Other Resources Challenge Me! » Whips, Cattle Prods & Tiaras (Four-Is-More Challenge) Rss Feed  
Moderators: the bear, kaqphin, tinkerbeth, D001, k9car363, alicefoeller Reply
CLOSED
 
 
of 101
 
 
2008-09-06 11:35 AM
in reply to: #1622476

User image

MotoQueen
13195
5000500020001000100252525
Subject: RE: Whips, Cattle Prods & Tiaras (Four-Is-More Challenge)

Okay I go a day and half without internet and the team posts over 8 pages.  Great job on the post padding.  How is the challenge coming along?

 



2008-09-06 12:29 PM
in reply to: #1655001

User image

Champion
23360
5000500050005000200010001001001002525
Taser-World
Subject: RE: Whips, Cattle Prods & Tiaras (Four-Is-More Challenge)
This was posted by Lyssa, on the Horny Melons team thread. But definitely worth reposting on here....

Pocket Taser Stun Gun, a great gift for the wife. A guy who purchased his lovely wife a pocket Taser for their anniversary submitted this.

Last weekend I saw something at Larry's Pistol & Pawn Shop that sparked my interest. The occasion was our 15th anniversary and I was looking for a little something extra for my wife Julie. What I came across was a 100,000-volt, pocket/purse-sized taser. The effects of the taser were supposed to be short lived, with no long-term adverse affect on your assailant, allowing her adequate time to retreat to safety....??

'WAY TOO COOL! Long story short, I bought the device and brought it home.

I loaded two AAA batteries in the darn thing and pushed the button. Nothing! I was disappointed. I learned, however, that if I pushed the button AND pressed it against a metal surface at the same time; I'd get the blue arc of electricity darting back and forth between the prongs.

AWESOME!!!

Unfortunately, I have yet to explain to Julie what that burn spot is on the face of her microwave.

Okay, so I was home alone with this new toy, thinking to myself that it couldn't be all that bad with only two triple-A batteries, right?

There I sat in my recliner, my cat Gracie looking on intently (trusting little soul) while I was reading the directions and thinking that I really needed to try this thing out on a flesh & blood moving target.

I must admit I thought about zapping Gracie (for a fraction of a second) and thought better of it. She is such a sweet cat. But, if I was going to give this thing to my wife to protect herself against a mugger, I did want some assurance that it would work as advertised. Am I wrong?

So, there I sat in a pair of shorts and a tank top with my reading glasses perched delicately on the bridge of my nose, directions in one hand, and taser in another.

The directions said that a one-second burst would shock and disorient your assailant; a two-second burst was supposed to cause muscle spasms and a major loss of bodily control; a three-second burst would purportedly make your assailant flop on the ground like a fish out of water. Any burst longer than three seconds would be wasting the batteries.? ? All the while I'm looking at this little device measuring about 5" long, less than 3/4 inch in circumference; pretty cute really and (loaded with two itsy, bitsy triple-A batteries) thinking to myself, "no possible way!"

What happened next is almost beyond description, but I'll do my best...? ? I'm sitting there alone, Gracie looking on with her head cocked to one side as to say, "don't do it master," reasoning that a one- second burst from such a tiny little ole thing couldn't hurt all that bad. I decided to give myself a one-second burst just for heck of it. I touched the prongs to my naked thigh, pushed the button, and . .

HOLY MOTHER OF GOD, WEAPONS OF MASS DESTRUCTION!

I'm pretty sure Jessie Ventura ran in through the side door, picked me up in the recliner , then body slammed us both on the carpet, over and over and over again.

I vaguely recall waking up on my side in the fetal position, with tears in my eyes, body soaking wet, both nipples on fire, testicles nowhere to be found, with my left arm tucked under my body in the oddest position, and tingling in my legs?

The cat was standing over me making meowing sounds I had never heard before, licking my face, undoubtedly thinking to herself, "Do it again, stupid, do it again!"

Note: If you ever feel compelled to "mug" yourself with a taser, one note of caution: there is no such thing as a one-second burst when you zap yourself! You will not let go of that thing until it is dislodged from your hand by a violent thrashing about on the floor.

A three-second burst would be considered conservative?

SON-OF-A-... That hurt like **% !!! A minute or so later (I can't be sure, as time was a relative thing at that point), I collected my wits (what little I had left), sat up and surveyed the landscape. My bent reading glasses were on the mantel of the fireplace. How did they get up there??? My triceps, right thigh and both nipples were still twitching. My face felt like it had been shot up with Novocain, and my bottom lip weighed 88 lbs. I'm still looking for my testicles! I'm offering a significant reward for their safe return!! Still in shock!


P. S. My wife loved the gift, and now regularly threatens me with it.
2008-09-06 12:36 PM
in reply to: #1655001

User image

Champion
23360
5000500050005000200010001001001002525
Taser-World
Subject: RE: Whips, Cattle Prods & Tiaras (Four-Is-More Challenge)
kns57 - 2008-09-06 12:35 PM

Okay I go a day and half without internet and the team posts over 8 pages. Great job on the post padding. How is the challenge coming along?



Challenge? What challenge?

Oh! You mean the POST PADDING challenge. It's going great.

Um, no? You mean the "other challenge"???? Well, yeah. I suppose I need to get a workout in today, huh? Otherwise, you'll all going to start waving whips and tasers at me. However, I'd like to remind you that I DO have a cattle prod - and I've just recharged the batteries.


2008-09-06 3:23 PM
in reply to: #1655070

User image

MotoQueen
13195
5000500020001000100252525
Subject: RE: Whips, Cattle Prods & Tiaras (Four-Is-More Challenge)
D001 - 2008-09-06 12:36 PM
kns57 - 2008-09-06 12:35 PM

Okay I go a day and half without internet and the team posts over 8 pages. Great job on the post padding. How is the challenge coming along?

 

Challenge? What challenge? Oh! You mean the POST PADDING challenge. It's going great. Um, no? You mean the "other challenge"???? Well, yeah. I suppose I need to get a workout in today, huh? Otherwise, you'll all going to start waving whips and tasers at me. However, I'd like to remind you that I DO have a cattle prod - and I've just recharged the batteries.

 

Cattle prod won't save you from being whipped.  We can stand pretty far and still whip you.  And once we have whipped the cattle prod out of your hands we will run in with our tasers and do it for more than 3 seconds, like the dude posted.   

Oh wait, I can't threaten Dee, she is the evil one. 

Hi Dee

2008-09-06 8:00 PM
in reply to: #1622476

User image

Pro
4216
20002000100100
Sous Mon Diadème
Subject: RE: Whips, Cattle Prods & Tiaras (Four-Is-More Challenge)

Ummmm... I had to actually look down the page to find the thread.  UNACCEPTABLE!  I hope it's 'cause you're all out training or racing or something.

I guess I should consider updating the spreadsheet...

2008-09-06 8:22 PM
in reply to: #1655635

User image

Champion
23360
5000500050005000200010001001001002525
Taser-World
Subject: RE: Whips, Cattle Prods & Tiaras (Four-Is-More Challenge)
mila - 2008-09-06 9:00 PM

Ummmm... I had to actually look down the page to find the thread. UNACCEPTABLE! I hope it's 'cause you're all out training or racing or something.

I guess I should consider updating the spreadsheet...



Well, we ARE still in the lead for post padding, meaningful posts. But the other teams are getting very close. Therefore, there's only one thing to do:

POST FASTER!

Hm, now I'm torn between saying, "That is all" or "Carry on." Either will work, I suppose.


2008-09-06 8:24 PM
in reply to: #1622476

User image

Pro
4216
20002000100100
Sous Mon Diadème
Subject: RE: Whips, Cattle Prods & Tiaras (Four-Is-More Challenge)

Oh dear...

I just looked at the spreadsheet and I'm gonna need a moment... so I can write the rest in a separate post.

2008-09-06 8:33 PM
in reply to: #1622476

User image

Pro
4216
20002000100100
Sous Mon Diadème
Subject: RE: Whips, Cattle Prods & Tiaras (Four-Is-More Challenge)

My Dearest WCP&T Team Members,

The month is currently 20% complete.  This means you should be 20% done with your goals.  The team average right now is 14.3%.

FYI, 14.3% < 20%.  Did I mention recently I don't like to not win????

Therefore, I'm gonna need you to go forth and:
- swim
- bike
- run
- jump
- skip
- climb hills, rocks, the walls
- do inside, outside, upside down pushups
- complete the naughtyjanet Xfit workout
- be all flexi-bendy in yoga/pilates/body surfing... whatever
- get your lift on
- et cetera, et cetera

XOXO,
mila

 



Edited by mila 2008-09-06 8:37 PM




(naughtyjanetwhip.jpg)



Attachments
----------------
naughtyjanetwhip.jpg (3KB - 14 downloads)
2008-09-06 8:59 PM
in reply to: #1655702

User image

Champion
23360
5000500050005000200010001001001002525
Taser-World
Subject: RE: Whips, Cattle Prods & Tiaras (Four-Is-More Challenge)
mila - 2008-09-06 9:33 PM

My Dearest WCP&T Team Members,

The month is currently 20% complete. This means you should be 20% done with your goals. The team average right now is 14.3%.

FYI, 14.3% < 20%. Did I mention recently I don't like to not win????

Therefore, I'm gonna need you to go forth and:
- swim
- bike
- run
- jump
- skip
- climb hills, rocks, the walls
- do inside, outside, upside down pushups
- complete the naughtyjanet Xfit workout
- be all flexi-bendy in yoga/pilates/body surfing... whatever
- get your lift on
- et cetera, et cetera

XOXO,
mila



Wait. Naughty Janet Xfit workout?

Hm.

Well, it can't be any more painful than the "bendy" one you listed.


2008-09-06 9:03 PM
in reply to: #1655772

User image

Pro
4216
20002000100100
Sous Mon Diadème
Subject: RE: Whips, Cattle Prods & Tiaras (Four-Is-More Challenge)
D001 - 2008-09-06 9:59 PM
mila - 2008-09-06 9:33 PM

My Dearest WCP&T Team Members,

The month is currently 20% complete. This means you should be 20% done with your goals. The team average right now is 14.3%.

FYI, 14.3% < 20%. Did I mention recently I don't like to not win????

Therefore, I'm gonna need you to go forth and:
- swim
- bike
- run
- jump
- skip
- climb hills, rocks, the walls
- do inside, outside, upside down pushups
- complete the naughtyjanet Xfit workout
- be all flexi-bendy in yoga/pilates/body surfing... whatever
- get your lift on
- et cetera, et cetera

XOXO,
mila

 

Wait. Naughty Janet Xfit workout? Hm. Well, it can't be any more painful than the "bendy" one you listed.

I don't do Cross fit but I think the work outs have girly names so I made up my own 'cause I'm sassy like that.  I can't help it if Naughty Janet was the first name that came to me.

2008-09-06 9:08 PM
in reply to: #1655783

User image

Champion
23360
5000500050005000200010001001001002525
Taser-World
Subject: RE: Whips, Cattle Prods & Tiaras (Four-Is-More Challenge)
mila - 2008-09-06 10:03 PM

D001 - 2008-09-06 9:59 PM
mila - 2008-09-06 9:33 PM

My Dearest WCP&T Team Members,

The month is currently 20% complete. This means you should be 20% done with your goals. The team average right now is 14.3%.

FYI, 14.3% < 20%. Did I mention recently I don't like to not win????

Therefore, I'm gonna need you to go forth and:
- swim
- bike
- run
- jump
- skip
- climb hills, rocks, the walls
- do inside, outside, upside down pushups
- complete the naughtyjanet Xfit workout
- be all flexi-bendy in yoga/pilates/body surfing... whatever
- get your lift on
- et cetera, et cetera

XOXO,
mila

Wait. Naughty Janet Xfit workout? Hm. Well, it can't be any more painful than the "bendy" one you listed.

I don't do Cross fit but I think the work outs have girly names so I made up my own 'cause I'm sassy like that. I can't help it if Naughty Janet was the first name that came to me.



The Naughty Janet Xfit workout....

Sounds like something Blake would enjoy.


2008-09-06 9:16 PM
in reply to: #1655799

User image

Pro
4216
20002000100100
Sous Mon Diadème
Subject: RE: Whips, Cattle Prods & Tiaras (Four-Is-More Challenge)

D001 - 2008-09-06 10:08 PM  The Naughty Janet Xfit workout.... Sounds like something Blake would enjoy.

Yes, doesn't it though?  Fortunately (though he will see it as unfortunate) Blake is at 23.8% and therefore won't need additional janet-esque motivation.

2008-09-06 9:34 PM
in reply to: #1655799

User image

Champion
23360
5000500050005000200010001001001002525
Taser-World
Subject: RE: Whips, Cattle Prods & Tiaras (Four-Is-More Challenge)

Don't forget to update the team spreadsheet with your current totals tonight!

I'll be pulling the numbers tomorrow for a Challenge update.

Here's your Saturday Night Post Count Padding Update:

And they're off! With just 6 days into the Challenge, all three teams are already up to 35+ pages! Here are the post count challenge standings:


1st place in the post padding standings:
Team Horny Melons - 899 posts

With Yanti, Lyssa, Melissa and TinkerBeth on this team, well, no wonder they're called the Horny Melons.

And yes, there are PICTURES galore on this thread. (And you know how we all love those, right?) If they weren't called team Horny Melons, they'd be called "The Tri Hotties."

Stay tuned - there should be more pictures up soon. Something about a wetsuit, I think?



2nd place in the post padding standings:
Team Whips, Cattle Prods and Tiaras - 887 posts

They should really rename themselves Team Whips, Cattle Prods and TASERS. On this team, the chat is all about "motivation." Some people want to receive it. Others want to give it.

Speaking of "motivation," did you know that tasers come in pink? And camo? And leopard?

Yes, really - tasers come in leopard print. Mistress Mila, chief motivator of the WCPT team, has not only purchased one, but she now has the shoes and handcuffs to match!



3rd place in the post padding standings:
Team Post Padding - 873 posts

Despite being in 3rd place for post counts, they aren't behind by much. And this team is living up to its name, and never putting in a single post what can be split into a good four or five of them.

When not post padding, this team discusses cheesecake, wine and working out. Does anyone want to join them on a 12 hour run? Or a 2 mile swim? And tomorrow, we're hoping that Jen and Kristen get to "du the du."



From Challenge Central, we're off to a great start this month. Keep up the post padding - and maybe even work out every now and then!

Over and out - until tomorrow,
- Dee


2008-09-06 9:36 PM
in reply to: #1655813

User image

Champion
23360
5000500050005000200010001001001002525
Taser-World
Subject: RE: Whips, Cattle Prods & Tiaras (Four-Is-More Challenge)
mila - 2008-09-06 10:16 PM

D001 - 2008-09-06 10:08 PM The Naughty Janet Xfit workout.... Sounds like something Blake would enjoy.

Yes, doesn't it though? Fortunately (though he will see it as unfortunate) Blake is at 23.8% and therefore won't need additional janet-esque motivation.



Actually - Blake seems to want spankings. Perhaps we could just spank him as a reward for doing well.
2008-09-06 9:37 PM
in reply to: #1655001

User image

Extreme Veteran
395
100100100252525
San Diego
Subject: RE: Whips, Cattle Prods & Tiaras (Four-Is-More Challenge)
kns57 - 2008-09-06 7:35 PM

Okay I go a day and half without internet and the team posts over 8 pages.  Great job on the post padding.  How is the challenge coming along?

 



Oh My God ... a half day without internet .... the agony ...... are you Ok now?
I thought post padding was the challenge ......
2008-09-06 9:39 PM
in reply to: #1655840

User image

Champion
23360
5000500050005000200010001001001002525
Taser-World
Subject: RE: Whips, Cattle Prods & Tiaras (Four-Is-More Challenge)
jrcody - 2008-09-06 10:37 PM

kns57 - 2008-09-06 7:35 PM

Okay I go a day and half without internet and the team posts over 8 pages. Great job on the post padding. How is the challenge coming along?



Oh My God ... a half day without internet .... the agony ...... are you Ok now?
I thought post padding was the challenge ......


Well, of COURSE it is. But we're only in second place.

Of course, that may be partly my fault. I post padded wayyyyyyyy too much on the Horny Melons team today.

But - I simply had to. They were posting pictures.



2008-09-06 10:49 PM
in reply to: #1622476

User image

Champion
26509
500050005000500050001000500
Sydney
Subject: RE: Whips, Cattle Prods & Tiaras (Four-Is-More Challenge)
Wow Dee... I didnt evn realise there was an official post padding challenge going on... I think we MUST TRY HARDER!
2008-09-06 10:50 PM
in reply to: #1655841

User image

Champion
26509
500050005000500050001000500
Sydney
Subject: RE: Whips, Cattle Prods & Tiaras (Four-Is-More Challenge)
D001 - 2008-09-07 12:39 PM
jrcody - 2008-09-06 10:37 PM
kns57 - 2008-09-06 7:35 PM

Okay I go a day and half without internet and the team posts over 8 pages. Great job on the post padding. How is the challenge coming along?

 

Oh My God ... a half day without internet .... the agony ...... are you Ok now? I thought post padding was the challenge ......
Well, of COURSE it is. But we're only in second place. Of course, that may be partly my fault. I post padded wayyyyyyyy too much on the Horny Melons team today. But - I simply had to. They were posting pictures.

MORE pictures???? mmmm going to look... wont post... just look.... 

2008-09-06 10:50 PM
in reply to: #1655839

User image

Champion
26509
500050005000500050001000500
Sydney
Subject: RE: Whips, Cattle Prods & Tiaras (Four-Is-More Challenge)
D001 - 2008-09-07 12:36 PM
mila - 2008-09-06 10:16 PM

D001 - 2008-09-06 10:08 PM The Naughty Janet Xfit workout.... Sounds like something Blake would enjoy.

Yes, doesn't it though? Fortunately (though he will see it as unfortunate) Blake is at 23.8% and therefore won't need additional janet-esque motivation.

Actually - Blake seems to want spankings. Perhaps we could just spank him as a reward for doing well.

Maybe refuse to if he doesnt or something like that?

2008-09-06 10:55 PM
in reply to: #1655679

User image

Champion
26509
500050005000500050001000500
Sydney
Subject: RE: Whips, Cattle Prods & Tiaras (Four-Is-More Challenge)
mila - 2008-09-07 11:24 AM

Oh dear...

I just looked at the spreadsheet and I'm gonna need a moment... so I can write the rest in a separate post.

Sorry Mila.. I wa part of the problem as I hadnt updated the spreadsheet... its now up to date with 21.2% of my goal completed... 

All I need to go is get in the pool next week at least once and it will be MUCH higher!!!

2008-09-06 10:57 PM
in reply to: #1655675

User image

Champion
26509
500050005000500050001000500
Sydney
Subject: RE: Whips, Cattle Prods & Tiaras (Four-Is-More Challenge)
D001 - 2008-09-07 11:22 AM
mila - 2008-09-06 9:00 PM

Ummmm... I had to actually look down the page to find the thread. UNACCEPTABLE! I hope it's 'cause you're all out training or racing or something.

I guess I should consider updating the spreadsheet...

Well, we ARE still in the lead for post padding, meaningful posts. But the other teams are getting very close. Therefore, there's only one thing to do: POST FASTER! Hm, now I'm torn between saying, "That is all" or "Carry on." Either will work, I suppose.

Umm Dee maybe if yuo posted LESS in teh othe teams threads we would be further ahead... you COULD compensate by posting more here... 



2008-09-06 10:59 PM
in reply to: #1655635

User image

Champion
26509
500050005000500050001000500
Sydney
Subject: RE: Whips, Cattle Prods & Tiaras (Four-Is-More Challenge)
mila - 2008-09-07 11:00 AM

Ummmm... I had to actually look down the page to find the thread.  UNACCEPTABLE!

Im doing my best... but it seems Im talking to myself and everyone has gone to bed... or are out having a saturday night or something....

2008-09-06 11:07 PM
in reply to: #1654686

User image

Champion
26509
500050005000500050001000500
Sydney
Subject: RE: Whips, Cattle Prods & Tiaras (Four-Is-More Challenge)
eurydice79 - 2008-09-06 3:59 PM

Good morning team. I need to log in more often - whenever I come on here there are 5 new pages of posts to wade through!

I've been fighting a cold all week and unfortunately its gotten worse overnight so I don't think I'll be getting any workouts done this weekend (I'd planned a bike and a run). But I am confident that I can make them up once I feel better, its only the start of the month.

Have a good weekend everyone! Is is Father's Day in the US tomorrow? It is here, Sef & I are cooking up a big breakfast for our dads and grand-dads. Should be fun. I hope everyone else has a good weekend, happy training x o

Hope you had a great time!!! With no father in Oz to celebrate its mostly another day for me but that breakfast sounds awesome  

2008-09-06 11:09 PM
in reply to: #1654684

User image

Champion
26509
500050005000500050001000500
Sydney
Subject: RE: Whips, Cattle Prods & Tiaras (Four-Is-More Challenge)
eurydice79 - 2008-09-06 3:54 PM
tlnewman30 - 2008-09-06 2:15 PM
kaqphin - 2008-09-05 10:05 PM

tlnewman30 - 2008-09-06 1:57 PM Ok so I didn't get a workout in today, but I did go to the Denver Brew at the Zoo. Yes, exactly like it sounds, I went to the zoo to drink beer. I figure the rest day was needed anyways, plus since it was a long day at work, the exercise would have interferred with the brew zoo time.

So... i imagine thinks like giraffes nad elephants are REALLY entertaining after a few too many... 

Well they are entertaining anyways, but even more so the more you enjoy the brew.  It was loaded with 40+ brewerys.  I have never seen so many different kinds for beer on tap before.

 

I *heart* beer very very much! Belgian beer is the best. And boutique brewery stuff too. We used to brew our own, but we ended up making waaaay too much last year and we're still drinking our way through it *lol*

No such things TOO much is there? Just ask for help and Im sure a few friends would offer.... 

2008-09-06 11:09 PM
in reply to: #1622476

User image

Champion
26509
500050005000500050001000500
Sydney
Subject: RE: Whips, Cattle Prods & Tiaras (Four-Is-More Challenge)

^^^ Ok thats my overnight contribution to our post count and staying at the top of the challenge forum....

Hope it helps!!! I cant beleive the weekend is almost over here

New Thread
CLOSED
Other Resources Challenge Me! » Whips, Cattle Prods & Tiaras (Four-Is-More Challenge) Rss Feed  
 
 
of 101