Wandering eyes (Page 3)

Don't ask me.  I had a whiplash injury from walking on the beach at the Redneck Riviera.  It was great.

TW

Ha ha LOL, it would probably just come out really pixelated if you enlarged it

I think this is the best post in the entire thread.

If you told him that it bothers you when he does this in front of you and he still does it, what does this say about how he feels about your input?

Listen to your gut. You know something is wrong. If he doesn't listen to you now, will he listen once you are married?

I mean this respectuflly but I think your expectations are un-realistic.

Can you honestly say that you never look at another guy or girl?

He's with you becasue you caught his eye, heart and soul. Accept him for who he is or be frustrated.

Happy Holidays!!

This is why every man should wear dark, wrap-around sunglasses....love my oakley m-frames

I love it when you talk dirty!

Instead of saying he "notices beauty" he should reassure  you by saying your the only one he wants or something like that.

Honestly, we are both looking at the women. but I CAN appreciate a hot woman and we do talk about them together.

I knew he loved to look at women when I met him so it really doesn't bother me. Or is that because I'm looking too? *shrugs* doesn't bother me either.

Kinda like what Max said.  But we both think each other is the hottest so we don't care

Wow, this one's really interesting to me. I'm actually conflicted on how to respond so I'll just do a little brain barfing here.

On one hand, I'm bummed for the OP since she's discussed it with her SO and doesn't feel like she's seeing the change in behavior that she desires. Of course, we have no idea of the timeline, "severity" of the behavior, etc. But if there's one thing that disgusts me, its people who don't hold their relationship in high enough regard to do the work necessary to make it a successful one. 

On the other hand, I'm wondering how much of this can be chalked up to insecurity or divergent expectations or a combo of both. The statement that really stood out to me was "It feels demeaning, disrespectful, as though I'm not enough to hold his attention...". First, it doesn't sound like he's saying "wow, I'd like to get her naked" while you're out together. So how are you defining the demeaning part? Disrespectful I get since you've asked him to change his behavior. But feeling demeaned is in the eye of the beholder, so to speak. Second, and much more importantly, do you really expect to be able to "hold his attention" all the time when you're together? If you're honest with yourself, you probably couldn't say that he holds your attention 100% of the time. I guess what I'm getting at is the notion that a SO/spouse needs to be all things all the time to their partner. None of us can be that for anyone nor should we expect that. Doing so puts undue pressure on either ourselves or our SO or both.  

I once heard from a friend that "the key to a successful relationship is low expectations". When you think about that statement, its pretty true. Perhaps its even better stated as "no expectations" since your long term relationship will most likely end up different than what you expected. Ain't life grand?  

In the interest of full disclosure, I've been married 7 years, most of them very good. I also unconsciously drool every time Heidi Klum appears on Project Runway. The fact that that Project Runway is one of my favorite TV shows oughta tell you something, too.

Cheers!

Tom