Actually, it's three bike lengths from their front wheel to your front wheel, so it's effectively 2. Really, it's not that hard - just hang back by about 10-12 feet, and you should be fine. Where it's a pain, especially in a long race, is when you come up on someone who's just a touch slower than you - say 17.4 mph instead of 17.5. Is it worth spending the energy to pass? Remember, when you pass, you need to do it within 15 seconds.
For me, the harder rule to remember is "overtaken". Basically, if you get passed, you are responsible for dropping back out of the draft zone. In this case, overtaken is defined as when the passing rider's front wheel passes your front wheel.
According to the USAT official at my last race, Overtaken is the cause of most fouls, especially in what he called the "macho" case. He said he sees it all the time - a guy's chugging along at a decent pace, when a female cyclists passes him. Guy gets a look on his face along the lines of "hell, I can't let this WOMAN pass me", and zooms ahead. But, because her front wheel passed his, he is at fault and gets a penalty. Remember, if someone is passing you, it's because they think they can ride faster. Give it a few minutes - if you need to pass back, you can do it later. And you'll probably be glad for the short rest.
Where it really hurts, too, is if you come up on a group of 5 or more riders who are all legally spaced 3 bikelengths apart. Technically, you can pass just the tail rider, and they have to drop back. Effectively, though, you wind up having to pass all five, and that can really take it out of you.
Bottom line, just ride your own race, and you should be fine. The officials are not out there trying to DQ people - they're just making sure we're not a peloton
(which, with aerobars, would be very dangerous
).