THURSDAY FUNNIES

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tupuppy

2006-03-23 8:10 AM

COURT JESTER

12230

ROCKFORD, IL

Subject: THURSDAY FUNNIES

A mother and her very young son were flying Southwest Airlines from Kansas City to Chicago. The little boy(who had been looking out the window) turned to his mother and asked, "If big dogs have baby dogs, and big cats have baby cats, why don't big airplanes have baby airplanes?" The mother (who couldn't think of an answer) told her son to ask the flight attendant.

So the boy went down the aisle and asked the flight attendant. The flight attendant, who was very busy at the time, smiled and said, "Did your Mom tell you to ask me?" The boy said, "yes she did." "Well, then, you go and tell your mother that there are no baby airplanes because Southwest always pulls out on time. Have your Mom explain that to you."

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What is the difference between Mechanical Engineers
and Civil Engineers? Mechanical Engineers build
weapons and Civil Engineers build targets.

Three engineering students were gathered together
discussing the possible designers of the human body.
One said, "It was a mechanical engineer." Just look
at all the joints." Another said, "No, it was an
electrical engineer. The nervous system has many
thousands of electrical connections." The last one
said, "Actually it was a civil engineer. Who else
would run a toxic waste pipeline through a
recreational area

------------------------------------------------

The Why's of Men

1. WHY DO MEN BECOME SMARTER DURING SEX?

(because they are plugged into a genius)

2. WHY DON'T WOMEN BLINK DURING SEX?

(they don't have enough time)

3. WHY DOES IT TAKE 1 MILLION SPERM TO FERTILIZE ONE EGG?

(they don't stop to ask directions)

4. WHY DO MEN SNORE WHEN THEY LIE ON THEIR BACKS?

(because their balls fall over their butt-hole and they vapor lock)

(You're laughing, aren't you?!?!)

5. WHY WERE MEN GIVEN LARGER BRAINS THAN DOGS?

(so they won't hump women's legs at cocktails parties)

6. WHY DID GOD MAKE MEN BEFORE WOMEN?

(you need a rough draft before you make a final copy)

7. HOW MANY MEN DOES IT TAKE TO PUT A TOILET SEAT DOWN?

(don't know.....it never happened)

( C'mon guys, we laugh at your blonde jokes!)

And my personal favorite:

8. WHY DID GOD PUT MEN ON EARTH?

(because a vibrator can't mow the lawn)