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Funniest things overheard on a flight
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 2005-10-03 1:40 PM |
Queen BTich  12411    , |  Subject: Funniest things overheard on a flightSo, I did not make it on my return flight last night (long story, stupid airline). Dealt with it, said 'put me on the next flight' thinking a couple hours later. No, 6:30am tomorrow morning (this was today). At the airport at 5:10am, I get on the flight this morning, it wasn't even half full which was nice. The pilot gets on the loudspeaker and says these 2 comments in his normal pre-flight announcement: "Welcome aboard everyone. I know its early, we'll try to have a nice quiet flight and just to let you know, I stayed at a Holiday Inn Express last night!" .....lmao...... "I'd also like to give a shout out to our 3 wonderful attendents this morning (names here), and they're going to take great care of all of you." I was laughing so hard after those two I was waiting for him to finish up with 'word yo' or 'peace out'...
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| 2005-10-03 1:47 PM in reply to: #258413 |
Pro 4481 Reston | Subject: RE: Funniest things overheard on a flight what airline. sounds like independence. |
| 2005-10-03 1:48 PM in reply to: #258413 |
Master 2136 A Prairie Home | Subject: RE: Funniest things overheard on a flight Comet, what airline did you take? I have had similar experience on a Southwest flight one time. The pilot said something like "your choice for today will be peanuts and peanuts." Guess some pilots want to be comedians too.  I remember when I was in Chicago, there was this bus driver who likes to sing the names of each stops. That was pretty funny. |
| 2005-10-03 1:55 PM in reply to: #258413 |
Queen BTich 12411 , | Subject: RE: Funniest things overheard on a flight Air Tran! I had a funny Delta pilot once too, but it was a long time ago so I don't remember what he said. It really did make the flight more enjoyable, I like to think they're trying harder since its so early and everyone is mellow. Still laughing so hard... Edited by TriComet 2005-10-03 1:55 PM |
| 2005-10-03 1:59 PM in reply to: #258418 |
Master 1468 Tampa, Fl | Subject: RE: Funniest things overheard on a flight I was on a flight and I had put a bottle of water in my briefcase as I was going through the jetway. I forgot about it and put my briefcase in the overhead compartment. About a half-hour into the flight the woman two rows behind me starts screaming. When the flight attendent come rushing back and asks her what is wrong she says, "The plane's sprung a leak, there's a hole in the plane." I thought it was pretty funny till I realized that it was the water bottle in my briefcase and it had soaked many documents I needed on the trip and killed my palm pilot. Ironically the Palm pilot had the back-ups to all of the documents I was carrying, in case something happened. |
| 2005-10-03 2:04 PM in reply to: #258428 |
Queen BTich 12411 , | Subject: RE: Funniest things overheard on a flight rbschlesinger - 2005-10-03 2:59 PM I "The plane's sprung a leak, there's a hole in the plane." . Ironically the Palm pilot had the back-ups to all of the documents I was carrying, in case something happened. LOL (what the woman said!) Not funny about the Palm pilot. ouch! |
| 2005-10-03 3:32 PM in reply to: #258413 |
Master 2233 Mechanicsburg, PA | Subject: RE: Funniest things overheard on a flight On a flight to P.R., the flight attendant went through the whole, we're going to fly such and such high for xx many hours, etc. first in English, then in Spanish. When she got to the duration of the flight in her Spanish speech, the whole plane erupted in laughter (well, the Puerto Ricans did). Only later did she find out that she said it was going to be a 30 and a half hour flight, not 3 and a half hour flight -Frank |
| 2005-10-03 7:17 PM in reply to: #258413 |
| Extreme Veteran 389 Central Wisconsin | Subject: RE: Funniest things overheard on a flight I think that pilot use to do commercials for delta. I found an old one of his |
| 2005-10-03 8:46 PM in reply to: #258413 |
COURT JESTER 12230 ROCKFORD, IL | Subject: RE: Funniest things overheard on a flight When I used to fly Southwest from Phoenix to Chicago (with at least two stops in between), during that wonderful safety lecture we were told to follow the DISCO LIGHTS on the floor to the nearest exit. Also, while pulling into a terminal on one stop the flight attendant kept trying to tell us we would get a "fresh flight crew" and kept screwing up and saying a "french fried crew." |
| 2005-10-04 9:17 AM in reply to: #258413 |
Member 24 Muscle Shoals, AL / Navarre Beach, FL | Subject: RE: Funniest things overheard on a flight Well this is not really that funny; once I was flying into Las Vegas from Pheonix on a small commuter jet that was packed, not a single empty seat. I had a window seat when this, lets just say she a DELUXE size, woman sits down next to me. As the attendants were doing their preflight instuctions, this lady ask one of them where the restroom is. Well, if you have ever been on one of these small jets you know the bathroom is verrrrrrrrrrry small; she wouldn't fit inside and still be able to shut the door. She then proceeds to ask for extra barf bags as she has a stomach bug and was sick several times on her last flight. To make a long story short, by the time we got to LV over half the plane was getting sick either from the bug our all of the sounds and aromas assoicated with MEGA WOMAN. Needless to say I spent my first night in LV laying on the COOL bathroom floor praying to the porcelain goodess. |
| 2005-10-04 9:21 AM in reply to: #258914 |
Giver 18427 | Subject: RE: Funniest things overheard on a flight fergie - 2005-10-04 9:17 AM She then proceeds to ask for extra barf bags as she has a stomach bug and was sick several times on her last flight. Ick. I have this amazing track record of having for seat mates the people that ask for the seat belt extensions. I always feel like Elaine on that Seinfeld episode... |
| 2005-10-04 9:30 AM in reply to: #258413 |
Extreme Veteran 511 Minneapolis, MN | Subject: RE: Funniest things overheard on a flight Then there's that old joke: "Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to flight 561. This flight makes use of the latest technology and is completely automated from start to finish. Even thought there is no pilot, this flight is completely safe and I assure you nothing can go wrong.... go wrong... go wrong.... |
| 2005-10-04 12:03 PM in reply to: #258413 |
Expert 1274 Jackson, Mississippi | Subject: RE: Funniest things overheard on a flight Comet, Sounds like JDogg got a new occupation to keep all the kids at the hizzle full of foodizzle my nizzle.. ws |
| 2005-10-04 1:00 PM in reply to: #258413 |
Pro 4189 Pittsburgh, my heart is in Glasgow | Subject: RE: Funniest things overheard on a flight Oh christ, this is exactly what I need to hear as I'm preparing for a 9-12 hr flight to Ireland...thank GOD I got the isle seat. |
| 2005-10-04 2:04 PM in reply to: #258413 |
Elite 2515 Between the Devil and the Deep Blue Sea | Subject: RE: Funniest things overheard on a flight Flight attendant in her perfect announcement voice: "please return your seats to their upright and uncomfortable position." I recently had to endure a relatively graphic conversation between two women regarding their sex lives. They weren't very discreet about it either. I guess they thought I couldn't hear? How can you not listen in when you hear "clitoris" and "sensitive" in the same sentence?!?! |
| 2005-10-12 9:02 PM in reply to: #258413 |
Master 1249 Lexington, Kentucky | Subject: RE: Funniest things overheard on a flight OK, please excuse me for dredging this thread back up from page 3, but I just remembered this the other day: Scene: A late night flight on a regional jet, only 6 passengers, all male, with an all male crew. Flight Attendant: "Ladies and Gentleman, welcome aboard - well, I guess we don't have any ladies tonight. You, sir, in seat 5A, you can be our honorary lady tonight." Passenger in 5A: "Uh uh! No way am I falling for that again!" |
| 2005-10-12 9:02 PM in reply to: #258413 |
Master 1249 Lexington, Kentucky | Subject: RE: Funniest things overheard on a flight |
| 2005-10-12 11:12 PM in reply to: #258413 |
Expert 997 Littleton, CO | Subject: RE: Funniest things overheard on a flight Not at all funny, but memorable. I was flying a flight, don't remember from where, when the pilot came on and asked us all to take a moment of silence. He said, "Flying with us today is a member of the 33rd Airborne. We are sad to say that he is returning to his family via the hold of this plane. Please take a moment to honor the men and women that fight for our country." The entire plane was in tears. |
| 2005-10-12 11:15 PM in reply to: #259176 |
Master 1938 La Crosse | Subject: RE: Funniest things overheard on a flight phoenixazul - 2005-10-04 2:00 PM Oh christ, this is exactly what I need to hear as I'm preparing for a 9-12 hr flight to Ireland...thank GOD I got the isle seat. Emerald, that is. |
| 2005-10-13 3:14 AM in reply to: #259176 |
Regular 102 Dublin | Subject: RE: Funniest things overheard on a flight phoenixazul - 2005-10-04 6:00 PM Oh christ, this is exactly what I need to hear as I'm preparing for a 9-12 hr flight to Ireland...thank GOD I got the isle seat. As someone living & working in Dublin here's a quick few hints: - we love welcoming visitors, but: - don't wear your Nikon around your neck & be surprised when we steal it! - we don't wear Aran Sweaters, caps & green trousers all day, drinking Guinness (honest!) - we have color TV & cars (no pigs in the parlour) - we love American culture - we have Mc D's, Wendys, BKing etc. - we use Euros, we haven't figured them out yet but we use them - the book of Kells is worth a visit (Trinity college tour) - Viking splash tour is also good, open top WWII amphibian craft in & out of river Liffey - the Liffey is not intentionally dyed green, that's pollution! - Grafton Street is expensive, we try not to shop there - we don't speak Gaelic, we use very poor English (we can't pronounce a "TH", we say "DE" instead) Hope you enjoy Ireland, if you want to grab a beer or something send me an email. Failte! Stu Edited by Irish Stu 2005-10-13 3:18 AM |
| 2005-10-13 9:23 AM in reply to: #258413 |
Supersonicus Idioticus 2439 Thunder Bay, ON | Subject: RE: Funniest things overheard on a flight Only in my flights within the USA have I heard such comments scaring the passengers about the security of the flight. In Canada we're a bit more civilized. |
| 2005-10-13 9:26 AM in reply to: #264419 |
Queen BTich 12411 , | Subject: RE: Funniest things overheard on a flight Colomingle - 2005-10-13 12:12 AM Not at all funny, but memorable. I was flying a flight, don't remember from where, when the pilot came on and asked us all to take a moment of silence. He said, "Flying with us today is a member of the 33rd Airborne. We are sad to say that he is returning to his family via the hold of this plane. Please take a moment to honor the men and women that fight for our country." The entire plane was in tears. Wow. So sad. |
 2005-10-13 7:14 PM in reply to: #258413 |
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