Joke for the Day

The SAS, the Parachute Regiment and the Police decide to go on a
survival weekend  together to see who comes out on top. After some basic
exercises the  trainer tells them that their next objective is to go
down into the woods  and catch a rabbit for their supper, returning with
it ready to skin and  cook.

Night falls.

First up - the SAS.
They don infrared goggles, drop to the ground and
crawl into the woods in formation. Absolute silence for 5 minutes,
followed by the unmistakable muffled "phut-phut" of  their trademark
silenced "double-tap". They emerge with a large rabbit shot  cleanly
between the eyes.

"Excellent!" remarks the  trainer.

Next up - the Para's.
They finish their cans of lager, smear
themselveswith camouflage cream, fix bayonets and charge down into the
woods, screaming at the top of their lungs. For the next hour the woods
ring
with the sound of rifle and machine-gun fire, hand grenades, mortar
bombs and blood curdling war cries. Eventually they emerge, carrying
the charred remains of a rabbit.

"A bit messy, but you  achieved the aim; well done", says the trainer.

Lastly, in go the  coppers.
Walking slowly, hands behind backs whistling Dixon of Dock Green. For
the next few hours, the silence is only broken by the occasional crackle
of a walkie-talkie  "Sierra Lima Whisky Tango Fanta One,  suspect headed
straight for you..." etc. After what seems an eternity, they emerge
escorting
a squirrel in  handcuffs.

"What the hell do you think you are doing?" asks  the incredulous trainer,
"Take this squirrel back and get me a rabbit like  I asked you five hours
ago!".

So back they go. Minutes pass.  Minutes turn to hours, night drags on
and turns to day.

The  next morning, the trainer and the other teams are awakened by
the police, holding the handcuffed squirrel, now  covered in bruises, one
eye nearly shut.

"Are you taking the piss!!??"  asks the now seriously irate trainer.

 The police team leader  nudges the squirrel, who squeaks:

"Alright, Alright, I'm a f*ckin'  rabbit!"