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Once I saw a dollar on the sidewalk.  I took a dollar out of my wallet and placed it next to the stranded bill to keep it company. 

I like to think that today, somewhere, there are two dollar bills keeping eachother company and talking about the people they have known, maybe with 2.5 pennies and a nice wallet in the suburbs....

A quarter pounder?

I love you.

I love you, Honey Bunny.

Any one of you f-ing pigs move, and I'll execute every mfing last one of you!

I don't dig on swine, that's all.  A pig is a filty animal that roots in its own fecees

So by that logic, would you considera dog a filthy animal?

I wouldn't go so far as to say that.  A dogs got personallity, and personality goes a long way...

So if a pig had personality, it'd be different?

It'd have to be one charming mf-ing pig,

I AM PAINTING A BEDROOM!!!  HOW COME NO ONE CAME TO HELP?? 

But do you like the color?

Fitmama,

You have discovered my achilles heel. The only fact about me that calls into question my sanity. People look at me and they see sophisticated, fit, smart, sexy black chic with the world at her fingertips. They marvel at my aplomb and salivate at my sauciness. But as soon as they find out that I am in love with Keanu Reeves, they reel back in disbelief and wonder how long I should be in the therapist chair. Some guffaw in aw, others cackle like rattled teens, but they all express such despair that alas I was too good to be true.

Ode to Keanu

I shuffle in all black, the reason

This, my friend, is mouring season.

My cavelier fake lover is about to wed

In spite of reality, I have his soft voice in my head

It lingers from the last time we spoke

When I treked through sleet and rain

Up to Canada to see the pain

On his face as he dolled out "Hamlet"

No, really, I did. It's not a joke.

In a small intimate theater I sat with

Teenagers and old folks alike

All riddle with esctasy, we saw him recite

Shakespeare's beautiful and undulating prose

In an "dude-like," nonchalant pose.

Or the time when I smelled his air and touched his body

In the middle of a Chicago hotel lobby

I swear it was just him and me

At the bar in Kansas City

When played with his rancorous band and I went too far

By throwing my undies at "Dogstar."

But the police were kind and nice

Hey, what's life without a little spice.

Oh Keanu thou name means gentle breeze

Don't get married now, wait for me!

LMAO!!!!

LMAO!!!!