Ginger or Mary-Ann?

max - 2008-03-12 7:02 PM

I gotta go with Ginger and the glam.  Tight dresses, over-the-top hair, big eyelashes, lotsa makeup.  It doesn't get any more trashy than that.  One to go please! 

 

Dancing Fool - 2008-03-13 8:54 AM

I met Maryanne once.

I was working as a bellhop at the Belvue Hotel in Los Angeles in 1969 on Christmas day. A limo stops at the curb and out steps this gorgeous brunette in a halter top, shorts, and tropically tanned legs. I carted her luggage up to room 214 overlooking the pool.

"My, you have such strong shoulders," she said. "Do you mind bringing my bags into the room?" (At the time I was 6'1" and weighed about 130, but what the hell.)

Her nickname for the evening, she told me, would be 'pookie', and I was 'sea turtle'. Yeah, I didn't get it either. Maybe she had some marine fauna fetish after living on that island, I don't know.

Long story short, I walked out of that room eighteen hours later dehydrated and covered in welts. She gave me a five dollar tip, which in 1969 dollars was no bad thing.

Never saw her again after that but I got a Christmas card about ten years ago. "Dear Sea Turtle," it said. "You broke my heart all those years ago. I knew you wanted Ginger and I was just your second choice, but I forgive you and I'll always love you, kisses Pookie."

I wanted to tell her no, I was a Maryanne guy all the way. I wanted to punch the Professor in the nose every time he leered at her with those lecherous beady eyes. As for Ginger, she was nice and all when the two of us met up in Baltimore the previous spring (the bite marks healed in a few weeks), but Maryanne was my girl. I wanted to tell her all that and more, but she left no return address. So Maryanne, if you're reading this, you were first in my book all along.

Please don't make me tell you about the time I met Mrs. Howell in Vegas. I'll just say butterscotch syrup and leave it at that.

1stTimeTri - 2008-03-12 8:47 PM Both.