Q&A with a medical professional regarding diet and training

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mbydalek

2008-03-08 8:01 AM

Veteran

187

Lutz, Florida

Subject: Q&A with a medical professional regarding diet and training

Q: I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life; is this true?
A: Your heart is only good for so many beats, and that's it... Don't waste them on exercise . Everything wears out eventually. Speeding up your heart will not make you live longer; that's like saying you can extend the life of your car by driving it faster. Want to live longer? Take a nap.

Q: Should I cut down on meat and eat more fruits and vegetables?
A: You must grasp logistical efficiencies. What does a cow eat? Hay and corn. And what are these? Vegetables. So a steak is nothing more than an efficient mechanism of delivering vegetables to your system. Need grain? Eat chicken. Beef is also a good source of field grass (green leafy vegetable). And a pork chop can give you 100% of your recommended daily allowance of vegetable products.

Q: How can I calculate my body/fat ratio?
A: Well, if you have a body and you have fat, your ratio is one to one. If you have two bodies, your ratio is two to one, etc.

Q: What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program?
A: Can't think of a single one, sorry. My philosophy is: No Pain...Good!

Q: Aren't fried foods bad for you?
A: You're not listening....Foods are fried these days in vegetable oil. In fact, they're permeated in it. How could getting more vegetables be bad for you?

Q: Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around the middle?
A: Definitely not! When you exercise a muscle, it gets bigger. You should only be doing sit-ups if you want a bigger stomach.

Q: Is chocolate bad for me?
A: Are you crazy? HELLO Cocoa beans! Another vegetable. It's the best feel-good food around! !

Q: Is swimming good for your figure?
A: If swimming is good for your figure, explain whales to me.

Q: Is getting in-shape important for my lifestyle?
A: Hey! 'Round' is a shape! !

Well, I hope this has cleared up any misconceptions you may have had about food and diets.

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newbie13

2008-03-08 8:14 AM

in reply to: #1260312

Extreme Veteran

555

Subject: RE: Q&A with a medical professional regarding diet and training

lol, that was great!

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mbydalek

2008-03-08 2:29 PM

in reply to: #1260312

Veteran

187

Lutz, Florida

Subject: RE: Q&A with a medical professional regarding diet and training

Glad I could help....hope this revolutionizes your training too!

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katybug34

2008-03-08 3:35 PM

in reply to: #1260312

Extreme Veteran

450

Upstate, SC

Subject: RE: Q&A with a medical professional regarding diet and training

Great! I'm turning in my racing shoes!

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sharp4850

2008-03-08 4:34 PM

in reply to: #1260312

Extreme Veteran

589

Fridley, MN, USA

Subject: RE: Q&A with a medical professional regarding diet and training

Dear God when I read that first answer I almot fainted! Hieracy!

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mbydalek

2008-03-08 8:13 PM

in reply to: #1260312

Veteran

187

Lutz, Florida

Subject: RE: Q&A with a medical professional regarding diet and training

I am now working on a theory of all the triathletes contributing to global warming by doing too much training and thereby dramatically increasing their carbon footprint by breathing heavier and exhaling massive amounts of CO2 into the atmosphere. I will title my docu-drama "An Inconvenient Brick"

More nap time will decrease global warming.

Edited by mbydalek 2008-03-08 8:38 PM

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kenaxford

2008-03-10 12:01 PM

in reply to: #1260312