This was my first OWS and I never thought this would happen-- but I had the OWS freakout. I have swam in lakes, rivers, oceans, ponds my whole life. I have no fears of water. I am a strong swimmer, and can handle this distance no problem.

The "washing machine" was not even that bad; there were not that many guys in the wave, and we were all spread out fairly well.

I don't know what happened. I started out fine-- bilateral breathing, a little bit of bumping and good sighting, but when I rounded the first bouy I just started getting out of breath, and a bit panicky. I did a few strokes of breaststroke and tried freestyle again but I just couldn't swim with my face in the water for more than a couple strokes.

I ended up doing breast for at least the middle third of the swim. Every once in a while I would do a couple strokes of freestyle, but it wasn't happening.

I don't know if it was the murky water, not being able to see, the anxiety of competition, or the bodies all around. I honestly had no anxiety or apprehension about the OWS, but there you have it.

To make matters worse, in my long, long swim, I started filling with self doubt. I have OLY and HIM and even IM dreams, and here I am thinking... I can't even swim 750 meters without freaking out. I shouldn't be here. This isn't the sport for me. I'm wasting my time (to be continued on the bike leg)...

With 24 hours of reflection, I am ready to sign up for my next tri and try again. I know that with some experience I will probably not have the same problem again.

Practice some distances in open water.

I was pissed/exhausted from the swim. I didn't rush. I caught my breath and had some gatorade.

Everything went smoothly.

DFL in my age group.

I kind of hit emotional rock bottom on the bike. I had freaked out on the swim, and I know already that the bike is my weakest link.

My bike is a piece of crap-- I can't blame it all on that factor, but it is a factor.

So, I'm already coming off a poor swim, and once I start riding, every single person in the world starts passing me.

I had a little mental cadence going as I spun: "I suck. I suck. I suck."

Seriously, I felt like an imposter out there on the course. Like I had no business being there. I sucked water and now I was sucking wind. I know that my negative state of mind was draining my energy.

So, I said "f* this" to myself and decided that i was going to make the most of this day and finish this damn race better than I started. I had to remind myself that I have worked pretty damn hard in the last year to reach this point. I had a little Stuart Smally "I'm good enough" conversation with myself, kicked myself in the ass, regrouped and pushed as hard as I could for the last 5 miles or so. I even passed two people near the end.

I really need a better bike. And to ride more.

Glad to be off the bike. At a power gel and had some water.

I never would have called it "strong," but apparently running is my strong area. This time is about a minute slower than my best times for a stand-alone 5K.

I felt much better mentally once I was running. I passed a lot of people... none from my AG, unfortunately, but they were probably all already past the finish line. Only got passed by one person and he was an elite international distance guy.

Saved a little something for the end and finished strong.

I might could run a bit faster.

Had some water and bananas.


My stupid brain. Freaking out on the swim. Negative self-talk. If there's a downside to triathlon, it's that you are alone with your thoughts for a long time.

My bike.


It took a few hours to get in the right frame of mind to evaluate the race. This was only my second tri. My first one left me with a high, and I couldn't wait for the next one. After yesterday's race, though, I was feeling kind of low. I didn't want my family to ask how it was, because I didn't want to tell them, "not that good."

After sleeping on it, though, I feel a lot better. This was only my second race, after all, and I am still learning. I am going to chalk this one up to a sophomore slump and come out swinging for revenge next time out.

I still can't afford a new bike, so I will try to get faster on the one I have.

Definitely a experience for learning and growing.