Out of Control Hockey
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Resident Matriarch ![]() | ![]() what a crazy weekend! My son's hockey team was involved in a State level tournament this weekend and we had a game friday afternoon, and 2 games yesterday. Now, while we have one of the biggest hockey programs in the state, we aren't even a little fish in a big pond when you're talking about the state level. Other areas eat, sleep, and breathe this stuff, while we tend to mix it in with other things, such as soccor or football. Because of football last fall and that some of the kids are freshman this year and now on the high school hockey team, the team that actually qualified for this tournament is not the same team that has been playing for the last 3 months. So we quickly reassembled these kids, had 1 whole practice, and away we went. The first game only 1 ref showed up. It was ugly from the get go. Apparently playing dirty is something they teach these kids at an early age. And there is no way 1 ref is going to see all the sh*t going on out there. Anyhow, it was near the end of the 3rd period when one of their big thugs leveled Michelle with a cheap elbow to her head. Now, Michelle is an awesome hockey player, but she is only 110 pounds soaking wet. (I'm thinking if I was her mother she wouldn't be playing with the boys any more, they are just too big) As she's laying on the ice writhing in pain, first her father runs over to the gate to get on the ice. He has been a coach in the past and is used to being able to assist players. But he's not a coach and he cannot go on the ice. So his college-age son climbs up on the glass and starts yelling at the ref about allowing dirty play. The ref leaves the ice, screaming for someone to call the cops, and Michelle's mother gets her son out of there before the other team's fans are about to stomp on him. It was scary for a minute. Anyhow, Michelle is observed overnight and they decide she does not have a concussion and can play again on Sunday. Oh, we lost 2-1. We arrive at the rink yesterday morning to see the team we had lost to losing 5 - 0. But the team that was winning was our second game of this day and they were even dirtier! And word had gotten out that there are 2 girls on out team and we overheard the boys saying they were going to take them out early in the game. Of course this just sets our boys on edge and the stage is set. Anyhow, the first game is tied as time is winding down, and our coach pulls the goalie to get an extra attacker on the ice. I love when he does this! He gets the team psyched and tells them"we're playing to win, not playing not to lose!" I love that. It ended in a tie anyhow. We have 6 or 7 hours to kill between games but the kids are ready to go again at 5. This team we're playing is incredibly dirty. Cheap punches, lots of hooking, lots of playing the body and not the puck. But there are 2 refs and they are doing their best to keep control of the game. It's just not happening. Halfway thru the 2nd period a little squirmish breaks out in corner, and this team is swinging away taking any punch they can. Now our team is just not taught to play like that, but I have to hand it to them, they do not back down. Our toughest guy Jason, is involved with someone much bigger and my son comes over to get this goon off of him. Jason drops his stick and he and Matt are heading back to the bench when someone jumps my son from behind. At the same time there are about 6 other players still fighting but my son is now under this huge pile of kids! I have to say he held his own, especially considering how he was blindsided. It took the refs a few minutes to figure it all out, and they did a pretty crappy job. Matt was the first one to get tossed, and he was not a happy camper. He had a few choice words for the ref on his way out and I have to admit I was not upset about it. He's the biggest kid out there and rarely uses his body. We're always telling him to use his size to his advantage, but he's just aggressive like that. But he will not back down when sucker punched and I have to admire him for that. Anyhow, 5 kids were tossed, 3 of them ours. So it's rather comical that he was the first one thrown out for fighting. I ran to the locker room, a place I have not set foot in for many years now, and told him how proud I was of him. He handled himself well. He was pretty upset that he was out of the game, and it was only halfway thru. Then one of the tournament officials realized that the locker rooms were right next to each other and sent a few adults to moniter the hallway. Good idea. There has been so much in the news lately about incidents at hockey games and I don't understand what has happened to this game. It used to be a game of skill and finesse and now it is a game of thugs. Pretty sad. I was pretty sure we would not escape the weekend without making the nightly news. Needless to say, we lost the 3rd game and did not advance to today's round. Just as well. Ok, I've rambled on long enough, thanks for reading my journal entry! |
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Expert ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() | ![]() Holy crap, Guess you New England folks do take your hockey seriously. It is a shame that a game has to be decided by ones size and dirty play and not by their skills. I am glad your son was able to hold his own and it sucks that they did not advance. |
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![]() Glad you son was not hurt. I find ice hockey offensive due to all the fighting that seems to actually be expected as well as not monitored well.I know it is a big sport where you are, and nice that your team is not "taught" to fight, but I doubt that will make a difference in the bigger picture. Seems like the Hockey Federation needs to do something. But they never have, so I guess that's just the way it will be. |
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Pro ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() | ![]() I'm hoping that the whole Steve Moore/Todd Bertuzzi thing will make an impact on the way things are done in hockey. Maybe something good will come out of that. And, maybe then it will trickle down to the kids' level. C |
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Member ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() | ![]() I think its a disgrace that kids aretaught how to do the cheap shots and that it isn't refferred properly. I can understand it happening at college level as that the feeder system to the NHL and you really do have to learn how to look after yourself but at any age under that sport should be fun first foremost and only. I'm a soccer coach and I've pulled some of my own players off the field if I felt that were losing it or just focussing on the dirty stuff. totally not acceptable behavior and I wouldn't condone it in any way (even though I was a very dirty player myself!!!) |
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Member![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() | ![]() ive been involved with the game for almost my whole live, started playing when i was 3 and played at the college level for a year when i was forced out by shoulder problems. personally i dont think the game is that bad when it comes to vilence. i think the main problem is the media coverage when it comes to serious situations, im by far not saying what bartuzzi did was right and i think he should be out for as long as moore is out;however, if the NHL would review situations such as moores cheep shot in the game before the bertuzzi punch i personally dont think the punch would have taken place. i also think it is wrong for the police to get involved, do the cops get involved when there is a fight in baseball or football, i dont think so just my 2 cents |
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Extreme Veteran ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() | ![]() I've played, coached and refereed hockey for many years. It's a great game and I can assure you that the kids are taught the meaning of teamwork and fair play. It's to bad that allot of people that have never been involved or possibly never even been to game have so much to say. Hockey is a great game, lets not sensationalize a couple of bad circumstances, and I think we can do that with all sports. Just my 2 cents!! Geoff |
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Master ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() | ![]() To be honest I don't know much about hockey. But since I moved to Colorado Springs I've been to a few Colorado College hockey games and I say it's beautiful when it's played with skills and finesse. But it can be downright ugly when you get into the enforcers, checks, dirty punches and hits. But I don't think that ugly side is relegated to just hockey. I mean look at Warren Sapp and football. The way he leveled that other player two seasons ago, put the guy in the hospital and he didn't even apologize for it. It's a shame that people can't depend on their skill, quickness, etc., to win that they have to depend on brute force or trash talking. I mean a friend of mine told me about being at his son's Pee Wee basketball game and hearing all the trash talking four-year-olds were doing. There was almost a fight - among FOUR-YEAR-OLDS. I mean that's just ridiculous. But when you have crime stories as much apart of sport stories as you do in American sports today (Kobe, Williams, Iverson, that East Coast H.S. football team for hazing) it\'s difficult for younger players to learn what's right and what's not. How can we expect our young ones to know its wrong to take cheap shots or dirty hits when they see it done by their heros on and off the court. Jeez! It's no wonder violence among youth is increasing in some areas. Crazyness! Ovetta. My 2c! |
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Regular![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() | ![]() How can we expect our young ones to know its wrong to take cheap shots or dirty hits when they see it done by their heros on and off the court. It is not up to the "heroes" to raise our young ones, it is up to parents to raise their young ones. Whole society suffers from "it's not my fault" syndrome and concept of individual responsibility is long gone. Kids are taught by their parents that it's ok to fight, cheat and that outcome justifies the means. It's not TV, athletes, movies or video games. It's the parents and only parents. When parents tolerate their kids swearing at the ref, for whatever reason, when they encourage their kids to push other kids around, when refs are afraid of being on the ice it's not some high priced athlete who taught kids that, it's their parents . Long time ago I decided that one day, when (and if) I have kids, they won't be playing team sports. There will be no soccer, no basketball, no football, no hockey. Individual sports will be fine and encouraged, but no team crap. I grew up playing basketball, soccer and handball and I still participate in team sports, but I'll do everything possible to steer my kids towards swimming/running/athletics side of things. Game of soccer with their friends will be fine, but organized soccer? No way in hell. Not because of other kids, or refs or organizing bodies, but because of other parents. Edited by haris 2004-03-15 1:51 PM |
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Elite Veteran ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() | ![]() Well, my young-adult children play hockey -and have since they were about 5. Now they're on a recreational league, but in high school they played much more competetively. And our daughter has pretty much always been the only girl in an allegedly coed league. For a little while, there was a female goalie, but when she got to high school, she dropped out of hockey. At the very youngest ages, there was no checking -period. There wasn't much of anything else, either. You get to the other side of the rink with your stick in your hand, that's a goal ![]() But most of the time, they self-regulate. Tempers occasionally flare. Sometimes there are new people to the league who don't know the local patterns of checking only moderately and play rougher, until they either adjust or move on. And sometimes someone is just having a bad day and is just plain playing dirty. But between team intervention and the refs, that usually gets dealt with pretty effectively. Still and all, though, I think it's our daughter's last season. In high school, she wasn't as strong as a lot of the guys, but she was faster than almost all of them. And a lot more dextrous than most. But now, in the college and adult leagues, the guys have all done their more adult beefing-up thing, and she can't keep up. Their thighs are twice as big as her thighs, and they bring all those muscles into use when they want speed. And it's just not fair, if everyone else can be checked, however moderately, for the guys to pull back when they see it's her. Not that she's asked for that, at all. But these big grown guys know better than to smash a girl up against the (padded) boards, and it throws their game off. It's kind of sad to see the end of the hockey era here at our house -and even sadder to watch her acknowledge that there's something that she can't do, no matter how much she wants to. But WAY better that, than getting injured. WEll, now I'm rambling. I just thought I'd put in my 2 cents, as a parent for whom team sports in general and hockey in particular have overall gone pretty well. And individual sports, which we're also involved in around here, can be JUST as full of well-intentioned but annoying parents. You're not sparing you or your kids THAT unfortunate experience by keeping them in individual sports. I think that's something we have to fix one experience at a time, just be creating a climate where it's absolutely not acceptable. Andrea |
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Master ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() | ![]() Haris,I can tell you don't have kids. Kids are a handful and if you think that their parents are the only ones that influence them to do right or wrong then I'm afraid you're naive. Two parents alone against a 300 trillion advertising industry is quite a battle. Though you are correct most kids say the most influential factor in their lives are their parents but they aren't the ONLY factor. Unless you're going to raise your kids alone on a mountain with wolves as their only companions then they are going to have other influencers than you. It takes good teachers, coaches, ministers, choir directors, neighbors, first employers, and yes "heroes," etc., to reinforce the good foundation that parents give a child. In short it takes more than just two parents. OvettaMy 2cents |
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Regular![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() | ![]() Yeah, I don't have any kids. I know it takes more than just the parents and that there are lots of outside influences. I was a kid once, I played plenty of organized sports. What really disgusted me recently was that I know parents who were justifying Bertuzzi's hit. Here's a pro, obviously doing something that everyone's kids should know is not fair, yet daddy's saying that the other guy deserved it. It's not going to be Bertuzzi's fault when some kid sucker punches another at a hockey game, it's the kid's dad's fault. In the original post we have 1 cheap elbow, college-age kid swearing at a ref, kids sucker punching each other, elbows flying, hooking, fighting, swearing at refs, all kinds of nasty stuff kids did IN FRONT OF THEIR PARENTS. I'm sorry, it is parental responsibility. The way we behave in the society, on the street, around hockey rink, soccer pitch, is the reflection on our upbringing and our parents, plain and simple. When your kids are at their worse behaviour that's when you know how you brought them up. |
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Member ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() | ![]() Haris – if its that simple then why did I notice a change for the better in my kids when I stopped them watching TV during the week? It wasn’t because of what I was doing! As a parent you have a great deal of influence over a kid. However you are not the only influence. My kids are constantly complimented over their behavior. They can also be little brats as well. Kids are kids -they are not computers. You can’t program then to act just the way you want – life just doesn’t let you off that easy. |
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Extreme Veteran![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() | ![]() Well I think a lot has to do with the parents. I once umpired little league baseball games and there was one game I wasn't assigned to do but was asked to umpire behind the plate since the other guy didn't show. This was 8-9 year olds and after the 3rd inning I was taking so much verbal abuse from the parents of one team that I warned them I would make them all leave. The next inning a parent came behind the plate and argued every call I made, no matter what I called. Then a close play at the plate and next thing I know everyone is yelling. Mind you they asked me to fill in for this, I called time told all the parents to leave the bench seats and stay away. I then called both coaches and their teams together and explained that this was supposed to be fun and having parents, siblings and friends yelling that the other team sucks and this kid sucks ect...wasn't going to happen. I had some help getting the parents to leave from the head of the little league who happened to be arriving as the parents were argueing. Eventually play resumed and we played 4 more innings without anyone watching. The game went by without another mishap and both coaches came to me after the game and said they had never seen anything like it but we very impressed with the results. Needless to say my reputation spread as someone not to mess with when I umpired and was actually requested for several games I wasn't scheduled to do. One game I was asked to work the field while my brother was on one of the teams. I got both coaches together before I excepted and told them I would be fair and that one word out of anyone and they could find someone else to finish the game. I wasn't putting up with parents. Yes I am now a parent and we do have a responsibility to teach our kids right from wrong. Yes there are other influences in their lives but it is my responsibility to make sure they are learning the right from wrong in what does influence them. To blame TV, sports 'heroes' or neighbors or anything else is a cop out. Know you childs friends, know what they are watching and talk to them about what is going on. I would never go so far as to say they (my kids) shouldn't or won't play team sports, there are way too many good things that come from team work. Look in the real world, in my job you need partners (internal and external) to be successful. Skills learned from working as a team at a young age are instrumental to growth in everything they will do in life. Communication is key and if you aren't talking to your child about these fights, someone else is. I have kind of rambled here but a few things said got me going. Team sports are good, parents are important and communication is key. |