Age Group National Championship - Sprint Distance - Triathlon

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Milwaukee, Wisconsin
United States
USA Triathlon
Total Time = 1h 31m 44s
Overall Rank = 920/1099
Age Group = 35-39
Age Group Rank = 32/38
Pre-race routine:

I hope you're sitting down for this, because it's going to be long... though your butt might get numb, so you might want to read this in stages and take a break somewhere, go get something to eat, maybe visit the loo, and come back when you're ready to lose any feeling in your legs again.

Firstly - this was an AWESOME weekend. I mean, seriously awesome. The race itself totally sucked big hairy donkey balls for me, but everything else about the weekend was fan-freakin-tastic!!

It actually all started off on Thursday when Salty (Adrienne) got into town and we headed to the Bad Happy Poutine place in Chicago... and with our own bottles of vino (beer for Salty) as it's a BYOB place. OMG - it was SO freakin' good. A plate of fries covered in cheese curds and smothered in gravy. I'm pretty sure I took in my entire caloric intake for the week on that one plate. Well, after the bottle(s) of wine and the poutine - we had to hoof it to get her to the boat dock in time for her architecture tour. Let's just say that wine & poutine & running aren't the best mix... and Tony and I took the speed waaaayyy down for the walk home.

Friday I had to work (booo!) and then took the train up to Milwaukee to meet up with Salty and Switch (Elesa) for a drink or two and the biggest plate of nachos anyone has ever seen. People took pictures of this thing, a bridal party came in to take a look, the server didn't even know that the thing came in 2 sizes... it was epic. And getting to meet both Salty and Switch was just the beginning of the fantasticness.

Chris Gregg (cgregg) showed up at the bar just as Switch had to leave, and the poor guy hadn't had a single thing to eat all day after a somewhat disastrous trip from Cleveland, through Chicago (I waved at random cars in the morning just in case one of them turned out to be him), almost getting run off the road, a busted bearing that needed to be fixed, and finally to Milwaukee for 8:30pm or so. The guy needed FOOD! BTers are a really great bunch of people and Chris is no exception - it was great to meet him, and I'm really glad he made it to Milwaukee safe and sound. Tony eventually showed up too for some eats and then it was off to the hotel to check in and get some sleep before getting up in the morning to see the Dumster part of the WhizzzDumps race the Olympic.

Yeaaaahhhh... so the hotel room was so small that you couldn't open the door into the room without hitting the bedside table, nor could you open the bathroom door without hitting the bedside table on the other side. Sigh, oh well, at least it was a place to sleep... or was it? Baby screaming starting at 4am made it clear that this hotel is not soundproofed. This went on for over an hour and a half before the people eventually got up and left the hotel room (I guess they were racing) with the now happy toddler chatting exceptionally loudly all the way down the hall. Finally, some sleep! Of course, this meant that I missed every single one of Whizzz's texts until about 8:15am when we opened our eyes again.

OH CRAP - it's 8:15!! So much for getting to the race early. Okay, first... coffee. Priorities here, people! And coffee is essential to life. Whew - Starbucks IN our hotel so no need to panic and then off to the race site where we find Whizzz, go yell for the Dumpster ever place we plausibly can, find Terri who is volunteering at one of the crosswalks, and chase wieners. No, I'm not kidding about the last one! I also got to see cgregg cross the line, Switch on the run and the Schmizers once Scott was done. There was also a Chrissy Wellington sighting, and we got to see Sister Madonna Buder cross the finish line, which was so inspiring.

Tony and I hadn't eaten ANYTHING all day (now 1pm-ish), so we made the executive decision (after not having any plans confirmed by this point) to go get some food and figure things out. Lunch done and we head back to the expo as that's where the car was and wander around for a bit before you're allowed to rack your bike for the sprint starting at 4pm..

OHMYGOSH... it's Chrissy Wellington and Sister Madonna Buder just standing around in a nearly deserted expo!!! Tony had done about 4 stories on Chrissy and British triathlon in general and so went to introduce himself which led into about a 15 minute conversation with the two of them and a couple of pictures... they were two of the most humble and gracious people I have ever had the honour to meet.

Next up on the BT meet and greet are the Crownys! David was doing his first race since crashing during a crit and needing surgery to put his shoulder back together, so this was going to be a great way to come back from that just 11 weeks later. We got everyone settled, picked up our race packets and free compression socks and started the drive to the Weningers!

Okay, so this is where the decision-making part of the weekend may have gone out the faching window. It was SO much fun to hang out with Clint and Terri & Amy Jo and Craig, and there was much silliness and a ridiculously big bottle of wine. Note to self... don't ever have dinner with a bunch of friends when they're not racing the next day. And don't ever believe them when they tell you to have more wine because "it's ONLY a sprint". And don't ever believe that you can have more wine because "Clint raced a half still drunk". These people are clearly evil as they are not racing the next day. ;)

We were in bed by 10:30pm, but the damage was done. I went to bed with the hazy knowledge that tomorrow wasn't going to go well, but it's okay, I mean, it's ONLY a sprint, right?? ;)

Event warmup:

I had absolutely NO appetite in the morning, so had coffee, a 5hr energy and figured I would have the Gu that I put into my transition bag before the swim... though as I'm taking everything out of my transition bag to set up... I can't find it! I was SURE I put it in the bag, but somehow I wandered off... great, so no food for the race. But that's okay, because it's ONLY a sprint, right?? ;)

Basically this came down to trying not to vomit, using the port-a-loo, and getting into my wetsuit.

I did jump into the water for a bit and did a couple of strokes, but that was about it. My tummy wouldn't have handled anything more than that.
  • 16m 29s
  • 750 meters
  • 02m 12s / 100 meters

Oh boy... where to begin... I guess at the beginning?

I was in the water, with my earplugs in place and my goggles on, looking up at the dock and I didn't even hear the announcements for the countdown so when the horn went off I had no clue - just that everyone else was swimming and I wasn't! Time to try and get down to business, so I went off like a shot and therefore got my heart-rate WAY too high and then was wondering how long it would be until I actually threw up in the water. I made it almost to the bridge when my goggles came off my face the first time... and I had to reach down into the water to try and grab them before they were lost to the deep forever. I slapped the goggles back on my face and put my head down to keep going.

Okay, now were down to business.... around the first rectangle buoy... and then the secon... nope. There go the goggles again. ARGH! What the EFF is going on?? Okay, slap the goggles on AGAIN and keep going.

I had so many thoughts of stopping, giving up, throwing up, and just caving. But I didn't... and I still don't really know why I decided to keep going other than the thought that I might finally, FINALLY beat Tony in a head to head race...
What would you do differently?:

Um... Let's see -

1) NOT drink a bottle of wine the night before a race?

2) Grab the correct goggles (turns out I grabbed Tony's by mistake - and his are a different size than mine)

3) NOT drink a bottle of wine the night before a race. This cannot be emphasized enough. Seriously.
Transition 1
  • 02m 53s

What the hell was I doing in here for almost 3 minutes? Baking a freakin' pie???

In actual fact, my wetsuit got stuck on my timing chip and when I went to go and put my left foot into my bike shoe it wouldn't go in... what the? Oh. Oh look. There's the Gu that I was looking for this morning. Awesome.
What would you do differently?:

Figure out how to get my wetsuit off faster, the Gu was just dumb.
  • 40m 25s
  • 20 kms
  • 29.51 km/hr

*Urp*... upset stomach....

I've been pretty damn happy with my biking most days... and then it all came off the rails this day. I had NO legs. I don't know where the hell my legs were, but they weren't on the bike with me.

By the time I hauled my butt out of the water and FINALLY got out of transition onto the road... there was NO ONE in front of me. I had no idea if I was even going the right way for the first 7 minutes or so, but I saw runners along the pathway that I was yelling "good job" to and got a few waves and smiles back at me - so that was nice!

Thankfully I finally got passed by someone so at least if I was going the wrong way, she was too! Heading up the first hill thing I saw Tony on the way back, and in my head made it my mission to reel him in... if I could actually hold anything down.

There was a LOT of dry heaving and burping (that almost turned into more than just a burp) on the bike. It took a while before I even wanted to risk trying some water for fear that it would just come right back up. Well, I eventually DID get some water down, and once I was okay with that, tried some Gatorade which was also tolerated.

I got passed a few more times like I was standing still, but still plodded on up and over the bridge and down the other side... and wait a second... is that Tony??? Why yes, yes it is - holy crap I need to try and find some speed SOMEWHERE!

I dug in and did the grind up to the top of the bridge where there were two paramedics who I thanked and said I was happy to be on the downhill when one of them said, "your husband says to slow down!!"...

Oh hell no - it's ON now Tony Goggs!!!
What would you do differently?:

1) NOT drink a bottle of wine before the race

2) NOT drink a bottle of wine before the race

3) NOT drink a bottle of wine before the race

Yep, I think that covers it.
Transition 2
  • 01m 40s

I know I lost some speed here - just feeling slow and couldn't get my butt in gear.
What would you do differently?:

NOT drink a bottle of wine the night before a race.
  • 30m 20s
  • 5 kms
  • 06m 06s  min/km

Just out of transition the Crownys were yelling for me to hurry up because Tony was only 40 seconds in front of me!!!

Okay, I know I had just run an average of 8:34miles for a 3.2 mile run the other day... surely I could do it again, right??? Oh yeah, that bottle of wine thing. Sigh.

I actually DID do the first mile in 8:34, (and saw Tony on the way out who told me that I had him) but then almost as soon as I passed that first mile marker I got a side stitch like I've never had before. The stupid thing brought me to a complete standstill twice trying to stretch/breath/any other method I've ever heard of to try and get rid of it. The second mile took almost the entire 10 minutes which really killed my morale as more and more people sped by me. Holy crap those 16-18 year olds are FAST!!

After the two bouts of the stupid stitch bringing me to a stop, I was tired of dealing with it... I did a bunch of deep breathing and had a number of people run past me giving me encouragement, and eventually... oh my gosh... it's the 3 mile marker!!! I need to get my run on if I have ANY hope of beating Tony because he's such a good runner that he would destroy me on the run.

Then the blissful sounds of the announcer came through and I knew I was close to being done - YAY! Just keep running... just keep running... I got passed a couple more times as I was chugging up the finishers chute, but I just didn't care anymore. I was DONE!!

What would you do differently?:

1) NOT drink a bottle of wine the night before a race

2) figure out how to not get a side stitch?

3) NOT drink a bottle of wine the night before a race.
Post race
Warm down:

No warm-down necessary... hydration and food yes, warm-down... no.

What limited your ability to perform faster:

Geez... haven't we covered this already??

Event comments:

The race was REALLY well run and I'll definitely be back next year for some redemption.

And there will never, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever again be a bottle of wine the night before a race. :)

Profile Album

Last updated: 2013-06-18 12:00 AM
00:16:29 | 750 meters | 02m 12s / 100meters
Age Group: 20/38
Overall: 748/1099
Performance: Bad
Suit: Sleeveless Orca
Course: Out and under the bridge trying not to hit the buoys or the docking thingys, keep to the left side of the sausage-looking buoy, a little rectangle action and then back on the right side of the sausage-looking buoy before dog-legging to the left and up the ridiculously steep swim exit with volunteers basically hauling you up the ramp as there's no way you'd be able to handle that on your own.
Start type: Deep Water Plus: Waves
Water temp: 70F / 21C Current: Low
200M Perf. Bad Remainder: Bad
Breathing: Bad Drafting: Bad
Waves: Navigation: Bad
Rounding: Bad
Time: 02:53
Performance: Bad
Cap removal: Below average Helmet on/
Suit off:
Wetsuit stuck? Yes Run with bike: Yes
Jump on bike: No
Getting up to speed:
00:40:25 | 20 kms | 29.51 km/hr
Age Group: 30/38
Overall: 865/1099
Performance: Bad
Wind: Some
Course: Crap - I don't even remember the course. We went out onto the road one way, up a hill, came back down and over a big-azzed bridge... then back over the big-azzed bridge before heading back into to transition.
Road: Smooth Dry Cadence:
Turns: Average Cornering: Average
Gear changes: Average Hills: Below average
Race pace: Hard Drinks: Not enough
Time: 01:40
Overall: Average
Riding w/ feet on shoes
Jumping off bike
Running with bike Average
Racking bike Average
Shoe and helmet removal Average
00:30:20 | 05 kms | 06m 06s  min/km
Age Group: 36/38
Overall: 997/1099
Performance: Bad
Course: On the pathways beside the lake - it was nothing but flat and *should* have been fast...
Keeping cool Average Drinking Just right
Post race
Weight change: %
Overall: Bad
Mental exertion [1-5] 1
Physical exertion [1-5] 1
Good race? No
Course challenge
Organized? Yes
Events on-time? No
Lots of volunteers? Yes
Plenty of drinks? Yes
Post race activities:
Race evaluation [1-5] 4