Other Resources My Cup of Joe » What happened to the simple Thank You? Rss Feed  
Moderators: k9car363, the bear, DerekL, alicefoeller Reply
 
 
of 2
 
 
2013-12-26 8:37 AM

User image

Pro
4174
200020001002525
Keller, Texas
Subject: What happened to the simple Thank You?
A bit of a rant here.Isn't just me, or has the simple lack of appreciation or gratitude gone by the wayside? We send gifts to family on the east coast. 2 nephews (30 and 17). 2 nieces (32 and 28) and nephews baby (1.5). Is it too much to expect a simple thank you? We talked to all families. 1 side gathered on Christmas eve to open gifts. We talked to them for almost an hour and not one word of thanks except for my FIL who did thank us. Nothing from the nieces or nephew.On the other side, IMd with my brother yesterday and he told me that nephew loved the UA sweatshirt we sent. Well, nephew has his own iPhone, laptop, and tablet. But he could not find an outlet to say thanks himself? These are not babies we are talking about. They are all adults. I am not asking or expecting written thank you notes, but a mention on a call, a text or even an IM on Facebook would be sufficient. Just something to let me now you received the gift.I'm sure if we stopped sending them, that would get some attention. Maybe I was raised in a different time and my expectations are too high. But some sort of appreciation would be, well, appreciated.Is it just me?. Sorry for the run on paragraph. Guess BT still does. It like iPads.

Edited by dodgersmom 2013-12-26 8:39 AM


2013-12-26 8:53 AM
in reply to: dodgersmom

User image

Veteran
976
500100100100100252525
New Hampshire
Subject: RE: What happened to the simple Thank You?
Doesn't seem like too much to me. Back in the day (I'm only 32 so now too far back) I remember writing out thank you cards for all the gifts I got on xmas. Now with texts and emails I think a quick note wouldn't be out of the question. I wrote out thank you emails to all the grand parents last night for the gifts for our son (2 1/2 years old) attached with a pic of him opening his gifts even though they came to our house and we thanked them profusely before they left.
2013-12-26 9:08 AM
in reply to: #4918294

User image

Supersonicus Idioticus
2439
200010010010010025
Thunder Bay, ON
Subject: RE: What happened to the simple Thank You?
Kind of a hijack, but what about when someone gives you an unexpected gift and suddenly you feel compelled to give one back? A simple thank you would be nice too. You're on to something here.
2013-12-26 9:13 AM
in reply to: dodgersmom

Iron Donkey
38643
50005000500050005000500050002000100050010025
, Wisconsin
Subject: RE: What happened to the simple Thank You?

I agree with you, and it shouldn't just occur with the scenario that you ranted about.

2013-12-26 3:00 PM
in reply to: 1stTimeTri

User image

Elite
4547
2000200050025
Subject: RE: What happened to the simple Thank You?
I totally hear you and agree with you.
If you ask me, it sounds like it's time to shorten your Christmas gift-giving list, beginning...immediately.

Don't worry about it, don't fret about it, it is what it is.
Some folks are just inconsiderate.

2013-12-26 3:13 PM
in reply to: ChineseDemocracy

User image

Champion
6503
50001000500
NOVA - Ironic for an Endurance Athlete
Subject: RE: What happened to the simple Thank You?

Maybe they are home hand writing thank you's right now.  That is what I try to do.



2013-12-26 3:58 PM
in reply to: dodgersmom

User image

Master
2946
200050010010010010025
Centennial, CO
Subject: RE: What happened to the simple Thank You?

Thank you would be nice.

BUT...  You should never give a gift to get a thank you.  There should be no strings attached.  And from  your side, there should be no obligation.  Gifts are given out of the goodness of your heart.  Thank yous are the same.  

So while I understand your rant.  It seems rather petty that you expect something of them if you give them a gift.  

 

PS.. I always say thank you.

2013-12-26 5:18 PM
in reply to: velocomp

User image

Pro
4824
20002000500100100100
Houston
Subject: RE: What happened to the simple Thank You?
Originally posted by velocomp

Thank you would be nice.

BUT...  You should never give a gift to get a thank you.  There should be no strings attached.  And from  your side, there should be no obligation.  Gifts are given out of the goodness of your heart.  Thank yous are the same.  

So while I understand your rant.  It seems rather petty that you expect something of them if you give them a gift.  

 

PS.. I always say thank you.




This.
I don't expect a thank you.
I also do not ask my children to contact every single person who sends them a gift and thank them.
If you want to give gifts then do it. If it only pisses you off every year, stop.
Let it go.
2013-12-26 5:49 PM
in reply to: 0

User image

Pro
15655
5000500050005001002525
Subject: RE: What happened to the simple Thank You?

We say thank you, but don't expect it for gifts that we give.  We also require our children to say thank you or write a note.  It's just the right thing to do from our way of thinking, so that's what we teach our kids.  When they are on their own they can do whatever they please, but right now they live in a dictatorship when it comes to manners and politeness.  The good news is that now they almost never need to be reminded. 



Edited by Left Brain 2013-12-26 5:51 PM
2013-12-26 6:18 PM
in reply to: pga_mike

User image

Elite
4547
2000200050025
Subject: RE: What happened to the simple Thank You?
Originally posted by pga_mike

Maybe they are home hand writing thank you's right now.  That is what I try to do.




Good point, but nowadays, not likely to happen.
You should be commended. My yearly rant is about the folks who send out Christmas postcards without an ounce of personal touch/personal connection.
I guess I'm expecting too much.
2013-12-26 8:57 PM
in reply to: ChineseDemocracy

User image

Queen BTich
12411
500050002000100100100100
,
Subject: RE: What happened to the simple Thank You?
I thanked you!! and I'll do it again: I love it, and it was very sweet.


2013-12-27 3:21 AM
in reply to: Comet

User image

Elite
6387
50001000100100100252525
Subject: RE: What happened to the simple Thank You?

Thank you for this thread. It was very considerate of you. 

2013-12-27 8:09 AM
in reply to: powerman

User image

Bronze member
Subject: RE: What happened to the simple Thank You?

Not really the same thing but I have noticed a general "it's all about me" attitude with some of my neices & nephews.

We had a 50th wedding celebration for my in-laws about a month ago. My neices (15 & 17) were the FIRST in line to get cake. I said well maybe I can cut the cake and you girls could pass out to guests. They flat out said no way, took their cake and sat down. I was honestly shocked. Why would you not want to help? I don't even understand.

At the in-laws for Christmas the same crew sat on their rear ends while my 5 & 7 year old and all the adults handed out all the presents to them. Really?  Now we're too cool to get up and pass out our own freaking presents? Again, why would you not want to help? They don't clean up their own plate after they eat, they don't offer to wash a dish, nothing. It is setting a bad example. At my parents house the next day my son looked at me and said "I don't want to pass out the presents". I told him, You WILL be a helper or you won't open a present. He hopped to it.

So for me, maybe they do tell us thank you because we are sitting right there but there is still a general feeling of entitlement with these particular kids.

 

2013-12-27 8:24 AM
in reply to: trigal38

User image

Extreme Veteran
3025
2000100025
Maryland
Subject: RE: What happened to the simple Thank You?

Originally posted by trigal38

Not really the same thing but I have noticed a general "it's all about me" attitude with some of my neices & nephews.

We had a 50th wedding celebration for my in-laws about a month ago. My neices (15 & 17) were the FIRST in line to get cake. I said well maybe I can cut the cake and you girls could pass out to guests. They flat out said no way, took their cake and sat down. I was honestly shocked. Why would you not want to help? I don't even understand.

At the in-laws for Christmas the same crew sat on their rear ends while my 5 & 7 year old and all the adults handed out all the presents to them. Really?  Now we're too cool to get up and pass out our own freaking presents? Again, why would you not want to help? They don't clean up their own plate after they eat, they don't offer to wash a dish, nothing. It is setting a bad example. At my parents house the next day my son looked at me and said "I don't want to pass out the presents". I told him, You WILL be a helper or you won't open a present. He hopped to it.

So for me, maybe they do tell us thank you because we are sitting right there but there is still a general feeling of entitlement with these particular kids.

 

They are teenage girls. Have you met teenage girls?

2013-12-27 8:26 AM
in reply to: trigal38

User image


489
100100100100252525
Subject: RE: What happened to the simple Thank You?
Originally posted by trigal38

Not really the same thing but I have noticed a general "it's all about me" attitude with some of my neices & nephews.

We had a 50th wedding celebration for my in-laws about a month ago. My neices (15 & 17) were the FIRST in line to get cake. I said well maybe I can cut the cake and you girls could pass out to guests. They flat out said no way, took their cake and sat down. I was honestly shocked. Why would you not want to help? I don't even understand.

At the in-laws for Christmas the same crew sat on their rear ends while my 5 & 7 year old and all the adults handed out all the presents to them. Really?  Now we're too cool to get up and pass out our own freaking presents? Again, why would you not want to help? They don't clean up their own plate after they eat, they don't offer to wash a dish, nothing. It is setting a bad example. At my parents house the next day my son looked at me and said "I don't want to pass out the presents". I told him, You WILL be a helper or you won't open a present. He hopped to it.

So for me, maybe they do tell us thank you because we are sitting right there but there is still a general feeling of entitlement with these particular kids.

 




You've answered the problem in your description of the situation.

What happened when they refused to do it compared to when yours tried to refuse to do it?

Too many parents are stuck with their faces in electronic devices or their own selfishness to raise their kids. Others want to be friends with their kids more than they want to be their parents. Sad times but not the kids fault.

'Generation entitlement' exists because people are too soft on their kids and try to explain what's important in life. Kids don't listen to adults much when it comes to philosophy and they learn their lessons through life experiences. We seem reluctant to let them have any.

I'm part of the problem too. I won't tolerate any of the behaviour outlined in this thread from my children but I still worry that my 11 year old daughter doesn't spend enough time unsupervised or out of the house to learn life's lessons and have trouble accepting you have to work for what you have. My 7 year old is even worse - when we tried to teach the value of money once her (natural and honest) reply was to just get some more out of the wall.
2013-12-27 8:44 AM
in reply to: trigal38

User image

Pro
15655
5000500050005001002525
Subject: RE: What happened to the simple Thank You?

Originally posted by trigal38

Not really the same thing but I have noticed a general "it's all about me" attitude with some of my neices & nephews.

We had a 50th wedding celebration for my in-laws about a month ago. My neices (15 & 17) were the FIRST in line to get cake. I said well maybe I can cut the cake and you girls could pass out to guests. They flat out said no way, took their cake and sat down. I was honestly shocked. Why would you not want to help? I don't even understand.

At the in-laws for Christmas the same crew sat on their rear ends while my 5 & 7 year old and all the adults handed out all the presents to them. Really?  Now we're too cool to get up and pass out our own freaking presents? Again, why would you not want to help? They don't clean up their own plate after they eat, they don't offer to wash a dish, nothing. It is setting a bad example. At my parents house the next day my son looked at me and said "I don't want to pass out the presents". I told him, You WILL be a helper or you won't open a present. He hopped to it.

So for me, maybe they do tell us thank you because we are sitting right there but there is still a general feeling of entitlement with these particular kids.

 

You could send them to my house for a week or so.  They'll help......or they won't eat. 

I have 3 teenagers at home and it generaly doesn't take alot to keep them on board with the program.....but I didn't do much asking in the earlier years.  These days, I don't have to say much, but I'm trying to imagine one of my kids saying "no way" to me when I asked them to do something.  That makes me laugh. (not laughing at you trigal, they aren't your kids)



2013-12-27 9:15 AM
in reply to: Left Brain

User image

Bronze member
Subject: RE: What happened to the simple Thank You?

Originally posted by Left Brain

Originally posted by trigal38

Not really the same thing but I have noticed a general "it's all about me" attitude with some of my neices & nephews.

We had a 50th wedding celebration for my in-laws about a month ago. My neices (15 & 17) were the FIRST in line to get cake. I said well maybe I can cut the cake and you girls could pass out to guests. They flat out said no way, took their cake and sat down. I was honestly shocked. Why would you not want to help? I don't even understand.

At the in-laws for Christmas the same crew sat on their rear ends while my 5 & 7 year old and all the adults handed out all the presents to them. Really?  Now we're too cool to get up and pass out our own freaking presents? Again, why would you not want to help? They don't clean up their own plate after they eat, they don't offer to wash a dish, nothing. It is setting a bad example. At my parents house the next day my son looked at me and said "I don't want to pass out the presents". I told him, You WILL be a helper or you won't open a present. He hopped to it.

So for me, maybe they do tell us thank you because we are sitting right there but there is still a general feeling of entitlement with these particular kids.

 

You could send them to my house for a week or so.  They'll help......or they won't eat. 

I have 3 teenagers at home and it generaly doesn't take alot to keep them on board with the program.....but I didn't do much asking in the earlier years.  These days, I don't have to say much, but I'm trying to imagine one of my kids saying "no way" to me when I asked them to do something.  That makes me laugh. (not laughing at you trigal, they aren't your kids)

I know right?! I'm looking all around at their parents thinking are you hearing this? Do you notice they are just sitting here doing NOTHING? Not only doing nothing but blatantly refusing to help! It is all of my self control to keep my mouth shut from giving  them a lesson on good manners but like you said, they are not my kids. I think I need to wrap up a copy of the storybook "The Little Red Hen" for each of them for their birthdays .

 

2013-12-27 10:57 AM
in reply to: trigal38

User image

Pro
9391
500020002000100100100252525
Omaha, NE
Subject: RE: What happened to the simple Thank You?

I like to go back to one of my favorite Dr. Phil life laws:  Life Law #8: We Teach People How to Treat Us

If you give them gifts year after year and they do not thank you, then you are teaching them that it is acceptable to not say thank you because you keep sending gifts.  So, yes they should be considerate and say thank you, but you also own your side of it by allowing them to do it.

 

2013-12-27 3:36 PM
in reply to: tuwood

User image

Expert
1258
10001001002525
Marin County, California
Subject: RE: What happened to the simple Thank You?
Since the word of the year is 'selfie' I figure that alone explains alot about how people behave towards each other these days.
2013-12-27 4:03 PM
in reply to: dodgersmom

User image

Elite
3060
200010002525
N Carolina
Subject: RE: What happened to the simple Thank You?
You should stop sending gifts to all of those people, with the possible exception of the 17 year old. Not because they didn't say thank you but because they are all adults now.
2013-12-27 5:17 PM
in reply to: trigal38

User image

Champion
5312
5000100100100
Calgary
Subject: RE: What happened to the simple Thank You?
Originally posted by trigal38

Originally posted by Left Brain

Originally posted by trigal38

Not really the same thing but I have noticed a general "it's all about me" attitude with some of my neices & nephews.

We had a 50th wedding celebration for my in-laws about a month ago. My neices (15 & 17) were the FIRST in line to get cake. I said well maybe I can cut the cake and you girls could pass out to guests. They flat out said no way, took their cake and sat down. I was honestly shocked. Why would you not want to help? I don't even understand.

At the in-laws for Christmas the same crew sat on their rear ends while my 5 & 7 year old and all the adults handed out all the presents to them. Really?  Now we're too cool to get up and pass out our own freaking presents? Again, why would you not want to help? They don't clean up their own plate after they eat, they don't offer to wash a dish, nothing. It is setting a bad example. At my parents house the next day my son looked at me and said "I don't want to pass out the presents". I told him, You WILL be a helper or you won't open a present. He hopped to it.

So for me, maybe they do tell us thank you because we are sitting right there but there is still a general feeling of entitlement with these particular kids.

 

You could send them to my house for a week or so.  They'll help......or they won't eat. 

I have 3 teenagers at home and it generaly doesn't take alot to keep them on board with the program.....but I didn't do much asking in the earlier years.  These days, I don't have to say much, but I'm trying to imagine one of my kids saying "no way" to me when I asked them to do something.  That makes me laugh. (not laughing at you trigal, they aren't your kids)

I know right?! I'm looking all around at their parents thinking are you hearing this? Do you notice they are just sitting here doing NOTHING? Not only doing nothing but blatantly refusing to help! It is all of my self control to keep my mouth shut from giving  them a lesson on good manners but like you said, they are not my kids. I think I need to wrap up a copy of the storybook "The Little Red Hen" for each of them for their birthdays .

 




I struggle with how to treat children who aren't acting how I approve of. I guess, at that age, I mean if they were 22 and told you that, what are you going to do. I think I probably would tell them given your relation, that is a pretty rude thing to say to me and you are acting a bit despicable. Now, being 15, I don't know if you want to go parenting another parents kid. But at the same time do you want to be giving cake to kids who are being rude. Perhaps the appropriate thing to do would be to tell them to go talk to their parents about having some cake because you are fairly certain they would not approve of that attitude and until you hear otherwise you are going to be holding their cake in trust.

If children are being childish they probably should be treated like children.


2013-12-27 6:42 PM
in reply to: dmiller5

User image

Elite
4547
2000200050025
Subject: RE: What happened to the simple Thank You?
Originally posted by dmiller5

Originally posted by trigal38

Not really the same thing but I have noticed a general "it's all about me" attitude with some of my neices & nephews.

We had a 50th wedding celebration for my in-laws about a month ago. My neices (15 & 17) were the FIRST in line to get cake. I said well maybe I can cut the cake and you girls could pass out to guests. They flat out said no way, took their cake and sat down. I was honestly shocked. Why would you not want to help? I don't even understand.

At the in-laws for Christmas the same crew sat on their rear ends while my 5 & 7 year old and all the adults handed out all the presents to them. Really?  Now we're too cool to get up and pass out our own freaking presents? Again, why would you not want to help? They don't clean up their own plate after they eat, they don't offer to wash a dish, nothing. It is setting a bad example. At my parents house the next day my son looked at me and said "I don't want to pass out the presents". I told him, You WILL be a helper or you won't open a present. He hopped to it.

So for me, maybe they do tell us thank you because we are sitting right there but there is still a general feeling of entitlement with these particular kids.

 



They are teenage girls. Have you met teenage girls?





I've met teenage girls. I've met respectful, caring teenage girls...and I've also met ones that behave like the 15 and 17 year old described in the above post. Basic point is that it's not acceptable and it's behavior that's reinforced over and over and over from a very early age unfortunately.

2013-12-28 11:27 AM
in reply to: dmiller5

User image

Alpharetta, Georgia
Bronze member
Subject: RE: What happened to the simple Thank You?

Originally posted by dmiller5

Originally posted by trigal38

Not really the same thing but I have noticed a general "it's all about me" attitude with some of my neices & nephews.

We had a 50th wedding celebration for my in-laws about a month ago. My neices (15 & 17) were the FIRST in line to get cake. I said well maybe I can cut the cake and you girls could pass out to guests. They flat out said no way, took their cake and sat down. I was honestly shocked. Why would you not want to help? I don't even understand.

At the in-laws for Christmas the same crew sat on their rear ends while my 5 & 7 year old and all the adults handed out all the presents to them. Really?  Now we're too cool to get up and pass out our own freaking presents? Again, why would you not want to help? They don't clean up their own plate after they eat, they don't offer to wash a dish, nothing. It is setting a bad example. At my parents house the next day my son looked at me and said "I don't want to pass out the presents". I told him, You WILL be a helper or you won't open a present. He hopped to it.

So for me, maybe they do tell us thank you because we are sitting right there but there is still a general feeling of entitlement with these particular kids.

 

They are teenage girls. Have you met teenage girls?

Hmm when my sister and I were teenagers we had a list of weekly chores and assigned nights for table set-up and clean up (I had Tue/Thurs/Sat, which meant I had THANKSGIVING every year - sooo not fair. But I digress). It was not really a choice.

The kids I hang out with these days:
12-year old boy - must keep his areas straightened up and clears dishes only when he wants to do something quicker afterwards. Not a requirement for him. He has to help with his dog and do stuff like bring in groceries from the car, but no other "list" of weekly chores.
10- and 13-year old boys - Both required to do extensive chores, set up and clean up every meal at home - bad attitudes or complaining are not tolerated. Not a choice. 

All 3 boys thanked me profusely for their Christmas gifts.

2013-12-28 3:12 PM
in reply to: lisac957

User image

Pro
4277
20002000100100252525
Parker, CO
Subject: RE: What happened to the simple Thank You?
Originally posted by lisac957

Originally posted by dmiller5

Originally posted by trigal38

Not really the same thing but I have noticed a general "it's all about me" attitude with some of my neices & nephews.

We had a 50th wedding celebration for my in-laws about a month ago. My neices (15 & 17) were the FIRST in line to get cake. I said well maybe I can cut the cake and you girls could pass out to guests. They flat out said no way, took their cake and sat down. I was honestly shocked. Why would you not want to help? I don't even understand.

At the in-laws for Christmas the same crew sat on their rear ends while my 5 & 7 year old and all the adults handed out all the presents to them. Really?  Now we're too cool to get up and pass out our own freaking presents? Again, why would you not want to help? They don't clean up their own plate after they eat, they don't offer to wash a dish, nothing. It is setting a bad example. At my parents house the next day my son looked at me and said "I don't want to pass out the presents". I told him, You WILL be a helper or you won't open a present. He hopped to it.

So for me, maybe they do tell us thank you because we are sitting right there but there is still a general feeling of entitlement with these particular kids.

 

They are teenage girls. Have you met teenage girls?

Hmm when my sister and I were teenagers we had a list of weekly chores and assigned nights for table set-up and clean up (I had Tue/Thurs/Sat, which meant I had THANKSGIVING every year - sooo not fair. But I digress). It was not really a choice.

The kids I hang out with these days:
12-year old boy - must keep his areas straightened up and clears dishes only when he wants to do something quicker afterwards. Not a requirement for him. He has to help with his dog and do stuff like bring in groceries from the car, but no other "list" of weekly chores.
10- and 13-year old boys - Both required to do extensive chores, set up and clean up every meal at home - bad attitudes or complaining are not tolerated. Not a choice. 

All 3 boys thanked me profusely for their Christmas gifts.




This is admirable and obviously the boys have good parenting. I will say that this is not the norm. I have a 12 and 14 year old. While they are good kids, get good grades, don't get into trouble... doing chores, and basically just having them clean-up after themselves is a struggle. This has become even more difficult since my wife and I split almost a year ago. I spend a lot of time running them and their friends around. While my kids are pretty good with thank you's...most of their friends are not. Not quite sure why this is...I think often they are too caught up with whatever they happen to be talking to each other about. Or maybe they just weren't taught good manners. I don't get worked up over it but it would be nice after buying their friends lunch, starbucks, giving them a ride home, etc to receive a simple thank you. More often than not, they go about there business without saying those words. Not anything I have any control over.
2013-12-28 3:36 PM
in reply to: 0

User image

Pro
15655
5000500050005001002525
Subject: RE: What happened to the simple Thank You?

Originally posted by rayd
Originally posted by lisac957

Originally posted by dmiller5

Originally posted by trigal38

Not really the same thing but I have noticed a general "it's all about me" attitude with some of my neices & nephews.

We had a 50th wedding celebration for my in-laws about a month ago. My neices (15 & 17) were the FIRST in line to get cake. I said well maybe I can cut the cake and you girls could pass out to guests. They flat out said no way, took their cake and sat down. I was honestly shocked. Why would you not want to help? I don't even understand.

At the in-laws for Christmas the same crew sat on their rear ends while my 5 & 7 year old and all the adults handed out all the presents to them. Really?  Now we're too cool to get up and pass out our own freaking presents? Again, why would you not want to help? They don't clean up their own plate after they eat, they don't offer to wash a dish, nothing. It is setting a bad example. At my parents house the next day my son looked at me and said "I don't want to pass out the presents". I told him, You WILL be a helper or you won't open a present. He hopped to it.

So for me, maybe they do tell us thank you because we are sitting right there but there is still a general feeling of entitlement with these particular kids.

 

They are teenage girls. Have you met teenage girls?

Hmm when my sister and I were teenagers we had a list of weekly chores and assigned nights for table set-up and clean up (I had Tue/Thurs/Sat, which meant I had THANKSGIVING every year - sooo not fair. But I digress). It was not really a choice.

The kids I hang out with these days:
12-year old boy - must keep his areas straightened up and clears dishes only when he wants to do something quicker afterwards. Not a requirement for him. He has to help with his dog and do stuff like bring in groceries from the car, but no other "list" of weekly chores.
10- and 13-year old boys - Both required to do extensive chores, set up and clean up every meal at home - bad attitudes or complaining are not tolerated. Not a choice. 

All 3 boys thanked me profusely for their Christmas gifts.

This is admirable and obviously the boys have good parenting. I will say that this is not the norm. I have a 12 and 14 year old. While they are good kids, get good grades, don't get into trouble... doing chores, and basically just having them clean-up after themselves is a struggle. This has become even more difficult since my wife and I split almost a year ago. I spend a lot of time running them and their friends around. While my kids are pretty good with thank you's...most of their friends are not. Not quite sure why this is...I think often they are too caught up with whatever they happen to be talking to each other about. Or maybe they just weren't taught good manners. I don't get worked up over it but it would be nice after buying their friends lunch, starbucks, giving them a ride home, etc to receive a simple thank you. More often than not, they go about there business without saying those words. Not anything I have any control over.

True enough, you have absolutely no control over how kids who are not yours act.....the first time.  Every time after that is on you.  If you tolerate it by continuing to "buy lunches", or whatever, then you can't complain about it.  There have been a number of kids that ours had around over the years that no longer are a part of our lives....because having good manners and being respectful is easy to teach, and adhere to, and if you can't, then I'll do all I can to see that my kids hang around with kids who do understand the idea.

The funny thing is, even when I read my own posts here on this thread I sound like some kind of crazy strict parent.....but the fast is, it's REALLY easy to raise kids that are grateful, helpful, respectful, and happy......but you don't get them there by not setting clear lines of what is acceptable behavior.  My wife and I rarely have to step in at all to remind our teenage kids about decent behavior......that work was done awhile ago, and they know exactly what we will and will not tolerate.  I'm guessing that's the case with them, because it never comes up.  Those lessons are in the bank.

Of course, there are other life lessons still to work on......but common respect and manners from a teenager?  Really?  That's a hard thing? 



Edited by Left Brain 2013-12-28 3:42 PM
New Thread
Other Resources My Cup of Joe » What happened to the simple Thank You? Rss Feed  
 
 
of 2
 
 
RELATED POSTS

A simple question.

Started by SoberTriGuy
Views: 1469 Posts: 21

2011-09-08 9:36 AM NRG42

"Simple" tax question

Started by bradword
Views: 935 Posts: 6

2011-01-04 9:17 AM TriRSquared

Simple pleasures Pages: 1 2

Started by KenyonTri
Views: 1780 Posts: 43

2006-12-15 3:39 PM willow

simple green is the best

Started by bootygirl
Views: 1027 Posts: 24

2006-09-13 8:28 AM SuzanneS

10 Simple Rules for Dating My Daughter Pages: 1 2 3

Started by Stake
Views: 2993 Posts: 63

2006-05-25 12:36 PM Stake
RELATED ARTICLES
date : January 14, 2008
author : AMSSM
comments : 0
At the age of 44, I am experiencing extreme pain in my hip. I have been trying simple stretching and have found no relief.
 
date : January 29, 2006
author : Team BT
comments : 0
I started the Beginner Triathlete training program in earnest after Chinese New Year. I viewed the distances in the peak week with trepidation - how on earth would I manage it?