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Confronting the older generations
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 2005-07-19 8:57 PM |
Veteran  138   Aurora, CO |  Subject: Confronting the older generationsI participate on two forums, and this one is extremely positive.... the other one, however..... The music group I was in the summer of 2003 is not doing very well this year, and the forum is for alumni of that group (not allowed to participate after 21 years old). These people are just plain MEAN to each other. They bicker, argue, call each other names, nit-pick at the stupidest things. I know that these people want only the best things for the organization, but they are blinded by their love for the group. It's hard for me to say anything to most of these people, because most of them are in the older generation of alumni (from the 70's, which means they're about 55-60 now) and I'm very young comparatively. I feel like they won't take my ideas for change seriously just because I'm too young or whatever. I know that my ideas are good, and I know that everyone just wants what is going to make the organization stronger and more competitive in the future. How do I go about talking to these people? We're all just way too passionate about this group for our own good...... |
| 2005-07-20 10:01 PM in reply to: #202739 |
| Regular 83 Sunriver, Oregon | Subject: RE: Confronting the older generations I was a lot like the people you are describing and a came to understand that I was threatened by younger, more dynamic, effective people. Which is, of course, ridiculous  . When I am passionate about something now, I want someone better than me to challenge me and encourage me to grow and become better and hopefully this is how they would feel about you and your contributions. Yes, it's more difficult if they're younger and smarter but nearly everyone is younger than me these days and humility can really be a strength rather than a weakness. I would think that if you sat down with them and told them passionately your ideas, I think that your enthusiasm would be contagious. And if not, I imagine there are probably enough people who will be caught up in your enthusiasm that you may not need them. |
| 2005-07-21 6:33 AM in reply to: #202739 |
Expert 704 The High Plains | Subject: RE: Confronting the older generations Mekarual - 2005-07-19 9:57 PM (not allowed to participate after 21 years old). Sounds like you might be a part of DCI. Where did you march? I never had the chance to participate (always had to many other obligations) but I have several friends who marched 'till they aged out. One even come in second (or third, I can't remember which) in Snare Individuals when he was marching for Phantom 1995. Sadly, his father required him to attend a summer Business School after he graduated and he didn't get to march in '96, the year they won the whole thing (along with the Blue Devils, of course)! I know several members who've aged out of DCI and I don't have any problems talking to them. They're all very supportive of their respective corps, but like you said, they all have their own ideas about what needs to be done making everyone's opinion seemingly worse than their own. I hope you can figure something out! Steve Edited by sranney 2005-07-21 6:33 AM |
| 2005-07-21 7:26 AM in reply to: #202739 |
| St. Louis, MO | Subject: RE: Confronting the older generations I've been thinking about this, because I think it's important and what makes it more difficult is that it is in a forum format, as opposed to in person meetings, so one person can read a sentance wrong, and bickering can break out. Are the "guidelines for healthy dicussion" on their forum? If not, maybe you should suggest some. I bet if you were to express concern about the tone of the forum, you wouldn't be the only one who felt that way. Perhaps if the forum were more positive, some of those that are not as active, would be. This may be a way for you reset the tone of the group and allow more respectful exchange of ideas. If you can get the group involved in a culture change to not be so "mean" you'll have more buy in and not lose participation. What kind of role to alumni have in making the music group better? Is it just a place to bat ideas around, or do your ideas have outcomes? Maybe there could be a short survey about rediefining the forum and its purpose based on how the alumni can improve the group...be more action oriented. Otherwise, I would encourage you to speak your mind, offer new ideas and if they are shot down, ask for explanations on why they feel that way. Stay level headed. If someone angers you, don't immediately reply to their post but come back calm. And just remember, emails and forum posts can be easily misinterpreted because we miss out on all those no verbal cues. When I had concern about being a "squeaky wheel" in a work related coalition, my boss only encouraged me because the squeaky wheel gets heard. Be heard, and be respectful. Good luck! Sarah |
| 2005-07-21 11:49 AM in reply to: #203581 |
Veteran 138 Aurora, CO | Subject: RE: Confronting the older generations sranney - 2005-07-21 5:33 AM Mekarual - 2005-07-19 9:57 PM (not allowed to participate after 21 years old). Sounds like you might be a part of DCI. Where did you march? I never had the chance to participate (always had to many other obligations) but I have several friends who marched 'till they aged out. One even come in second (or third, I can't remember which) in Snare Individuals when he was marching for Phantom 1995. Sadly, his father required him to attend a summer Business School after he graduated and he didn't get to march in '96, the year they won the whole thing (along with the Blue Devils, of course)! I know several members who've aged out of DCI and I don't have any problems talking to them. They're all very supportive of their respective corps, but like you said, they all have their own ideas about what needs to be done making everyone's opinion seemingly worse than their own. I hope you can figure something out! Steve It is DCI, good job. I loved Phantom 95. I was in Blue Knights for three years (2000-2002) and Santa Clara Vanguard (2003) for my age out. It's not really the recent ageouts that seem to have this problem, it's the older alumni, those people that aged out in the 70's and early 80's. They are very passionate about the organization, as we all are, but some of their ideas about how to run the corps are extremely outdated and won't help the corps at all. It's really sad, it's like they're blinded by their own love. At any rate, I don't really know how to fix it, and being a part of the younger generation, I don't feel like my ideas or suggestions will be taken seriously even though they are good ideas. It's also hard to be involved too much, since I live in Denver now and the corps is obviously still in Santa Clara, CA. Thanks for the suggestions, guess I'll just keep plugging away and hope that someday I can make positive changes! (Wish I could move to California, hopefully that will happen in the next five years or so). |
| 2005-07-21 1:35 PM in reply to: #202739 |
| Philadelphia, south of New York and north of DC | Subject: RE: Confronting the older generations Mekarual - How do I go about talking to these people? Well, it may have been said about our baby boom generation: They use to be the new way Now they're the old way They just don't know it yet. (an imprecise quote from G.K Chesterton) |
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