Dream Chaser's 'Set a Goal and Capture it!' Mentor Group - CLOSED (Page 54)

Congratulations Marcia, well deserved!!

And congrats to everyone else in the group on an incredible year. I really enjoyed following everybody as they worked toward their goals this season. Lots of inspiring stuff from a really great group of people. I look forward to following everyone again next year.

X a bunch on this^^^^^^^^ Stated perfectly!!

And thanks for taking the time to give me a ton of great insight and advice to get me through some of the local races w/out making a complete fool of myself(Mighty Hamptons transitions not withstanding, I take full responsibility for that )

That's the 5 meter tall Telstra Premiership replica Trophy.  It was taken out on Sydney Harbour past iconic ports and scenes including the ANZAC Bridge, the Sydney Opera House and the famous Luna Park face.  That's what the web page says

It pains me to see you even call 'that' transitioning!!!   It's more like "standing around for five minutes and bs'ing with another guy commenting on how he too sucks at transition!!!!"    I've driven to Starbucks, ordered a venti caramel machiatto, sipped the foam slowly, gotten home and finished drinking it before you were out of transition!! 

Too funny!!!

Hey Man!!! That would hurt if it wasn't totally and completely true...Except for the venti caramel machiatto thing, I don't kow what the hell that is!!

Figures Bobby would be ordering that foo foo crap. 

Back to lurking...

Congratulations Marcia and Renee!!!

Your journeys have been inspirational, and it's been a pleasure to train and race vicariously through you. 

X like a million...and Bobby you are NOT getting me with any stupid April Fool's joke next year!!

Don't worry about not know Ted, I have a coworker who told me that's just how people from some parts of Long Island order their coffee.  

HUGE congrats to Marcia and just-slightly-not-quite-as-big congrats to Rene on their awards and successes throughout the year!!!

As I flitted in and out of participating with the group for a variety of reasons, I don't know if I ever truly thanked everyone for the wonderful group.  From Bobby on down the line, I learned a great deal about the time and dedication needed to succeed, how to set goals and achieve them as well as how to enjoy the journey and do it all with humor.

Even though I have a baby coming in January, I think I have finally gotten the (relatively) new job situation under control and look forward to finally putting what I have learned into practice and joining you all achieving great things in Honey Badger and Dream Chaser's Set a Goal, Capture It & Kill That S#!T Mentor Group (or something like that) in 2012!  

This is not Triathlon related....off topic...but worth sharing. 

Top Five Regrets of The Dying

By Bonnie Ware

For many years I worked in palliative care.

My patients were those who had gone home to die. Some incredibly special times were shared.

I was with them for the last three to twelve weeks of their lives.

People grow a lot when they are faced with their own mortality. I learnt never to underestimate someone’s capacity for growth. Some changes were phenomenal. Each experienced a variety of emotions, as expected, denial, fear, anger, remorse, more denial and eventually acceptance. Every single patient found their peace before they departed though, every one of them.

When questioned about any regrets they had or anything they would do differently, common themes surfaced again and again. Here are the most common five:

1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.

This was the most common regret of all. When people realise that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people had not honoured even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made.

It is very important to try and honour at least some of your dreams along the way. From the moment that you lose your health, it is too late.

Health brings a freedom very few realise, until they no longer have it.

2. I wish I didn’t work so hard.

This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children’s youth and their partner’s companionship. Women also spoke of this regret. But as most were from an older generation, many of the female patients had not been breadwinners. All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence.

By simplifying your lifestyle and making conscious choices along the way, it is possible to not need the income that you think you do. And by creating more space in your life, you become happier and more open to new opportunities, ones more suited to your new lifestyle.

3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.

Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming. Many developed illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried as a result.

We cannot control the reactions of others. However, although people may initially react when you change the way you are by speaking honestly, in the end it raises the relationship to a whole new and healthier level. Either that or it releases the unhealthy relationship from your life. Either way, you win.

4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.

Often they would not truly realise the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved. Everyone misses their friends when they are dying.

It is common for anyone in a busy lifestyle to let friendships slip. But when you are faced with your approaching death, the physical details of life fall away. People do want to get their financial affairs in order if possible. But it is not money or status that holds the true importance for them. They want to get things in order more for the benefit of those they love. Usually though, they are too ill and weary to ever manage this task. It is all comes down to love and relationships in the end. That is all that remains in the final weeks, love and relationships.

5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.

This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not realise until the end that happiness is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The so-called ‘comfort’ of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content. When deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have silliness in their life again.

When you are on your deathbed, what others think of you is a long way from your mind. How wonderful to be able to let go and smile again, long before you are dying.

Life is a choice. It is YOUR life. Choose consciously, choose wisely, choose honestly. Choose happiness.

------------------------------------------

 Unrelated to the text above a friend forwarded this video to me, it is worth a watch...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0dgadTcVu60&sns=fb

 ....and here is something funny

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CYbVpAwGGGs

Have a GREAT day!

Great Post, Rene.  Thanks!  I think many of us on this site can relate to these lessons, and this is why we do triathlon - to live life to the fullest!! 

Over the years, I've listened to quite a few men express their greatest regret was not spending enough time with their children during the early years.  This was my sole reason for not accepting a management position in my current company three years ago.  It was career-suicide turning down a promotion, but it allows me to work from home and put my children on and off the bus every day, attend all of their school functions, and spend lots of time with them.  It also allows me to train triathlon while they are at school!!  Otherwise, if I had accepted that position, I would be gone from 7AM in the morning till 8PM everynight.  I make a lot less money, and my kids do drive me crazzzzy; but when I am old and grey, the money won't matter and I'll have many treasured memories that are priceless.  

Totally agree with all of the post.  Funny because I made different choices than Bobby but for the same reason.  I used to be self employed which meant a lot of evening and weekend work (no I wasn't a hooker!) which was fine when my daughter was little - I could just keep her home if I needed a Mommy&Miya day but as she got older she started complaining that I was never around and I couldn't keep her home as much so... I got a full time 8-5 job with benefits so that I wouldn't have to work evening and weekends.  I feel as though I work way more hours for less pay but the quality time we have with one another is fantastic so no regrets.  One day she won't need me as much and I can do whatever I want but I'm happy that day isn't for a while to come. 

It's a balance - there were times when I resented the triathlon training because while I loved it - I felt guilty when away from the family.  I think it's about letting the little things go so you can enjoy the other.  So ya - that load of laundry can wait to be folded another 1/2 hour so I can read with her or play a game.

Life is short people!!!  Gotta make it count!

Funny, seems we're all of like mind. As a result of 9/11 my wife lost her job as a Marketing Director. My girls were just babies so we made the decision that we would take the significant financial hit and she would stay home with them. Best decision we ever made. I have alot of responsibility and pressure in my job but I also get a buttload of time off that allows me to be at all my kids things. I don't believe I've missed even one event they've had in soccer/basketball/swimming. We're VERY fortunate.

I've been converting all my miniDV tapes to AVI's the last coupla weeks and in watching them I realized how much we did with them which really makes me feel good. Whenever they ask me to do something with them at a time that's inconvenient I tell myself this: A day will come when they will no longer ask me to do these things and I will wish they still did. Then I happily spend as much time as I can with them.

No second chances.

Here's an idea for next year:  instead of Occupy Wall Street; how about:  Occupy Mentor Program Archives.  Let me elaborate...

In 2012 I want to take my training up a notch and I'm going to be focusing on an entrepeneurial work venture, so my time is going to be limited and my fatigue will be high.  In short, I won't have the time, patience, or desire to run another Mentor Group including new members.  But I love this group.  We all know each other.  So why don't we simply stay where we (occupy the archives) and in January state our 2012 goals and do this again? 

For those who want to opt out, please don't feel guilty.  If you want something new and exciting.  I totally understand.  Or, for those who want to take a year off or just don't want to participate, that's cool too.

But everyone, please let me know your thoughts so it will be clear if we will either disband, or stay together for another year.  Good idea, or lame idea.  Let me know your thoughts!!  

Count me in - you guys would all be a great group to chat with as my goals are things all of you have experienced.  Though... I couldn't help but be offended when you said "I won't have the time, patience..."  How trying could it be to mentor me??   Ahem... you don't have to answer that ha ha.   Completely understand and I am IN! 

You ain't gettin' rid of me that easy.  I am fine wherever you want to hold court.  Last night I started putting together some race ideas for next year.  I hope to have a tentative schedule done this week.

I will certainly participate in the conversations here.  I don't have specific goals for next year.  I will be doing a few sprints and half marathons. My wife is doing her first HIM next year and I will probably be watching the girls more.  I may "double dip" into another group also.  I look forward to see what everyone's next challenge is here. 

My only challenge right now is to not gain too much weight over the holidays!!  I am enjoying this time way too much!!  Relaxing, watching TV and eating chocolate mud pie the last couple of days!  Ahhhhh.....the life.