General Discussion Triathlon Talk » you know you're are a triathlete when!!!! (Great Read) Rss Feed  
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2006-09-14 12:37 AM

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Subject: you know you're are a triathlete when!!!! (Great Read)
You know you're a triathlete when.....

When asked, how old you are you answer 35-39.

Your idea of a great b-day is to run your age in miles with a couple of
friends.

Your idea of e great date is to go for a 10 mile run with your date.

You try to impress girls with your marathon time after swimming 2.4
miles and biking 112 miles.

When asked how long your training was today you answer: three to four
hours.

Your training is more limited by available time then how far you can
run.

Your first thought when you wake up is how high your rest HR is.

You go for a run event although there's a thunderstorm and you enjoy being
wet and dirty.

You think an Ironman is easier then a Marathon because you don't have
to start by running fast.

You think it's natural to do your 'business' behind a tree in the
woods.

Nobody believes you when you say 'Never again'.

You take part in the corporate challenge to improve your base speed.

You go for a 5 km cool down run after a 5 km race just so that you can
call it a training session.

You consider work, regeneration time between training sessions.

You co-workers don't ask you if you're going to train this weekend, but
how long and how far.

You have a water bottle when you drive your car.

You spend your 2 weeks annual vacation at a training camp.

During the vacations, when everybody else is partying, you go to sleep at
10:00 pm because you're going for a long ride the next day.

You know inside out how much Protein each energy bar has.

You seriously consider applying for citizenship in Tonga, Jemen or Tschad
so that you can participate in the Olympic games.

When people praising you for being able to run 15 miles you're feeling insulted.

In the summer your legs are smoother then your girlfriend's.

Your kids grab water bottles and energy bars when you suggest a family
stroll.

Your wife is not worried if you left for your run 2 hours ago.

You need a picture for a job application and you only have race
pictures.

You use running T-shirts to clean your bike.

You are up everyday by 5:00 am, but never in work before 9:30 am!

That charming "cologne" you wear to work is chlorine

You take more showers in a locker room than at home

6:30 am is sleeping in

The dog runs and hides when you get the leash!

You think there are only two seasons during the year, racing and off.

You can't change the oil in your car but you can completely rebuild
your bike in 45 mins

you spend more $ on training and racing clothes then work clothes

you spend 7 days going to 8 stores in 4 malls before buying a pair of
running shoes but you take 1 afternoon to go to 1 car dealership and
walk out with a new car 4 hours later.

When you see some lady watering her flowers and ask her if you can
borrow the hose for a minute so you can fill up your water bottles.

You clean your bike more often than your car

Your car smells like a locker room.

You tell your co-workers that you are going to "do a long brick" on
Saturday and just expect that they know what you are talking about.

When a co-worker asks if you are racing this weekend, you say "yeah,
but I'm just running a 10K, so that is not REALLY a race".

You have more water bottles than glasses in your cupboard

You consider you bike saddle your "couch"

You consider Clif Bars as one of the four food groups

You are sick to your stomach at 2:00 in the morning and check the back
of the Pepto Bismol bottle for caloric content and grams of carbohydrates,
fat and protein.

you have plenty of water bottles, safety pins, and t-shirts.

you have trouble keeping lunch under 2000 calories.

you usually wake up at 4:00 in the morning but do not get to work until
way after 9:00.

your bed-time reading on your night stand consists of a pile of: DeSoto
catalogs; InsideTri; Triathlete, VeloNews, USMA Swim, etc.

You haven't bought work clothes in two years, yet you own bike shorts
made by every manufacturer under the sun and can recite the merits of
CoolMax, Supplex, etc. in your sleep!
your car has at least one Power Bar wrapper and two sets of work out
clothes!

Your laundry continually smells like someone locked the cat in
overnight...

you wave at other cyclists, because all triathletes are friendly and if
they are not, they are probably purist cyclists trying to get into
triathlons and they do not know that triathletes are friendly.

you can't decide what tee shirt to wear to your next race.

you no longer take vacations but weekend triathlon junkets.

you have far more pairs of shoes in your closet than your non-tri wife
does in hers

the one "suit" you own has a QR on the chest.

you're tempted to do your long rides in a speedo so that you don't have
a
stupid tan for your next race.

your bath towel is never dry.

you bring bottled water to a party so that you're properly hydrated for
the next morning's long run, everyone else at the party also brought
their own bottled water because you don't have a social life outside of
triathlon. Oh yeah, and they all showed up by 7 pm and left by 10 pm.

your company announces mandatory unpaid shutdown days - every other
Friday throughout the summer - in order to cut costs and stay in
business, and your response is "Great - now I can do two long workouts
on
the weekends and still have an easy day."

somebody hands you a cup of water and you have to restrain yourself
from
pouring it on your head.

you forget that talking about daily LSD [Long Slow Distance] and speed
weirds some people out.

you have no FRIGGIN idea what to do with yourself on your off day.
Damnit, I mowed the lawn, cleaned the house, washed the car, and
there's
STILL 4 hours of daylight left! Aarrgghh!

you return from your *Mini-vacation* more exhausted than before you
left!

you feel like you took the day off because all you did was swim 3000
yards.

You get done with a hard workout and drink a recovery drink while on
the
toilet and in the shower.

At any given moment you know exactly where your heart rate monitor and
your swim goggles are, but cannot remember where you left you car keys.
(turns 90% of the time they are in your bike bag

When non-racer friends tell you they ran/rode you automatically
calculate
their pace to see if you're still in better shape.

Cars pass you on the road when you're driving and you either drop back
to
get out of draft zone or speed up to attack!

Cheers

Greg


2006-09-14 12:50 AM
in reply to: #540556

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Regular
97
252525
New Zealand
Subject: RE: you know you're are a triathlete when!!!! (Great Read)
"you usually wake up at 4:00 in the morning but do not get to work until
way after 9:00. "

So true!!

Love it- thanks for the laugh.
2006-09-14 3:31 AM
in reply to: #540556

Member
14

Auckland
Subject: RE: you know you're are a triathlete when!!!! (Great Read)
Yes, great read and I recognise myself in far too many!
2006-09-14 6:54 AM
in reply to: #540569

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Champion
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Henderson NV
Subject: RE: you know you're are a triathlete when!!!! (Great Read)
I love this
2006-09-14 7:48 AM
in reply to: #540556

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Champion
5529
500050025
Nashville, TN
Subject: RE: you know you're are a triathlete when!!!! (Great Read)
Well done and SO accurate on many points.  Yes...my friends try to understand but my coworkers think I am insane!
2006-09-14 7:59 AM
in reply to: #540668

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Expert
1274
10001001002525
Houston, TX
Subject: RE: you know you're are a triathlete when!!!! (Great Read)

 


ADollar79 - 2006-09-14 7:48 AM Well done and SO accurate on many points. Yes...my friends try to understand but my coworkers think I am insane!

 

That is the fun part! 



2006-09-14 8:55 AM
in reply to: #540556

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Champion
6931
5000100050010010010010025
Bellingham, Washington
Subject: RE: you know you're are a triathlete when!!!! (Great Read)
The dog runs and hides when you get the leash!

Mine does the opposite, he finds his collar and goes ballistic.
2006-09-14 1:35 PM
in reply to: #540556

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Veteran
183
100252525
Grand Rapids, MN.
Subject: RE: you know you're are a triathlete when!!!! (Great Read)
You forgot that: You think of Ibuprofin as "Vitamin I". Loved the read thanks.
2006-09-14 2:39 PM
in reply to: #540556

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Veteran
259
1001002525
Maryland
Subject: RE: you know you're are a triathlete when!!!! (Great Read)
Great post. My first tri was to be Saturday, (nation's tri) but the swim was cancelled. It is now a duath. I immediately had to find another race to do (Gen. Smallwood on the 30th), so that I can call myself a triathlete and FINALLY put the swim-bike-run sticker on my truck bumper.

Larry
2006-09-14 3:12 PM
in reply to: #540556

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Master
2060
20002525
Northern California
Subject: RE: you know you're are a triathlete when!!!! (Great Read)
Only 3 of those apply to me. Does that mean I am less of a triathlete?
2006-09-14 6:39 PM
in reply to: #540556

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Extreme Veteran
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Guelph
Subject: RE: you know you're are a triathlete when!!!! (Great Read)
Great .. great post, i've been at this just over a year and alot of this is me already and I can see more of it on the horizon. Made my nightLaughing


2006-09-14 8:44 PM
in reply to: #540556

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Expert
1023
1000
Malvern, England
Subject: RE: you know you're are a triathlete when!!!! (Great Read)
Great post. Very funny....and the sad thing is I had to resist asking my hubby to read through it 'cos he just wouldn't understand.

Jackie
PS My dog loves to come out with me but after about an hour she isn't pulling anymore and occasionally looks up at me with a sorrowful "is this nearly over" look.
2006-09-14 9:48 PM
in reply to: #540556

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New user
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2525
Subject: RE: you know you're are a triathlete when!!!! (Great Read)
You have a water bottle when you drive your car.

You can't change the oil in your car but you can completely rebuild
your bike in 45 mins

you spend more $ on training and racing clothes then work clothes

You clean your bike more often than your car

You have more water bottles than glasses in your cupboard

You have plenty of water bottles, safety pins, and t-shirts.

When non-racer friends tell you they ran/rode you automatically
calculate their pace to see if you're still in better shape.


Okay...so I'm sorta, kinda on my way to being a triathlete, right???
2006-09-14 10:31 PM
in reply to: #540556

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Champion
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Henderson NV
Subject: RE: you know you're are a triathlete when!!!! (Great Read)
The worst part is I am new (really new) and I saw 3 women riding and I was watching their Cadence.
2006-09-14 11:01 PM
in reply to: #542009

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Extreme Veteran
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100100100
Geneva, Illinois
Subject: RE: you know you're are a triathlete when!!!! (Great Read)
"You know you are a triathlete, when you go to family reunions to pick up chicks...."

Oh wait!...sorry, wrong type of list!

Yes! Those are all so true, exagerated, but cool!
2006-09-15 6:47 AM
in reply to: #540556

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Member
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25
Subject: RE: you know you're are a triathlete when!!!! (Great Read)
"You have no FRIGGIN idea what to do with yourself on your off day."

I'm not a triathlete yet, but this is true for me. Some days I just can't stand to rest and have to go for a jog or something.


2006-09-15 11:13 AM
in reply to: #542009

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New user
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2525
Subject: RE: you know you're are a triathlete when!!!! (Great Read)
The worst part is I am new (really new) and I saw 3 women riding and I was watching their Cadence.


Dude, we all do that.

I've been riding since I was 12 (really riding...training for organized rides riding; also at the age where guys should be much more important than bikes) and I couldn't tell you if I was passing a guy or a girl on a bike, but I could tell you what kind of bike I was passing, what components s/he was riding and whether or not the rider stood a chance at feeling good at the end of the ride (you know, based on form, perceived exersion, all that). Yeah, I was 12.
2006-09-15 12:27 PM
in reply to: #540556

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Pro
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Evanston,
Subject: RE: you know you're are a triathlete when!!!! (Great Read)

Ooh, one of my best dates this year was a 5 mile run.  The thought of a 10-mile run date give me shivers. 

2006-09-15 12:50 PM
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Champion
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Chicago, Illinois
Subject: RE: you know you're are a triathlete when!!!! (Great Read)
yeah. I got a girl coming in but nothing in happen because she wants to Qualfy for the Olympic trails.

You also forgot when you go to Las Vegas but staying out late to you is 8 pm.

When you have to run a 5k and you say you would feel better about it if you swam .5 miles and bike 12.5 miles before it.
2006-09-15 12:51 PM
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Pro
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MAC-opolis
Subject: RE: you know you're are a triathlete when!!!! (Great Read)

Your training is more limited by available time then how far you can
run

So true.

2006-09-15 1:44 PM
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Expert
1148
100010025
NW Suburbs, Illinois
Subject: RE: you know you're are a triathlete when!!!! (Great Read)
Very good. I liked it a lot. I think I am in the 65-75% range on which ones apply to me....or Zone 1, if you will....heheeheee


2006-09-17 6:00 PM
in reply to: #540556

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Expert
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Springfield, MO
Subject: RE: you know you're are a triathlete when!!!! (Great Read)

What about spending too much time on BT

Love it.  Thanks for a few laughs.

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