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2013-06-18 11:50 AM

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Subject: Open mouth, insert foot!
I see this girl in our group in the hall. She is wearing a dress and Nike running shoes. It is lunch time so I say, "You going walking?"

She says "No, just heading to my desk to eat my lunch"

And stupid me, instead of just letting it go, says, "Oh, it's just that your tennis shoes don’t really go with your dress!"

I knew I'd stepped on it the second after it came out of my mouth.


2013-06-18 12:04 PM
in reply to: Rogillio

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Subject: RE: Open mouth, insert foot!
I did something similar at work.  ONe of the candidates came in for testing and had on "Run for Boston" tech shirt that our lock running store sold.  I assumed that she was a runner so I asked if she was doing the next local race and she said she wasn't a runner, it was just a shirt to wear.  A friend had given it to her.  OOPS!
2013-06-18 12:05 PM
in reply to: Rogillio

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Champion
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Subject: RE: Open mouth, insert foot!
Men's Rules for Giving Fashion Advice to Women:

Rule #1: They probably aren't interested in your opinion.
Rule #2: There is no rule #2.
2013-06-18 12:37 PM
in reply to: jmk-brooklyn

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Subject: RE: Open mouth, insert foot!

 

Haha face meet palm.

2013-06-18 1:00 PM
in reply to: Aarondb4

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Subject: RE: Open mouth, insert foot!
There is an entire thread devoted to the dumb chit guys say in the Womens forum of ST. 
2013-06-18 1:08 PM
in reply to: Rogillio

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Subject: RE: Open mouth, insert foot!
Do you live near a place with an active metro system?

Females in skirts, pants suits and such with Danskos or Landaus amongst others are pretty much the standard. Generally, said female has a pair of heels or flats in her hand or purse as well.

Then again, some just leave an assortment of heels in their desk drawers and don't bother taking them home.



2013-06-18 2:15 PM
in reply to: DanielG

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Subject: RE: Open mouth, insert foot!

My sister told me a story once....

When she was pregnant with her first she was all glowing about being pregnant and what not. She was in an elevator with a women and she started to get chatty about babies and due dates. She asked the woman "When are you due?" . The woman answered with "I'm not pregnant".

Ooops!

2013-06-18 2:17 PM
in reply to: jmk-brooklyn

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Subject: RE: Open mouth, insert foot!
Originally posted by jmk-brooklyn

Men's Rules for Giving Fashion Advice to Women:

Rule #1: They probably aren't interested in your opinion.
Rule #2: There is no rule #2.


In HR the rules are:

1. Don't say anything about what anyone is wearing unless it violated company rules and policies.
2. See rule one

2013-06-18 2:42 PM
in reply to: jmk-brooklyn

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Subject: RE: Open mouth, insert foot!
Originally posted by jmk-brooklyn

Men's Rules for Giving Fashion Advice to Women:

Rule #1: They probably aren't interested in your opinion.
Rule #2: There is no rule #2.


They then need to stop asking.


2013-06-18 2:44 PM
in reply to: Rogillio

Iron Donkey
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Subject: RE: Open mouth, insert foot!
Originally posted by Rogillio

I see this girl in our group in the hall. She is wearing a dress and Nike running shoes. It is lunch time so I say, "You going walking?"

She says "No, just heading to my desk to eat my lunch"

And stupid me, instead of just letting it go, says, "Oh, it's just that your tennis shoes don’t really go with your dress!"

I knew I'd stepped on it the second after it came out of my mouth.


You noted "Nike running shoes" and then you stated "tennis shoes" - WELL, MAN! WHICH ONE ARE THEY???!!!!
2013-06-18 2:44 PM
in reply to: trigal38

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Subject: RE: Open mouth, insert foot!
Originally posted by trigal38

My sister told me a story once....

When she was pregnant with her first she was all glowing about being pregnant and what not. She was in an elevator with a women and she started to get chatty about babies and due dates. She asked the woman "When are you due?" . The woman answered with "I'm not pregnant".

Ooops!




Oh that is classic. I learned long ago to NEVER ask a woman if she was pregrant even if she was going into labor. Always allow her to volunteer that she is pregnant...no matter how 'pregnant' she looks.

On a related not, I've also learned the appropiate/cautious response to any woman's statement, "I just found out I am pregnant" is a very calm quation, "And how do you feel about that?!" If she is thrilled, than so am I.


2013-06-18 2:46 PM
in reply to: 1stTimeTri

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Subject: RE: Open mouth, insert foot!
Originally posted by 1stTimeTri

Originally posted by Rogillio

I see this girl in our group in the hall. She is wearing a dress and Nike running shoes. It is lunch time so I say, "You going walking?"

She says "No, just heading to my desk to eat my lunch"

And stupid me, instead of just letting it go, says, "Oh, it's just that your tennis shoes don’t really go with your dress!"

I knew I'd stepped on it the second after it came out of my mouth.


You noted "Nike running shoes" and then you stated "tennis shoes" - WELL, MAN! WHICH ONE ARE THEY???!!!!


Yeah, I guess I'm old school. I sometimes call them sneakers too and get funny looks from my kids.
2013-06-18 2:48 PM
in reply to: Goosedog

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Subject: RE: Open mouth, insert foot!
Originally posted by Goosedog

Originally posted by jmk-brooklyn

Men's Rules for Giving Fashion Advice to Women:

Rule #1: They probably aren't interested in your opinion.
Rule #2: There is no rule #2.


They then need to stop asking.





Classic Al Bundy response: "No Peg, the dress does not make you look fat, the FAT makes you look fat!"
2013-06-18 2:57 PM
in reply to: trigal38

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Subject: RE: Open mouth, insert foot!
Originally posted by trigal38

My sister told me a story once....

When she was pregnant with her first she was all glowing about being pregnant and what not. She was in an elevator with a women and she started to get chatty about babies and due dates. She asked the woman "When are you due?" . The woman answered with "I'm not pregnant".

Ooops!




Dave Barry said it best:


Never assume a woman is pregnant unless you see a baby emerging from her body at that very instant.

2013-06-18 2:59 PM
in reply to: Goosedog

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Subject: RE: Open mouth, insert foot!

Originally posted by Goosedog
Originally posted by jmk-brooklyn Men's Rules for Giving Fashion Advice to Women: Rule #1: They probably aren't interested in your opinion. Rule #2: There is no rule #2.
They then need to stop asking.

Amen brotha!

For fork's sake, ladies, don't set your man up to fail like that.  You know when you look good.  You know when something's meh, and if you feel like you need to ask if you "look fat"-- yup, you probably do.  So don't, just don't.

"Do you like my ________?"  How is the answer to this ever satisfying? The prompted "compliment"--ugh.

2013-06-18 3:48 PM
in reply to: DanielG

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Subject: RE: Open mouth, insert foot!
Originally posted by DanielG

Originally posted by trigal38

My sister told me a story once....

When she was pregnant with her first she was all glowing about being pregnant and what not. She was in an elevator with a women and she started to get chatty about babies and due dates. She asked the woman "When are you due?" . The woman answered with "I'm not pregnant".

Ooops!




Dave Barry said it best:


Never assume a woman is pregnant unless you see a baby emerging from her body at that very instant.




And even then, I am not going to acknowledge her pregnancy unless she acknowledges it first.

I made the, "when are you due?" mistake years ago. You will only do that once in your life.


2013-06-18 4:58 PM
in reply to: 0

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Subject: RE: Open mouth, insert foot!
Originally posted by trigal38

My sister told me a story once....

When she was pregnant with her first she was all glowing about being pregnant and what not. She was in an elevator with a women and she started to get chatty about babies and due dates. She asked the woman "When are you due?" . The woman answered with "I'm not pregnant".

Ooops!

I have a rule...never ask a woman if she is pregnant, unless you literally see the baby coming out. (I think I stole this from a comedian...)

ETA - I guess it was Dave Berry. He is a smart man!



Edited by lkct01234 2013-06-18 4:59 PM
2013-06-18 5:29 PM
in reply to: lkct01234

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Subject: RE: Open mouth, insert foot!

I haven't asked a woman if she's preggo, and I don't ask for clothing advice unless I want the truth (and yes, the truth sometimes hurts). But a couple of weeks ago...

My FIL has a bike seat that looks/feels like a foam bench. DH had talked about it when they came for their yearly visit back in February, but I thought he was just being picky. Well, on a trip to KS, I thought I would get some time on a bike since it wasn't being used. 20 minutes into a neighborhood ride and I couldn't get off the thing fast enough.  Went inside and asked MIL "How in the world he can even ride the bike!?!?  I couldn't pedal right because the seat is so poorly shaped for comfortable and efficient movement!" 

DH had failed to mention that MIL bought the seat for FIL. I think she still loves me. Surprised

2013-06-18 7:30 PM
in reply to: 0

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Subject: RE: Open mouth, insert foot!

You can still get caught in the "pregnancy trap" even if you never ask.

I had a coworker who was about 6 months pregnant.  We were talking outside the elevator and one of our other coworkers comments..."oh...I didn't know you were pregnant!"  BUSTED!!!  Her response (jokingly)..."so you just thought I was fat???"  LOL!



Edited by Jason N 2013-06-18 7:30 PM
2013-06-18 7:37 PM
in reply to: Jason N

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Subject: RE: Open mouth, insert foot!

I know that I'm truly in love with my wife, because she continually gives me the opportunity to end our marriage. (likely by ending my life.)

 

She frequently asks "Does this dress make me look pregnant?"

 

And then somehow I'm able to make "No, your belly makes you look pregnant" sound exactly like "No, dear, you look great!"

 

(For those of you who have not met me in person, which is all of you, I would NEVER EVER say this to my wife.  While I generally believe that there are no "sacred cows" when it comes to humor, even *I* am not stupid enough to slay this one)

2013-06-18 7:52 PM
in reply to: moondawg14

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Subject: RE: Open mouth, insert foot!
Originally posted by moondawg14

I know that I'm truly in love with my wife, because she continually gives me the opportunity to end our marriage. (likely by ending my life.)

 

She frequently asks "Does this dress make me look pregnant?"

 

And then somehow I'm able to make "No, your belly makes you look pregnant" sound exactly like "No, dear, you look great!"

 

(For those of you who have not met me in person, which is all of you, I would NEVER EVER say this to my wife.  While I generally believe that there are no "sacred cows" when it comes to humor, even *I* am not stupid enough to slay this one)

If I were your wife I would forgive a lot because of your ability to rock that Jetta with a <24 hour turn-around.  A lot o forgiveness.



2013-06-18 8:06 PM
in reply to: switch

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Subject: RE: Open mouth, insert foot!
Originally posted by switch
Originally posted by moondawg14

I know that I'm truly in love with my wife, because she continually gives me the opportunity to end our marriage. (likely by ending my life.)

 

She frequently asks "Does this dress make me look pregnant?"

 

And then somehow I'm able to make "No, your belly makes you look pregnant" sound exactly like "No, dear, you look great!"

 

(For those of you who have not met me in person, which is all of you, I would NEVER EVER say this to my wife.  While I generally believe that there are no "sacred cows" when it comes to humor, even *I* am not stupid enough to slay this one)

If I were your wife I would forgive a lot because of your ability to rock that Jetta with a

 

If I ever tell my wife she looks pregnant, I'll definitely be in the market. :^)

2013-06-18 8:40 PM
in reply to: moondawg14

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Subject: RE: Open mouth, insert foot!
Originally posted by moondawg14
Originally posted by switch
Originally posted by moondawg14

I know that I'm truly in love with my wife, because she continually gives me the opportunity to end our marriage. (likely by ending my life.)

 

She frequently asks "Does this dress make me look pregnant?"

 

And then somehow I'm able to make "No, your belly makes you look pregnant" sound exactly like "No, dear, you look great!"

 

(For those of you who have not met me in person, which is all of you, I would NEVER EVER say this to my wife.  While I generally believe that there are no "sacred cows" when it comes to humor, even *I* am not stupid enough to slay this one)

If I were your wife I would forgive a lot because of your ability to rock that Jetta with a

 

If I ever tell my wife she looks pregnant, I'll definitely be in the market. :^)

Haha! If you get "on the market" make sure it isn't for that :)

As a woman who gained an extraordinary amount of weight with all three pregnancies (lost it each time with no, uh, "residual" side effects--small miracle right there folks), I had some pretty hilarious pregnancy, immediate post pregnancy comments.

Keep in mind, the weight gain was off the chain: 55. 65. 73. Brutal.

Highlight reel--these seem unbelievable, but my husband will vouch for me:

One woman, came up to me from behind while I was talking to a friend, "I didn't recognize you from behind--your azz is soooo huge!"  What do you say to that?

At 11 weeks, number three, I told two docs at a social gathering that I was expecting at the time.  Pulled my coat back--audible gasp.  One insisted I had my dates wrong "that's not an 11 week pregnancy" the other, strongly recommended getting a US as "that's not the belly of a singleton."

I had another woman ask me when I was due, when I returned to work 4 weeks post after #3.

When I see these women now--and I see them all regularly--I smile when they marvel at my "tri body".   I could kick any of their azzes.  By a lot. 

 

 

 

2013-06-18 10:15 PM
in reply to: switch

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Subject: RE: Open mouth, insert foot!
My FIL asks my wife just about every time he visits when she is going on a diet. It bugged the crap out of her, but now she is having fun with it. My FIL is overweight and over the years I've heard him say at least a dozen times that he is starting his new diet as soon as he finishes this box of ice cream or that bag of chips. Now she says "I'm going on a diet as soon as I finish this snack" and we get a chuckle out of it.

Same inactive FIL that gives me advice on exercising too much BTW. God love him :-).
2013-06-19 7:32 AM
in reply to: Rogillio

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Subject: RE: Open mouth, insert foot!
Originally posted by Rogillio

Originally posted by trigal38

My sister told me a story once....

When she was pregnant with her first she was all glowing about being pregnant and what not. She was in an elevator with a women and she started to get chatty about babies and due dates. She asked the woman "When are you due?" . The woman answered with "I'm not pregnant".

Ooops!




Oh that is classic. I learned long ago to NEVER ask a woman if she was pregrant even if she was going into labor. Always allow her to volunteer that she is pregnant...no matter how 'pregnant' she looks.

On a related not, I've also learned the appropiate/cautious response to any woman's statement, "I just found out I am pregnant" is a very calm quation, "And how do you feel about that?!" If she is thrilled, than so am I.
I believe it was my second or third year of teaching (I was around 40 at the time) On of my female students had really nice long blonde hair that came almost to her waist. She came in on a Monday morning and it was down to shoulder length. I told her that I loved her new hair style. She immediately burst into tears.
I asked what was wrong and she told me that her brother had gotten some sort of household adhesive into it and it could not be washed out and she had to have it cut.
Since then when a woman has a new anything I always ask how she feels about it first.
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