Pleasant Prairie Triathlon - International Race - TriathlonOlympic

Well this was my first race since taking swim lessons from our Canadian intern who was a participant in the Olympic time trials. She must be a good teacher because this was an Oly swim PR by 4 minutes. And that's after four lessons.

I found it crazy that when you're an MOP swimmer, and not a BOP swimmer, that there's very little room to maneuver as the wash was unending.

Through the first leg I didn't take a stroke without hitting someone. On the back stretch, it opened up a little but I couldn't navigate to save my life. I was zig-zagging all over the place.

The third leg I tried as hard as I could to pee. The mind said `yes' but the body said `no!' WTF? I can always pee in Lake Michigan but not in a nice little lake. Maybe it's because it's called `Pleasant Prairie' and that would be `unpleasant.' Then again its initials are `PP' so it's practically BEGGING to be peed in.

Pee. Or as the kids say `Make water yellow.' Or is it just `make water?' I don't know what the kids say these days!

All in all a good swim but I KNOW I could've gone faster.

Not sure WTF happened here other than my wetsuit got caught on my heel. I don't know why but I've had some issues getting my wetsuit off lately, and that's not a euphamism. I tried to put my helmet on over my swim cap and goggles, but remembered I didn't actually NEED the goggs for the bike or run, despite the rep.

Hey I was trying to actually race for once instead of have fun. This isn't fun, people, it's triathlon! And as soon as I realize that, the better off we'll all be!

Get a wetsuit that melts in water. Like that swimsuit that you can buy for your ex-girlfriend to embarrass her. And not try to wear my swimcap on the bike.

Oh boy. Well I've been doing this for a few years, about four to be exact, and to date I've not wrecked in a race. That streak almost ended today.

As I was coming down a hill into a 90-degree turn at about 28 miles an hour, I got on the brakes a little. Whoops. The back end came out on old, slick tires and I was basically doing a Tokyo drift of which even my homies in the motherland would be proud. I let out a `OHHH FRICK!' and decided to head for the grass.

I took out a cone and went straight into a ditch. I angled the bike a little to avoid hitting the bottom of the ditch head on. I went in and came out and actually jumped the bike a little, went through the yard, still doing about 20 by this time, got to the front of the house jamming the brakes the whole time and sliding to slow down, ending up back on the driveway doing about 8 miles an hour. I looked back and, after doing a mental check as I was worried that I'd just messed myself unintentionally, started pedaling again down the driveway and back out onto the road.

I felt somewhat rockstarish as the cops and the volunteers at the intersection were cheering for me and someone let out a `NICE SAVE!' I caught the riders who'd ridden by when I was doing my best rally-race imitation and one lady said `I'll admit it, I thought you were going down. I was impressed by your balance.' or something along those lines.

I said `That made my anghole pucker like you wouldn't believe.'

Good lawdy I'm KLASSAY!

Not try to die. Oh and I lost my chain at one point and after about 60 seconds of trying to get it on while riding, I just jumped off the bike and put it back on. I suppose I'd do that again. But I should learn to do rolling rechains better.

Haha I got into T2 and ran right by my rack. I ended up having to go over two grassy knolls to get back to my rack. I'm a frickin' idiot. Anyway I just about ran out of T2 with my helmet on. WTF!?

Remember that I was in the FIRST FRACKING RACK!

My first race using my new Garmin 305. It helped keep me on pace. My goal was simply to track down Crowny. At about mile 0.75 I saw Wave who told me Crowny'd been at mile 1 about 4 minutes prior. I was thinking ... `No way you're catching him.' but I figured WTF I might as well try. So I tried to maintain a 7:20 to 7:30 pace. I crossed mile 1 marker and a few minutes later saw Crowny going the other way. He looked strong. I was sure he was uncatchable. Went down and back and made my way over to the other side of the lake, where it was like an oven. Ouch. I thought at one point `Gee I was hoping for heat because I handle heat better than most, but dayum, this is ridonkulous. Haha ridonkulous. Donkey. Haha. Eeeawww.' Finally made it to the mile 4 marker and saw Crowny again. I knew at that point I was going to catch him so I left the people I'd been pacing and took off after him. At mile 5 I caught him. He said `Go PR.' Crowny truly is a classy dude, despite what Mrs. Crowny says. ;)

Got to the mile 6 marker and ran the last 0.2 at about a 6:04 pace, according to the Garmin. Crossed the finish line and saw that it said 2:40:XX so I knew it was a 2:34:XX. I was happy that it was a PR.

I'd like to have broken 45 on the run but I'll take this what with the heat and such.

Got a bottle of water, a cold towel, chatted up Wave, saw Crowny finish, talked to him and Mrs. Crowny. Saw DonnaWiz, PJGrande, BScharff and a couple other people.


The fact that I had to pee the whole race since I couldn't unleash the fury in the water. I need to work on that ahead of IM because I don't want to do any bladder damage. And the heat was kind of crappy. The wind on the ride was suckage and of course trying to MTB on an TTB was unwise.


This is a well-run, fun race. They could've had a couple more shuttle buses but all in all it was done very well. I enjoyed it again and it was good to see my fellow Donks. EEAWWWW!!! OK that was long-winded. I need to go practice peeing in my wetsuit and turning corners at 28 miles an hour.