Triathlon Dating Thread Ver 3.0 (Page 4)

First trip together with Girlfriend this weekend.  Both of our schedules have been horrid over the past weeks, though we've done our best to spend some time together...it's been minimal.  On the plus, our sucky times happen at the same time..  But they're still sucky...

This weekend we're going to hike around Joshua Tree, a park we've both wanted to visit for a long time.  Short trip (Friday evening - Sunday morning)...I'm a little nervous since we've never traveled anywhere together before, but I'm really looking forward to the time and adventure.  

Good luck, dude!

Had my first match.com date last night.  Went very well. Loads in common, similar values, and chemistry.  He's also in the national guard and I do love me a man in uniform.  Looking forward to date number two.

Question about texting... I've never, ever been a texter but it seems to be the preferred method of communication on the dating scene.  Any rules of thumb here?  Seems like a slippery slope to me of being too available.

Rule #1  Trust fate when texting.  Let autocorrect do it's thing and don't proof read.

Lol...his loss.  It does sound like you two had communication problems, though.  Maybe not that either of you were wrong, just using different dialects.

Indeed, good luck! Don't forget to relax and enjoy.

This. (Not!) 

So don't be too available.  You don't have to drop everything to respond right away...that's the beauty of texting.   It's there for when you have the time to get back to it.  Finish what you're doing, then text back.  And don't freak out if he usually texts back right away but sometimes takes forever.  It happens for legit reasons.

And give the benefit of the doubt when reading texts because you can't convey emotion very well without voice inflection or facial expression - my last girlfriend invariably read every text (not just from me, from everyone) with a snotty tone and wondered why everyone was being a beeotch for no reason.  I would read the same text to her with a different tone and wondered where she picked up negative energy (Answer:  It was her own negative energy).

Lastly: Double-check the recipient!  (I've dated and am friends with a ridiculous number of "Jens."  Awfully embarrassing to text my ex wife (also a Jen) about what a great romp we just had...

I was talking to two Amy's once and lost one after getting one confused with the other.  Now I make sure I add pictures to my contacts.

So many responses.

So true!  It seems like 90% of the guys I've been on dates with have the same 5 names.  I now add their screen names to my contact info.

I'll chime in about texting.  I can see why people go to that.  For most people, it's hard to talk to someone in an uncomfortable or nervous situation.  Some, like me, just don't like talking on the phone in general.  SO, I can see why texting is the easy way to avoid talking.

However, if I was dating, I think that's a bit impersonal (I guess I'm old school) and would call for most things unless it's just to send a quick status update (running 10 min late or something).

I'm probably more responsive with texts than calls.  I respond almost the instant I see it - even if it's just one word but I NEVER answer a call unless I know who it is.  To me, I don't understand how it takes so long for someone to respond to a text (unless they are at meetings or sleeping or left their phone somewhere).

I'll respond just to say "talk later" to not leave someone hanging/waiting for a response.

Miss Manners needs to write a texting/smartphone etiquette book, IMO.

I thought girls didn't like that.

I was just thinking general dos/don'ts.  So far my experiences has been all over the place. For example, one guy would text essays, another would send short ambiguous messages with no response, and another flirted with me via text all day long.  

I'm ok following the guys lead but I also don't want to appear unconfident.  Definitely prefer the short and to put a smile on my face approach with phone calls for actual conversation.

You are right everyone is all over the place, and I find sticking to my do's/don't is critical for my success.  Not that my list is elaborate but I have a few that keep me in check and true to being me and getting me the right person.

Maybe this is more specific to my age group, but I've found that texting and communicating in general should be kept to a minimum after you've set up a first date.  I've had a few potential first dates flake after losing interest from texting too much before a date.  It's a weird balance, and I've decided that less is more in this case. 

After the first date, it really depends on the person.  

Phone calls are a thing of the past, from what I've seen.  Girls are too ADD to talk on the phone anymore.