Will training logs save my marriage?

Armchair psychologist here, but I suspect your wife wants to spend more time with you, and that includes the 2 hours after the kids are asleep. 

It really shouldn't be an issue as to where you were - when you get home all sweaty and yucky from your workout, or smelling like chlorine, it's pretty clear where you've been for the past 2 hours. If she still has doubts, just get a Garmin and show here the GPS log, but if it comes to that, I'd address issue #1 first. 

Training with wife and kids can be hard, gotta find that delicate balance.

While there is  definately no substitute for trust in a relationship, keeping logs sure is an option and  sutle reassurance sure doesn't hurt either, I train a lot alone, but I do train in a club with lots af other opposite sex members as well, I take my wife out to group training events on occasion to ease her mind and to get to know the people I train with, an example last wednesday's OWS she came out and took Photo's and hung out with the dogs ( substitute kids). and visited with the coaches and other spouses, some other husbands and wives who arn't into triathlon but are supportive of there Sig other's sometimes come out.

When training solo most of the time I train out of the house so bike's and runs start and end at home and if you can't tell I have been training then you have to be a blind person and the garmin will back it up, about the only time I go out away from home is to do the swim at the pool and I am returning with a chlorine soaked body and bathing suit, I train at lunch as well and am bringing home a bag full of stinking workout clothes every night.

I can definately see this as an issue in a newer relationship because even after 38 years it still come up in mine from time to time, maybe some of the younger guys or gals have something to add as to how they deal with it in there relationships.

This comes up occasionally on this forum. Do a search but usually the threads get nasty and are pulled. Balance is tough. Men try to fix problems, women need emotional support. I would consider counseling before it gets out of control. 

To answer the original question: NO

First off, look at the positive - she cares!!

Finding the balance that you ask about can be very difficult.  I was asked how I balance training, work, and family a couple months ago by a young person who really wants to excel in all three.  After sleeping on the question, my response was that it might not be possible.   After all if you want to be at the top, you will have competitors in work, triathlon, and relationships (meaning so and so's husband does.....)  that are willing to give it their all.    That one aspect of their life is their everything.  So once again it comes down to compromises and choices.

When I started the long hours of IM training a few years ago, I would commonly hear people say - you have a very understanding wife.  I would smile and think I sure do.  I finally realized the translation to that was - I feel sorry for your wife.

Open communication and shared goals can go a long way.

Well said.  She may be trying to communicate something else to you.  Try to find out exactly what she is concerned about and go from there.  When I started my wife was concerned that because I was getting into phenomenal shape that I would find her less desirable.  We talked about this and now she is my biggest fan.....and I am hers.  

This kind of sounds like a few things to me.  Trust and perhaps a little jealousy.  When she is asking you who you are training with, etc that sounds like she has some trust issues.  I don't think training logs are going to help this.  Perhaps she could drive the "sag wagon" on one of your longer rides, and see exactly what you are doing and where you are going.  Although, these questions are something that shouldn't be on her mind if she truly trusts in your relationship.  

Second jealousy.  I say this ONLY because I have been there.  When my husband started training for his first HIM, he was always gone, and I felt like I was always home with the kids, and didn't have anything for myself but the title of wife and mom and maid.  It wasn't until I talked to my husband about it, and realized that I had goals and ambitions in my own running which I myself put to the side.  It had nothing to do with him, it was me not taking time for myself.  As soon as I realized that I had the option of working out a schedule with him so that we spend time together and with the kids, it was SO much better.  Communication was the key! 

Now, we both train.  I will run in the earlier evening around 6pm while he bathes the kids.  By the time I get home, I see them off to bed, and we hang out for a couple hours.  Then he goes and runs.  I get up early so I can get my swim training in and he swims on his lunch hour.  We bike together and put the kids in the burly, while my oldest starts working on her triathlon skills.  We spend time as a family doing it together.  

Maybe she feels little like she needs something in her life, whether it is working out, or some sort of hobby that hasn't been communicated.  She might feel that your training is taking up all free time and wants some time for herself too.  It might be coming out in the form of mistrust when all you need to do is communicate a little bit more.  

You might want to consider doing your training in the early morning hours before everyone gets up.  That way you have the evenings to relax and spend time together.  (Keep in mind, you may not be able to stay up too late!)

I've been married 24 years this year.  Striking a balance is hard.  Work it out now so if you want to train for longer distances in the future she'll have your back.

I train in the early mornings, and leave at least one weekend morning for "sleeping in" and having beach time and a nice breakfast.  On Sunday afternoons my husband shoots, so that is a great time block for me to get in a quality workout.  It also helps a bit if both of you have a hobby.

This is me. My kids are getting older now but I have always run early in the morning before anyone gets up. I work lots of hours so this is the only plan that doesn't take away time from the wife and family. You adjust to a little less sleep, 5-6 hour nights with a nap Sunday afternoon ) My wife thinks I'm crazy, I just tell her, like the song says "I'm gonna live while I'm alive, sleep when I'm dead !" 

My husband sometimes doesn't love the amount of time I spend trainng, but he has never questioned where I am, or even once considered that it may NOT be training after all.  He is pretty secure in that regard.  So on the trust issue, can't help you there, sounds like you need to work on bigger issues than that.

I try to train almost exclusively when my kids are asleep, either early morning, or late at night after bed.  They hardly realize other than Saturday mornings when I am on long runs/rides, that I train, because it doesn't occur when they are awake.  My husband and I have talked about this, and he thinks it is more important to be around when they are awake.

My husband isn't into tris, or sports at all (participating anyway), but I am always supportive of his hobbies, I never tell him no on a fishing trip or golfing weekend he wants to take, or if he wants to go watch a game at a friend's house.  I think that we have a good balance of give/take, but it has taken 3 years to hit a good balance.

Good luck.  If you have to show logs to make her feel better about where/what your up to, you have way bigger issues than the training.

I train first thing in the morning 5a-6:30 while the rest of the house (wife and 4 kids) are still asleep. It takes a little getting use to; however, the body will adapt.

Me and a couple of guys have an agreement. If we post a workout and there are girls that say they are joining us, I better get a text if they have to pull a "no show". Not that anything is going to happen. It's just that we respect our wives and we don't want to be put in the situation.

If I were you, I'd switch to morning workouts so you can spend time with the wife when the kids are asleep.

Havent read all the other posts yet, but I'm right with ya....wife thinks I'm a looney and not feeling the IM that I want to do next year

Wife thought the same thing until we volunteered IMFL (finish line). After we were done, she told me I was doing this.  I said, 'Yes ma'am."