Beach start? I've never practiced a beach start. Oh well, I'll stand near the back so I don't get killed by the real triathletes. When they said "GO!", I realized I was standing with Wave 2. I had to dart through people to catch up with Wave 1 and get in the water. I've read everyone's reports about sardines thrashing, so I was prepared to see an insane amount of kicking and hitting. I was surprised to see how long it took until it smoothed out and I could actually start swimming. I remembered to burp (I have a habit of swallowing air). Swimming into the sun sucks. I started passing people, which made me feel good. I found "the zone", and I remember thinking clearly for the first time that morning that this was cool. I was happy.

About 2/3 of the way through the swim, I thought we were all supposed to turn at a certain buoy. Nobody turned. I stuck my head out, and everyone kept swimming straight. I followed them, but I remember thinking that I must be on the international distance route. Who can swim this much, and then do 2 other legs? I ignored self doubt, and swam hard.

Actually, I feel really good about the swim leg. Dare I say I wouldn't change much? Maybe I would start closer to the front of the pack.

Coming out of the ater was a blur. I followed someone up the hill to T1 and did everything he did. Got to my bike, and I saw a lot of other bikes on my rack - a good sign. I put on my helmet before my shirt. Yikes! Luckily, my shirt stretched to fit over. For some reason I paused to take a drink of water from foot-cleaning bottle instead of waiting to drink from the bottle on my bike. Oh well. I shoved an unopened GU in my mouth to eat on the ride. I've never tried it before, but I decided it would be a good idea.

Not try to take a drink while in T1 - wait until on the bike. Don't put on helmet until after shirt. Practice more with race belt - it was my first time, and it cost me seconds.

The bike was very hard. My muscles hurt a lot. The hills were harder than when I practiced them a few weeks before. The major hill almost made me cry. I was just so desparate not to walk my bike up the hill.

The GU was too difficult to try to eat. I decided the best place for it would be just inside my tri shorts. Dumb - moving legs caused it to travel south. Those GUs have 4 pointy corners, making certain residents of my tri shorts unhappy. Moved it to the bike wedge. The ClifBar felt uncomfortable as well - I think nerves were cauing it to attempt to come back up.

I had incredible amounts of self-doubt while biking. I couldn't get negative thoughts out of my head. Why am I doing this? I'm not an athlete. This sprint is too hard - how could I dream of doing an Olympic? Why can't I go faster on hills? Shouldn't downhill be quicker? These people that are passing me are older than me. Who am I kidding? The thoughts were so strong, so powerful - they really did almost finish me off. It took everything in me just to keep pumping my legs. When I tried to talk about it after, it just made me cry. I've never felt so much self-doubt in my life. It was as if everything negative in my life was right there, riding with me. All the kids that ever made fun of me for sucking at sports. All the gym teachers that didn't care enough to try to help me when I struggled. The baseball coach that made fun of my .000 batting average when I was 7. The soccer coach that would never let me play. All of it - all the voices, all the memories - they all conspired to try to knock me off my bike. My training didn't matter. My improvements didn't matter. All that mattered was that I was doing something I wasn't good enough for, something I didn't fit in doing.

As I neared the transition area, I looked at my time. I had shaved off minutes. I cried. I had improved, even though I felt like I just finished the worst ride of my life. Somehow, maybe I didn't suck at everything. I screamed, "I'm awesome" twice, while pointing at myself when I went by my family. Later, they told me they thought I was telling them I lost a contact. Oh well!

I need to combat my internal conflicts. I need to find a way to understand my body better so that I can predict how I will feel on a hard bike course. I need to work on my curves.

This transition was easy, and I expected it to be. My legs actually felt better than I thought they would while running in the trans area. I was so ecstatic about my bike time.

I would like to practice dismounting my bike. Other than that, I rule.

My legs felt great. I was shocked. I hadn't done a real brick in weeks, but I still felt good. I felt slow at times and fast at times. After the first mile, I was pretty sure I was almost done. When I saw the Mile 1 sign, I was shocked that it had only been a mile. I pushed up the slight hill for mile 2. People were running back to the finish, which didn't help the self-doubt. My left foot started hurting about half way through from an injury I need to get diagnosed. I pushed through, and running through the finish line was a blur.

I'm rating this as average, but I'm not sure what I would change.

Cried, drank water.


Self doubt.


HFP did a very nice job.