maybe cause it is a lame line....

2008-02-20 2:20 PM
in reply to: #1223986

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Champion
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Richmond, VA
Subject: RE: A funny poem I remember from chidhood
I've told you a million times not to excaggerate.
2008-02-20 2:24 PM
in reply to: #1224077

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Champion
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Southern Chicago Suburbs, IL
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Subject: RE: A funny poem I remember from chidhood
tkbslc - 2008-02-20 2:17 PM
crowny2 - 2008-02-20 1:15 PM

condorman - 2008-02-20 2:04 PM ...I see, said the blind man as he picked up his hammer and saw...

Beat me to it.  Only other person I've ever known to know that line. 

Maybe cause it is a lame line....

:P

2008-02-20 2:37 PM
in reply to: #1224097

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Champion
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Richmond, VA
Subject: RE: A funny poem I remember from chidhood
crowny2 - 2008-02-20 3:24 PM
tkbslc - 2008-02-20 2:17 PM
crowny2 - 2008-02-20 1:15 PM

condorman - 2008-02-20 2:04 PM ...I see, said the blind man as he picked up his hammer and saw...

Beat me to it.  Only other person I've ever known to know that line. 

Maybe cause it is a lame line....

:P

 

I can't help but say it anymore.  It has been programmed in my brain for the phrase "said the blind man..." to be repeated after saying "I see."

2008-02-20 4:43 PM
in reply to: #1224138

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Champion
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Southern Chicago Suburbs, IL
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Subject: RE: A funny poem I remember from chidhood
condorman - 2008-02-20 2:37 PM
crowny2 - 2008-02-20 3:24 PM
tkbslc - 2008-02-20 2:17 PM
crowny2 - 2008-02-20 1:15 PM

condorman - 2008-02-20 2:04 PM ...I see, said the blind man as he picked up his hammer and saw...

Beat me to it.  Only other person I've ever known to know that line. 

Maybe cause it is a lame line....

:P

 

I can't help but say it anymore.  It has been programmed in my brain for the phrase "said the blind man..." to be repeated after saying "I see."

Same here.  Drives the wife batty.



2008-02-20 5:55 PM
in reply to: #1223986

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Champion
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Subject: RE: A funny poem I remember from chidhood

Here's one my grandfather told me

Monkey sitting on the end of a rail
picking his teeth with the end of his tail
Sasafrass leaves and calico sleeves
My old teacher is easy to please.

 

2008-02-20 6:11 PM
in reply to: #1223986

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Elite
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Armpit of Ontario
Subject: RE: A funny poem I remember from chidhood

I remember this one over 30 years later - it was from The Biggest Joke Book Ever (ad no idea why I remember it so well):

Ladies and Jellyspoons!

I stand before you to stand behind you

To tell you something I know nothing about.

Since next Thursday will be Good Friday,

There will be a Father's Day meeting for mothers only.

Please wear your best clothes, if you don't have any

And please stay at home, if you can be there.

Admission is free, please pay at the door

Have a seat on me; please sit on the floor

But no matter where you manage to sit, the man on the balcony will certainly spit.

Now I present to you, the next act:

The four corners of the round table.

2008-02-21 1:13 AM
in reply to: #1223986

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Veteran
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Perth, Oz
Subject: RE: A funny poem I remember from chidhood

for some reason I have two ditty's/poems that my dad used to tell us when mum wasn't around.  we thought they were hilarious!

Oh dear what can the matter be

three old ladies locked in the lavatory

they've been there monday to saturday

nobody knew they were there.

 

and the second

 My auntie mary had a canary, up the leg of her drawers

when she farted, down it darted never went there no more.

 

both were sung to us in a strong yorkshire accent and we would be in hysterics laughing at him!

2008-02-21 6:52 AM
in reply to: #1223986

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Elite
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In my bunk with new shoes and purple sweats.
Subject: RE: A funny poem I remember from chidhood

A funny bird the pelican

his beak holds more than his bellycan

I don't know how the hellycan

that funny bird the pelican

2008-02-21 7:58 AM
in reply to: #1225369

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Champion
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Subject: RE: A funny poem I remember from chidhood
De Cracker - 2008-02-21 6:52 AM

A funny bird the pelican

his beak holds more than his bellycan

I don't know how the hellycan

that funny bird the pelican

 

  • A wonderful bird is a pelican,
    His bill will hold more than his belican.
    He can take in his beak
    Food enough for a week;
    But I'm damned if I see how the helican.
    • "The Pelican" (1910) by Dixon Lanire Merrith is another poem often misattributed to (Ogden) Nash
  • http://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Ogden_Nash#Misattributions

     

     



    2008-02-21 9:58 AM
    in reply to: #1223986

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    Pro
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    Subject: RE: A funny poem I remember from chidhood

    The Pobble, who has no toes,

    Had once as many as we

    When he Aunt Jobisca said he'd lose them all,

    He replied, "Fish-diddle-dee-dee!"

     

    The poem continues to describe the Pobble's adventure.  I liked it even more than The Owl and the Pussycat, which is to say:  a lot. 

    2008-02-21 11:44 AM
    in reply to: #1223986

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    Master
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    Subject: RE: A funny poem I remember from chidhood
    skinny bilinky long legs
    big banana feet
    went to the movies
    couldn't find their seat
    when the movie started
    big banana farted
    skinny bilinky long legs
    big banana feet.
    2008-02-21 11:56 AM
    in reply to: #1223986

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    Master
    2235
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    Pacific Northwest
    Subject: RE: A funny poem I remember from chidhood

    Johnny came to school and said,

    "Durn, I growed another head"

    Teacher said "it's time you knowed

    The word is grew instead of growed".

    Shel Silverstein, Where The Sidewalk Ends

    2008-02-21 12:09 PM
    in reply to: #1223986

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    Master
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    Subject: RE: A funny poem I remember from chidhood

    How I remember every word of this I dont know. It is actually a fun little song:

    Three Irishmen, three Irishmen
    a digging in a ditch.
    One called the other one
    a dirty son of a, Peter had a dog,
    a mighty fine dog was he.
    Gave it to a lady friend
    to keep her company.
    She taught it, she taught
    she taught it how to jump.
    Jumped up her fanny coat
    and bit her on the country boy,
    country boy a sitting on a rock.
    Along came a bumble bee
    and stung him on the cocktail,
    ginger ale, five cents a glass.
    If you dont like the price
    you can shove it up your
    ask me no questions
    I'll tell you know lies.
    If you ever get hit
    with a bucket of sh@#,
    be sure to close your eyes.



    Edited by idahodan 2008-02-21 12:10 PM
    2021-04-23 10:58 PM
    in reply to: condorman


    1

    Subject: RE: A funny poem I remember from chidhood
    What the....I remember this one too. I used to recite this in the class during my elementary days. (Old thread but this one watched my attention, lol)


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