Can men & women be friends? (Page 3)

lol - no, buck, we can be friends, too. I was just pointing out that equation is a little different when the sexual orientations are different.

AMEN

One of my best friends in this world is a girl.  She also happens to be one of my wife's best friends.  I think she's attractive, and I haven't the slightest inclination to take that any further (were I single, of course).

You guys who say it's not possible are simply wrong.  YOU may not be able to be friends with the opposite sex, but that certainly doesn't mean that others can't.

I have a handful of female friends, who I ride with, work with etc. And none of em have led to an uncomfortable confession of love. It is possible. Just stop sending teasing the poor guys.

Yes, I think men and women can be friends.  I'm in my 20s, so it's probably a lot common for someone of my age group to have friends of the opposite sex than say someone in their 50s for instance.  And in fact, I think it's fairly common, especially when you consider how many women have gay male friends- it seems to be very common from what I've seen. 

In my main group of non-tri/running friends, there are both guys and girls, probably more guys then girls.  Some of the guys are gay and are friends with the straight guys without there being any issues.  But most of us have worked together in the past, seeing each other at not always our best moments at times, so our particular relationships may be slightly differently, viewing each other more on the brother/sister side, than the potential boyfriend/girlfriend side which changes things.  But even among my running/tri friends (who tend to be a bit older and some of those are married), I've got friends that are guys and there are no problems that I can see in that group.

Courtney, your scenario is quite different than "just friends." Your situation is with an ex. You have some sort of physical past with him. I think a lot of the responses you received were from people who were talking about friendships with people with whom they had no physical past.

Still, I maintain that you can be friends. I was in love with a man for 3 years; I eventually let that go, moved on, got married. I counted him as one of my closest friends. It helps that we were FRIENDS first, and romantic interests second. I really valued him as a friend above all; I respect him a great deal. A second scenario is my ex-husband, to whom I was married for over 10 years and tried to have children with. He was my family. It took us a long time - years - but we are now good friends again. Of course, we were each other's best friend when we were married so it's not such a stretch that we could rebuild the friendship once we got through the grief of our lost marriage.

Glad you were honest with yourself. In the past when I reflect on my actions I then realize how I could have been misleading to some people. It is just some people can't let go emotionally and it doesn't help when the other end seems interested. Hell, about two years ago my wife would get calls from an ex-girlfreind of mine sking her if I was happy etc etc. This was after we had been broken up for FIVE years. Talk about psycho. Found out that another ex had a very hard time with me getting married. She had a nervous breakdown. I always did attract the weirdos. Bottom line, if I were to talk to them at all, via IM, email, phone etc., they would think I cared and they wouldn't want to be just friends. Alot of people have hidden agendas, especially when it come to opposite sex relationships. The writing is usually on the wall, it's a matter of comprehending it. Trust your feelings and learn from your past.

No offense, but the one common denominator in all these situations is you.  Maybe you are attracting the wrong kind of people.  I find that easier to agree to then to blanketly state that men and women can or cannot be friends.  Perhaps it's better to ask, "Can I be just friends with a guy".  Just sayin.....

Maybe CL's just irresistable?

I have waaay more guy friends then girl friends....My best friend is a guy, married with a baby.  His wife and I are friends too, but when I call...and she answers..she alsways gets him for me to talk to first.  I actually think it's easier to be friends with a guy than a girls. Girls can be caddy and bitchy.  Guys are typically straight up and I can be straight up with them with out feeling like I am gonig to hurt their feelings.  Although, I am thinking I am done with adding more guy friends to my group....sometimes it is nice to have a girlfriend around.

As far as friends with ex's...it's possible, but I think there needs to be a seperation time..like a year..then you can be friends

Karma baby. karma.