My boss's opinion of women triathletes (Page 2)
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2004-09-29 10:07 PM in reply to: #67786 |
Extreme Veteran 531 Boston, MA | Subject: RE: My boss's opinion of women triathletes i hope jasmine (and others) dont really have such awful views of men. Being the only male in a college womens studies class i'd like to think i'm more aware than the average male about societal struggles for women, but i am far from alone. I'll give your boss the benefit of the doubt and pretend that he had good intentions with his comment, and hoping that he wasnt assuming that just b'c you were athletic that you were perhaps some butch lesbian, best fit for construction work, flannel shirts, short hair and only dong triathlons when your softball season is over. (none of those are meant to offend anyone and i hope they dont, but just naming some common stereotypes) It seems like your bosses view on women athletes is pretty outdated... hopefully his ideology will die asap and this whole thing can end before it continues on onto future generations... KEEP TRI-ING! and i hope your boss didnt discourage you from continuing as a female athlete |
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2004-09-30 1:13 AM in reply to: #67948 |
Elite 3020 Bay Area, CA | Subject: RE: My boss's opinion of women triathletes Okay, what I don't get about this whole thread - and I'm a girl ok? Is this question: What is so BAD about being compared to a woman construction worker?? I have to admit, out here in CA I've seen some very fit looking, buff, tan, nice hair, etc. women in construction and I'd be happy to be compared to them. In fact, MOST of the people I've seen out doing construction (as in DOING the actual work, not supervising) both men and women, usually look pretty damn good. So, the typical construction worker: is strong, works hard, works long hours, does things most of the population can't/won't do... hmmm... sounding slightly familiar... |
2004-09-30 6:07 AM in reply to: #67786 |
Veteran 209 | Subject: RE: My boss's opinion of women triathletes Actually....when I read the first post I was thinking.....backhoe? I'd LOVE to play around with a backhoe!!!! But then again my Dad is a construction worker and I kinda grew up with that stuff. Keri |
2004-09-30 10:00 AM in reply to: #67786 |
Champion 4902 Ottawa, Ontario | Subject: RE: My boss's opinion of women triathletes Someone mentioned that it all could have been a joke. Well, joke or not, if you took umbrage to it or felt any discomfort over these comments, you have the right to ask this person to cease making such references. And furthermore, if the person in question persists with his/her derogatory comments, you have the right to complain. Hell, I am a male and was rather peeved at my boss for suggesting that I might be "too old" to bother with career advancement. I let him know right then and there that his comment was off the mark and in direct violation to the Charter of Rights (I am Canadian), the Canadian Labour Codes, and the Agency's Zero Tolerance on discrimination. I had no need to tell him twice! |
2004-09-30 10:23 AM in reply to: #67876 |
Extreme Veteran 591 Miami, FL | Subject: RE: My boss's opinion of women triathletes I agree that this boss of yours is completely jealous of your athletic ability and committment - he does think your one "tough chick" and he feels inferior to you. Pretend there's vaseline on your back and let it slide... |
2004-09-30 10:24 AM in reply to: #67962 |
Elite 3972 Reno | Subject: RE: My boss's opinion of women triathletes cadreamer - 2004-09-30 1:13 AM Okay, what I don't get about this whole thread - and I'm a girl ok? Is this question: What is so BAD about being compared to a woman construction worker?? I have to admit, out here in CA I've seen some very fit looking, buff, tan, nice hair, etc. women in construction and I'd be happy to be compared to them. In fact, MOST of the people I've seen out doing construction (as in DOING the actual work, not supervising) both men and women, usually look pretty damn good. So, the typical construction worker: is strong, works hard, works long hours, does things most of the population can't/won't do... hmmm... sounding slightly familiar... I agree - we should be careful of our own stereotypes before we get out panties in a bunch about someone's views of us. |
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2004-09-30 10:57 AM in reply to: #67889 |
Pro 5153 Helena, MT | Subject: RE: My boss's opinion of women triathletes I have to agree with L2T, cadreamer and bootygirl and I wouldn't hesitate to define myself as a feminist (and I have to say that bockhoe operator is on my list of dream professions!). I just think this was his bumbling attempt at a joke. That said, Machiavelo is totally right that if you're offended by the comment you have every right to tell him it was offensive and to not continue with such comments. |
2004-09-30 10:59 AM in reply to: #67786 |
Expert 774 England | Subject: RE: My boss's opinion of women triathletes Sorry.....a little late to this thread but feel it is a little close to what I do for a living so wanted to chip in.... I think it would be a good idea to ask some questions and listen for some more information, as you seem to be confused on what was meant by the remark. Maybe it would be helpful to ask something like "....after thinking about your comment from the other day, I was a little confused as to exactly what you meant. Please could you just clarify exactly what you meant...." If you were offended in any way, or his explanation offends you, you may want to give him some appropriately worded feedback (being serious here...), so he is aware of the impact of his remarks and can respond. Whether you take any futher action or not, you will hopefully at least understand the intent behind his comment and he will understand it's impact on you. I believe "seek first to understand........" would apply in this situation. Good luck. |
2004-09-30 11:33 AM in reply to: #67786 |
Expert 1180 Iowa | Subject: RE: My boss's opinion of women triathletes As the TV reporter is fond of saying, "Give me a break!" Is it possible some folks just need to lighten up? We're all human. Not every human being is articulate or enlightened, not even all bosses, not even all employees. I am amused by the number of folks who immediately begin to use words like "sexist," "harassment," "take action against" and write up some kind of "performance counseling." Have we forgotten how to talk to each other? Why not simply ask him to clarify? I heard nothing about the guy being a boor or showing a pattern of sexism or harassment. Maybe it was a fumbled compliment, or maybe it was purposefully derogatory. Either way, inviting him to try a triathlon some time would probably end the conversation, or maybe even inspire him to improve his life and start training for one. Now that would be worth far more than a high-handed complaint that turns a small incident into the office brouhaha. |
2004-09-30 11:43 AM in reply to: #67786 |
Elite 3972 Reno | Subject: RE: My boss's opinion of women triathletes Just to re-focus on the original intent of this thread was that Browe79 was just sharing an odd comment from the boss..... and it was odd. |
2004-09-30 12:39 PM in reply to: #67786 |
Master 2233 Mechanicsburg, PA | Subject: RE: My boss's opinion of women triathletes My take... Find the aforementioned construction site. Ask backhoe operator to run you through the "basics." Drive said backhoe in through your boss' office and coyly ask "Was it a backhoe like this? I just wanted to make sure..." -Frank |
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2004-09-30 1:05 PM in reply to: #67786 |
Elite 3972 Reno | Subject: RE: My boss's opinion of women triathletes Leave it to Frank to give such practical advice! |
2004-09-30 2:38 PM in reply to: #68102 |
Subject: ... This user's post has been ignored. |
2004-09-30 3:08 PM in reply to: #67786 |
Master 2233 Mechanicsburg, PA | Subject: RE: My boss's opinion of women triathletes |
2004-09-30 3:38 PM in reply to: #67786 |
Elite Veteran 628 Atlanta, GA | Subject: RE: My boss's opinion of women triathletes A couple of you have some good ideas if I wanted to get fired. But... Just for the record: My boss is a very nice man. Even though I didn't see much of a correlation, I took what he said as a compliment. |
2004-09-30 3:48 PM in reply to: #68075 |
Master 1275 Sonoma County, CA | Subject: RE: My boss's opinion of women triathletes triman50 - 2004-09-30 8:33 AM As the TV reporter is fond of saying, "Give me a break!" Is it possible some folks just need to lighten up? We're all human. Not every human being is articulate or enlightened, not even all bosses, not even all employees. I am amused by the number of folks who immediately begin to use words like "sexist," "harassment," "take action against" and write up some kind of "performance counseling." Triman...Amen....I couldn't agree more. But alas, I am not amused by the number of folks who jumped to the conclusions I'm actually saddened.....It's an evolutionary process, folks and rather than beat people over the head with it, focus on educating others about the similarities (brain wise) and differences (physical wise) between the sexes.... |
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2004-09-30 4:09 PM in reply to: #68187 |
Resident Curmudgeon 25290 The Road Back | Subject: RE: My boss's opinion of women triathletes Like a few others here I am amazed that so many BTers took an off-hand comment and interpreted it as a basis for a sexual harrassment action. Especially since they had only an inkling of the context. Bethany has verified how off-base y'all are. Just shows how litigious and how overly sensitive our society has become. Lighten up people! |
2004-09-30 6:21 PM in reply to: #67842 |
Expert 1065 Montreal | Subject: RE: My boss's opinion of women triathletes Curious how sexist stereotyping is always considered valid when made by a woman but grounds for legal action when made by a man. |
2004-09-30 7:52 PM in reply to: #67786 |
Veteran 275 San Diego, CA | Subject: RE: My boss's opinion of women triathletes O.K. I guess that I for one took this whole thing out of context, and I am guilty of assuming the boss is a sexist (I thinkI used idiot & jackass in the orig post), but in the job I have, it is best assume the worst and then prove inocence from there, because sure 'nuff, that one you blow off or poo poo away is the one that lands a lawsuit. This does go BOTH ways though. Please apologize to your boss for me, and don't head this way with your back hoe! John :-( |
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