Homeless

There are a number of homeless that choose to be homeless, and make more in a day than we do sometimes by panhandling.

There are those that "milk the system" by "borrowing" someone's child and using it to "tug the heart-strings" to get more sympathy and gullible people to give them money.

There are those that are truly homeless.

Without following this person "home" to see if they actually are homeless, we won't know, will we?

I'm not being cruel, just supplying some facts.  I have seen the "homeless" at the train station in Chicago when I worked there years ago, and didn't contribute.  There are a number of "transients" that work the State Street area in Madison, WI, here.  I don't contribute to them.

If I was to do anything, I would volunteer at the local homeless shelter, or for the church (to which I am a member of but don't attend) helping at the local food pantry.

The poster before me did a great deed.

Any other suggestions?

When I was driving home from LP a few days ago, I spaced out, missed an exit and ended up in the Bronx. Anyway, I was in the left lane in stop-and-go traffic as I watched a homeless (I'm assuming) man pick up discarded pretzel, chip, etc., bags and pour the crumbs from each of those bags into one bag. I am assuming he was just trying to get enough crumbs and remains to get a decent snack. I had so much food in my car. In fact, from the driver seat, I could easily pick up a bunch of bananas and a never-opened bag of honey wheat pretzels. As I inched closer in traffic, my plan was to give him the bananas and pretzels when I reached him (no shoulder, he was literally a few feet from the cars). But then I got nervous about rolling down my window and having a male stranger get that close to me, so I didn't do it. I felt really guilty and for the rest of the ride, I just sat there thinking about how this guy was going through trash looking for crumbs, and I had more food than I knew what to do with and I couldn't even pass it to him out the window .

He appeared to be younger than me .

Several years ago a guy comes up to with some sob story about how his car broke down on his to a job interview (he didn't look' homeless...but he certainly didn't look dressed for an interview)...and wanted $2 for gas (yes - it was SEVERAL years ago LOL....he probably would have asked for at least $5 now given gas prices!).

Anyway.....I gave him the $2...and felt 'good' about it.....fast-forward about 6 hours.....i was going to a movie with my husband MANY blocks away- and the SAME guy comes up to both of us and says the same thing (well where he was going had changed)!  I just said....sorry fella - I have you $2 about 6 hours ago over by (location)!  He looked stunned....like he was surprised he ran into the same person at a different location!

Now if he was just 'panhandling' it would be one thing...but it bothered me that he was 'walking up to people' on the street with this sob-story and making it hard for them to say 'no'....when clearly he was lying. 

back to the OP:....it's hard to know the reality of that family but that would eat at my conscience too....I would probably do as you said - but only once.  If she is truly in need for her child then I am sure she would really appreciate it.  But if the situation isn't as she portrays then you limit your 'losses'. 

I think it's horrible that I have become so jaded about street people.  I often tell myself (except in cases of mental illness, etc) that they could get a student loan (like I did) and go to school!  They have options to get themselves out of their current situation in many cases (particularly the young ones).

If ya feel bad give some food if ya think the kid is really homeless call CPS.  This may sound heartless but most of the HOMELESS are not. Most of the Will work for food!! will not.  And even with that said there are times when I give just in case.  We are not a heartless nation I used to work for the Texas State Workforce Commission man do we give a lot of money to people and when I would try to help the Recipients get work.... Well that just was not going to happen. Give with the understanding you are probably being taken for a ride but it is yours to give.

Do whatever you feel moved to do.

It's not about whether she's homeless or not - it's about cultivating your heart and spirit.

I see a quote on BT from time to time - "We must be the change we wish to see in the world" (Mohandas Ghandi). Pursue that philosophy and you will know what to do in any given situation.

I see numerous people walk in to/call my office looking for help or assistance.  People in my congregation donate to a discretionary fund that I disperse for financial assistance.  I have helped with food, gas, rent, utilities often in conjunction with other aid agencies in town.  i would wholeheartedly agree to find out about the local outlets for assistance.  They have safeguards in place to minimize fraud or abuse of the system. 

For instance... we never give cash to people.  Someone's hungry? I buy them a meal or groceries.  Gas?  I meet them at the gas station.  Etc.

And really... no offense, but throwing a bag of pretzels out a car window is not much.  i would encourage folks to get involved in the local, grass roots ways your community is reaching out those in need.  Churches, food banks, soup kitchens... whatever.  These organizations aren't just interested in short term fixes, but have resources that can begin to teach folks to fish, not just giving out fish...

-Brian 

Ignore them and go about my day. 

Ouch!

I agree with most posters and my wife thinks she might be using the child too as a sympathy ploy but it still hurts.   Yes, I don't know if she is lying, has her own place, is lazy, etc...  I guess I could engage her in a conversation but would I believe her story.   I imagine my overall thought is why are people begging in this country?  With a simple yea/nay, our elected leaders can agree to allocate billions of dollars to fight a war in a far away land (whether right or not) but it is a struggle just to get a few pittance for the poor here.  I know about people who make more panhandling than I do in my job but that is rare.  There are poor in this country, kids who don't eat, living in the streets.  I guess I am just feeling guilty that I am not doing enough to help my fellow man/woman/child.

Better to be safe than sorry.

What a thought! Revolutionary!