How many train with opposite sex? (Page 2)

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2010-04-03 3:49 PM
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2010-04-03 3:54 PM
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2010-04-03 10:02 PM
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Subject: RE: How many train with opposite sex?
This may be an unpopular opinion, but it's only my opinion. I've been married for 20 years and decided a long time ago to keep myself out of situations where I'm training alone with a member of the opposite sex.
I was asked several years ago to train for a marathon with a female, married neighbor, and told her that I would not do that. A friend of hers made fun of me by saying that I must have a bad marriage if I couldn't be trusted in that kind of situation. However, now after the years have passed, that friend has been through an affair, and her family has had some rough times, because of her casual attitude about avoiding situations which can lead to developing friendships, and romantic relationships, with men other than her husband.
I would much rather miss out on "friendships" with other women if it means I can protect the only friendship which means anything- - the one with my wife (She's my favorite training partner anyway).
2010-04-04 12:38 AM
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Subject: RE: How many train with opposite sex?
Donskiman - 2010-04-03 9:30 AM If people are secure about their relationship, and everything is out in the open, I don't see how training with the opposite sex should present any problems.


Because we are dealing with human beings.
2010-04-04 12:41 AM
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Subject: RE: How many train with opposite sex?
pbarlowtri - 2010-04-03 8:02 PM This may be an unpopular opinion, but it's only my opinion. I've been married for 20 years and decided a long time ago to keep myself out of situations where I'm training alone with a member of the opposite sex. I was asked several years ago to train for a marathon with a female, married neighbor, and told her that I would not do that. A friend of hers made fun of me by saying that I must have a bad marriage if I couldn't be trusted in that kind of situation. However, now after the years have passed, that friend has been through an affair, and her family has had some rough times, because of her casual attitude about avoiding situations which can lead to developing friendships, and romantic relationships, with men other than her husband. I would much rather miss out on "friendships" with other women if it means I can protect the only friendship which means anything- - the one with my wife (She's my favorite training partner anyway).


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2010-04-04 1:43 PM
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Subject: RE: How many train with opposite sex?
r1237h - 2010-04-03 11:38 PM
Donskiman - 2010-04-03 9:30 AM If people are secure about their relationship, and everything is out in the open, I don't see how training with the opposite sex should present any problems.


Because we are dealing with human beings.


You missed the qualifiers. I can see where there could be problems if people are insecure, and/or they do things behind their partners back.

2010-04-04 8:26 PM
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2010-04-04 8:39 PM
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Subject: RE: How many train with opposite sex?
pbarlowtri - 2010-04-03 10:02 PM This may be an unpopular opinion, but it's only my opinion. I've been married for 20 years and decided a long time ago to keep myself out of situations where I'm training alone with a member of the opposite sex. I was asked several years ago to train for a marathon with a female, married neighbor, and told her that I would not do that. A friend of hers made fun of me by saying that I must have a bad marriage if I couldn't be trusted in that kind of situation. However, now after the years have passed, that friend has been through an affair, and her family has had some rough times, because of her casual attitude about avoiding situations which can lead to developing friendships, and romantic relationships, with men other than her husband. I would much rather miss out on "friendships" with other women if it means I can protect the only friendship which means anything- - the one with my wife (She's my favorite training partner anyway).


Good answer....Because it does happen.
2010-04-04 8:49 PM
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Subject: RE: How many train with opposite sex?

opps double post



Edited by ransick 2010-04-04 9:11 PM
2010-04-04 8:49 PM
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Subject: RE: How many train with opposite sex?
r1237h - 2010-04-04 12:41 AM
pbarlowtri - 2010-04-03 8:02 PM This may be an unpopular opinion, but it's only my opinion. I've been married for 20 years and decided a long time ago to keep myself out of situations where I'm training alone with a member of the opposite sex. I was asked several years ago to train for a marathon with a female, married neighbor, and told her that I would not do that. A friend of hers made fun of me by saying that I must have a bad marriage if I couldn't be trusted in that kind of situation. However, now after the years have passed, that friend has been through an affair, and her family has had some rough times, because of her casual attitude about avoiding situations which can lead to developing friendships, and romantic relationships, with men other than her husband. I would much rather miss out on "friendships" with other women if it means I can protect the only friendship which means anything- - the one with my wife (She's my favorite training partner anyway).


X2


X3

Edited by ransick 2010-04-04 8:50 PM
2010-04-04 8:51 PM
in reply to: #2766172

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Subject: RE: How many train with opposite sex?
whitecloud - 2010-04-03 2:43 AM My question is how many of you train with a member of the opposite sex?  I live in a Steamboat Springs, CO and our population is around 10,000.  There are a lot of high level athletes in this town including 8+ medals during the winter Olympics but schedules and what we train in is very different.  I run with a lady teacher on Mondays, I swim with three ladies on Wednesdays, and run again on Saturdays with another girl.  Don't get me wrong, whenever a guy calls to go for a ride, run, or swim I'm in, but our schedules and training styles don't work.
My second question is does this upset your significant other?  So far my wife is OK with it, but I am not sure how long it will last.  Curious to hear your response.  I still train 80% of the time on my own but I don't want any issues.  Thanks


Woah!  Chill out Tiger Woods!

I don't really have anything to productive to add to this issue, because I'm not married and just got of a long relationship.  Whew! Thank the Man above!

Either way, I train mostly by myself.  But if I can train with folks, it definitely makes it more fun!  I don't care what sex you are, as long as you challenge me to better myself!

Interesting topic though.

2010-04-04 8:55 PM
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2010-04-04 8:57 PM
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Subject: RE: How many train with opposite sex?
What's the male to female ratio in Steamboat Springs?
2010-04-04 10:40 PM
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Subject: RE: How many train with opposite sex?
I have been married coming up on 10 years and I do most of my training with men, both running and on the bike.  My regular training partner is a married man and when we started to train together more frequently I quickly suggested that our families get together.  We have all become friends now so there is zero weirdness. 

The men I train with on the bike are older and are also all married.  My husband is just thankful I am not riding solo on the open road.  He knows that these guys look after me like they would their own children (our age gaps are large enough that I could be their daughter).  I am not sure how their wives feel because I have not met all of them, but I hope they know that they have nothing to worry about.  These guys have all been married 30+ years.

Trust and communication is key
2010-04-05 2:33 AM
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Subject: RE: How many train with opposite sex?
Donskiman - 2010-04-04 11:43 AM
r1237h - 2010-04-03 11:38 PM
Donskiman - 2010-04-03 9:30 AM If people are secure about their relationship, and everything is out in the open, I don't see how training with the opposite sex should present any problems.


Because we are dealing with human beings.


You missed the qualifiers. I can see where there could be problems if people are insecure, and/or they do things behind their partners back.


No, I didn't miss the qualifiers. However, in  my opinion people don't always use logic and common sense in such situations. In addition, a person may have 100% faith in his/her wife/husband, but not be too sure about the training partner.

And one may get up in the morning, have a lousy day, and for no reason at all, be uncomfortable with the idea of a training partner of the opposite sex, even tho there has been no problem with this up till now.

You think that this is impossible? I disagree.
2010-04-05 8:58 AM
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Subject: RE: How many train with opposite sex?
Interesting.  I think most active runner's, cyclists will find themselves training with the opposite sex at some point.  That's how I met my wife over 15-years ago.  Neither of us were married at the time but she was engaged.  Things do happen.  I have friends in what appeard to be in great marriage where they have been blindsided with finding out their spouse has had an affair.  It happens...even with relationships here on BT. Being secure with your spuse has nothing to do with it! Trust can be broken. That said, I still train with the opposite gender but usually only in a group, or with someone that I have known for years and my wife knows as well.  I think the mojority of time it's no more than a training partner...but let's be honest...men are men and sometimes stuff happens.

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