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2003-10-09 4:02 PM

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Subject: 'normal' siblings? joe's weekly topic.

i am trying to build upon an intersting topic i heard today on NPR...and maybe get to know u all better.   - although definitely do not want to tick anybody off.  just helping us be a little more 'aware' of situations in life that one normally doesn't think about. 

r u a normal sibling?  definition of 'normal' = no big problems physically or mentally.

SO, with that defined, are u OR do you have a sibling that has an illness (physically or mentally)  that acts as a 'handicap' - mild to extreme - in coping with any aspect of life.  this 'illness' could also be brought upon by a physical trauma - accident.

that said, with respect to 'normal' siblings, do you or have you felt 'left out' - like your parents don't care and put all of their focus on the sibling that has certain problems?  do they think that since 'your normal' u can take care of yourself.  example....your sibling requires near constant attention for some reason or another and your parents just 'don't have time' to help u with your math homework....give u support on issues...etc?  like your problems r inconsequential compared to your sibling.  do u feel guilty that u r 'normal'.

OR it can be the other way around, the parents are embarrased (dads especially) about their kid with a 'handicap' and give the 'normal sibling' praise and all the energy. 

BEING A NEW PARENT and probably having a few rug-rats.  i am interested about this problem - as it can certainly happen to me.  also, i have a sibling with a certain mental disorder...my parents are not the least bit embarrassed by it and give her a lot of support in coping - while not neglecting my needs.  although this disorder did not happen till we moved out - so we were pretty much treated equally growing up.

how about u parents?  food for thought.  i guess, the main point i am taking home is - as a parent - even though u may be faced with a child with a certain disorder which requires a lot of care and energy, your other child still needs your attention too.

*let me know if u like the idea of a weekly 'intellectually stimulating ' topic...as triathletes, we must not just stimulate the body BUT we also have to nurture our mind, be aware of whats outside the box.*



2003-10-10 11:51 AM
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2003-10-10 2:10 PM
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Subject: RE: 'normal' siblings? joe's weekly topic.

balance...u mentioned it in the second paragraph...that is so important in life.  regarding training for my first tri, i was very 'unbalanced' with respect to family/freinds.  caused a lot of problems that i just did not 'get' at the time.  i think the very nature of the sport - trying to excel in 3 sports and having many self-imposed deadlines to meat goals, it is soo easy to get lost in your training and exclude others...just so u can get that 2 hour ride in.  a good winter topic i hope to address for an upcoming monthly article.

u know what lara...since u were the first to respond to this post...u get to come up with the topic for this monday....hehe.  (thats the rules....i swear.)

2003-10-11 12:42 PM
in reply to: #1144

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Subject: RE: 'normal' siblings? joe's weekly topic.
I think sharing how we maintain a balance in life would be motivating to others. Just hearing folks on the board tell about their circumstances, is more motivating than what I could have ever imagined.

Still Tri'n
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2003-10-11 11:41 PM
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2003-10-12 5:01 AM
in reply to: #1164

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Subject: if u get out of your...
homework this weekend, then i do to...right?


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