Depression and Moods- Check in! (Page 13)

ering305 - 2009-10-20 8:36 PM After a big race, how do you deal with the post-race blues that may set in afterward? I just ran my first marathon (4:17, very very proud/happy about it I must admit!) It was one of, if not the absolute best, moment of my life. Pushing myself beyond the limits, surrounded by other people doing the same thing, just touched me unbelievably, and I can't stop thinking about the magnitude of the race. My family was there, I saw my best friend who I hadn't seen in months cheering for me at mile 20, my dad followed me on his bike for a few of the last 10k miles...it was just an amazing moment. I plan to run many more. Now that it's over, I've been overcome with depression. Agh! I feel lonely, I miss my long runs (eventually I will start up again... but now just easing back with my recovery plan for the next 3-4 weeks), and I miss the race- the anticipation, the excitement, the nerves, everything. Whenever there's a great event, I tend to yearn for it immediately after... and this is the worst! I keep crying extremely easily, am worrying over little things again, am anxious I can't push myself hard in running workouts when I'm more motivated than ever to get better... also I think I'm still kind of grasping the concept that I ran 26.2 and making sense of the whole experience. Anyone experienced anything similar? How did you get back on the horse emotionally after the big race? How did you mentally process a big race? Thank you for your time and thoughts.

planningchick - 2009-10-24 6:26 PM I finished my first sprint tri two years ago and a half marathon last year. Then I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia. I suspected that I've had it for five years. But the stress in my life reached epic levels in the last year and it's taken me awhile to deal with it. So here I am at the end of the season, 30 pounds heavier and wanting to get back into training. Any sugesstions? Thanks for reading/listening.

Atlantia - 2009-11-08 8:11 PM Hi all. I was pretty active of BT in 06 & 07, and I've done a couple tri's. I got derailed from my marathon training in late 07, and I'm only just now getting back. The reason? Depression, anxiety, divorce, you name it. Thought this seemed like a good thread to in on if that's okay. I've gained a ton of weight (doesn't help the latent eating disorder) but I'm completely off of any meds. I decided I hate that foggy feeling. I was first put on medication when I was 13, and I'm 29 now. I feel like this past year, with getting out of a such a terrible marriage and my whole life changing, it was a good time to try healing through training. I don't really have the money to do triathlons right now, so its just running with some trainer rides thrown in. Guess that's it for my little introduction.

Atlantia - 2009-11-08 8:11 PM Hi all. I was pretty active of BT in 06 & 07, and I've done a couple tri's. I got derailed from my marathon training in late 07, and I'm only just now getting back. The reason? Depression, anxiety, divorce, you name it. Thought this seemed like a good thread to in on if that's okay. I've gained a ton of weight (doesn't help the latent eating disorder) but I'm completely off of any meds. I decided I hate that foggy feeling. I was first put on medication when I was 13, and I'm 29 now. I feel like this past year, with getting out of a such a terrible marriage and my whole life changing, it was a good time to try healing through training. I don't really have the money to do triathlons right now, so its just running with some trainer rides thrown in. Guess that's it for my little introduction.

TeddieMao - 2009-11-08 11:12 PM

Hey good to see you and getting back to BT.  I am actually in pretty bad spot right now but realize that I have to keep on going.  I too have to use training as mental and physical healing.  It's cheaper than meds!!  Which I would like to be off one day!!   I really hope that things go well and that you eventually get to do some tris!!  KEEP GOING!

blairrob - 2009-11-16 7:00 AM

Tri to keep that exercise going. I have yet to have a bike ride or a run yet that didn't make  me feel at least a bit better, and that includes the ones that cause road rash! Remember you have friends and support here, and if possible, try to get out and visit or talk to a good friend once in a while. They can be great pick me ups to.

      Blair

ChicagoMan65 - 2009-11-17 6:13 AM

Absolutely....just keep moving.  When I was in a bad bad place about 2 years ago, sometimes it was sooooo hard just to do anything.  Exercise is important sure.  Once I sat for 45 minutes in fromt of my locker at health club, trying trying trying to psych myself to go swim.  But it was like I was anchored.  Finally, over my internal objection, I forced myself into the pool.  It totally sucked.  250 yards later I felt better. Afterwards,  I was still in a pretty crappy place mentally, but it just wasnt quite as bad as before.  Only depressives can understand that.  

Atlantia, keep moving forward!  

sarahswhere - 2009-11-18 11:33 AM

This is where I'm at right now.  Up until two weeks ago I was training quite a bit and then I just couldn't do it anymore.  The only thing I looked forward to was going to work because I love my job and some of the people I work with.  Other than that, I can't seem to get anything done, much less get out of bed on my off days.  I've put my workout clothes on and kept them on almost all day trying to leave the house, but most days I end up back in bed.  It sucks.  Plus feeling a bit guilty that I don't just go do it.  Ugh. 

donna999 - 2009-11-19 9:23 AM Hello everyone
I am the friend that Itsast mentioned in his post, he talked me into doing this.  My soon to be ex is a constant poster on this site so I always felt too intimadated to post on here.  I was training for the Danskin when I met him and so excited about doing it and then during my first small training triathlon I almost drowned (I finished that race) but afterwards found out I had a small heart problem.  After that I was scared to push myself.  My counselor says that that is when the depression probably set in and my feelings of failure started.  I felt like I had failed myself and failed him.  I know that I had disappointed myself and I HAD to have disappointed him.  That was a big reason as to what had brought us together and it was gone. 

Since then I have felt so inadequate and havent been able to finish anything.  I had stopped exercising, stopped caring about how I look and just gave up on everything.  I have now lost everything important to me except for my daughter, including my husband and my marriage.  Depression is a horrible thing..   I had loved riding my bike so my plan is to start doing that again.  I have a ride already picked out for next September.  I cant swim now (and was the world's worst one anyway so am ok with it) so triathlons are out but wanted to do long distance biking so will go for that.  I have alot of weight to lose which luckily I have a head start on losing already from going through this horrible divorce.  The medication is helping, the exercises and homework the therapist has me doing are helping but..  I am still so horribly sad over what I have lost and will be for a long long time and my trust in everone except my daughters is zilch but someday I have hope that I will get to feeling better.  At least now I have this ride in September to look forward too.  
I am glad to see that there are others on here that are in similar situations and have risen out of it.  What a lifeline that is!

Atlantia - 2009-11-19 3:11 PM Being paralyzed by depression is the worst. I can remember times when I would try to go for a swim and never make it out of the parking lot. I just felt like I didn't belong, like I was just pretending to be a triathlete. I think the best part about this site, these people, and this sport is how nice and welcoming everyone is. I really think that having a support system is being held accountable for my workouts is better healing than any medication.

donna999 - 2009-11-19 11:23 AM Hello everyone
  I was training for the Danskin when I met him and so excited about doing it and then during my first small training triathlon I almost drowned (I finished that race) but afterwards found out I had a small heart problem.  After that I was scared to push myself.  My counselor says that that is when the depression probably set in and my feelings of failure started.  I felt like I had failed myself and failed him.