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2008-04-16 12:04 PM

Sydney Australia
Subject:


2008-04-16 12:05 PM
in reply to: #1342060

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Pro
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Husker Nation
Subject: RE: Laura needs to Laugh
If Barak Obama wins the presidency then would the US be an Obamanation?
2008-04-16 12:07 PM
in reply to: #1342069

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Champion
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Subject: RE: Laura needs to Laugh

Bripod - 2008-04-16 1:05 PM If Barak Obama wins the presidency then would the US be an Obamanation?

Well aren't you just Hillary-ous. 

2008-04-16 12:10 PM
in reply to: #1342074

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Pro
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Subject: RE: Laura needs to Laugh
CubeFarmGopher - 2008-04-16 12:07 PM

Bripod - 2008-04-16 1:05 PM If Barak Obama wins the presidency then would the US be an Obamanation?

Well aren't you just Hillary-ous.

She said "funny" jokes.
2008-04-16 12:12 PM
in reply to: #1342060

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Sneaky Slow
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Herndon, VA,
Subject: RE: Laura needs to Laugh

Here is a picture of my daughter trying peas for the first time.


2008-04-16 12:15 PM
in reply to: #1342098

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Subject: RE: Laura needs to Laugh
newleaf - 2008-04-16 12:12 PM

Here is a picture of my daughter trying peas for the first time.


Okay if that doesn't make you laugh then you need to check your pulse. Hilarious!


2008-04-16 12:16 PM
in reply to: #1342060

Subject: RE: Laura needs to Laugh
2008-04-16 12:18 PM
in reply to: #1342060

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Pro
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Husker Nation
Subject: RE: Laura needs to Laugh
There was once a young man who, in his youth, professed his desire to become a great writer.

When asked to define "great" he said, "I want to write stuff that the whole world will read, stuff that people will react to on a truly emotional level, stuff that will make them scream, cry, howl in pain and anger!"

He now writes error messages for Microsoft Corporation.
2008-04-16 12:18 PM
in reply to: #1342060

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Champion
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Carlsbad, California
Subject: RE: Laura needs to Laugh

From a Bumper Sticker I saw at Ironman California last month:

"My Girlfriend said if I run one more Ironman, she is going leave me forever.... God I am sure going to miss her"

2008-04-16 12:18 PM
in reply to: #1342060

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Sneaky Slow
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Herndon, VA,
Subject: RE: Laura needs to Laugh
2008-04-16 12:20 PM
in reply to: #1342060

Sydney Australia
Subject:


2008-04-16 12:23 PM
in reply to: #1342060

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Expert
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St. Paul, MN
Subject: RE: Laura needs to Laugh
From a Norwegian exchange student in a class I substitute taught a little while ago...

What do you call a Swede with two brain cells?

Pregnant.
2008-04-16 12:26 PM
in reply to: #1342060

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Giver
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Subject: RE: Laura needs to Laugh

A goup of my TNTers were sitting around eating dinner and talking about triathlon. Someone asked Amy (my wife) what her strongest leg was. Nola (our 7yo daughter) said "her left one."

She clearly has her daddy's sense of humor.

2008-04-16 12:26 PM
in reply to: #1342060

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COURT JESTER
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ROCKFORD, IL
Subject: RE: Laura needs to Laugh

Murphy's Lesser Known Laws*
     
1. Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.


2. Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.


3. Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't.


4. Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool.

 

5. The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong.


6. If you lined up all the cars in the world end to end, someone would be stupid enough to try to pass them, five or six at a time, on a hill, in the fog.


7.The things that come to those who wait will be the scraggly junk left by those who got there first.


8. The shin bone is a device for finding furniture in a dark room.


9. A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.


10. When you go into court, you are putting yourself into the hands of 12 people who weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty.

2008-04-16 12:26 PM
in reply to: #1342060

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COURT JESTER
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ROCKFORD, IL
Subject: RE: Laura needs to Laugh
A man wakes up in the hospital, bandaged from head to foot. The doctor comes in and says, 'Ah, I see you've regained consciousness. Now, you probably won't remember, but you were in a pile-up on the freeway. You're going to be okay, you'll walk again and everything, but..... Something happened. I'm trying to break this gently, but the fact is, your willy was chopped off in the wreck, and we were unable to find it.'


The man groans, but the doctor goes on, 'You've got $9000 in insurance compensation coming to you, and we have the technology now to build you a new willy that will work as well as your old one did - better in fact! But the thing is, it doesn't come cheap. It's $1000 an inch.' The man perks up at this.


'So,' the doctor says, 'it's for you to decide how many inches you want. But it's something you'd better discuss with your wife. I mean, if you had a five inch one before, and you decide to go for a nine incher, she might be a bit put out. But if you had a nine inch one before, and you decide only to invest in a five incher this time, she might be disappointed. So it's important that she plays a role in helping you make the decision.'


The man agrees to talk with his wife. The doctor comes back the next day.


'So,' says the doctor, 'have you spoken with your wife?'


'I have,' says the man.


'And has she helped you in making the decision?'


'She has,' says the man.


'And what is it?' asks the doctor.


'We're getting a new kitchen.
2008-04-16 12:33 PM
in reply to: #1342060

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Master
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Kirkland, WA
Subject: RE: Laura needs to Laugh
i saw this on a bumper sticker:
"Unlike computers, women do not accept a 3.5" floppy"

George bush is a great president! (HAHAHAHAHA!)


2008-04-16 12:36 PM
in reply to: #1342060

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Master
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NJ
Subject: RE: Laura needs to Laugh
a guy walks into a psychiatrists office dressed in nothing but
saran wrap underwear. the psychiatrist takes a quick look at
him and says 'I can clearly see your nuts."
2008-04-16 8:31 PM
in reply to: #1342206

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Master
2115
2000100
Dothan, Al
Subject: RE: Laura needs to Laugh

 A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel attached to his crotch. The bar tender asked him, "Mr. Pirate, sir, do you realize you have a steering wheel attched to your crotch?"

The Priate reply's " ARRRRRRRHHHHHH, Its driving me nuts!"

2008-04-16 8:42 PM
in reply to: #1343500

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Champion
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Subject: RE: Laura needs to Laugh

A guy walks into a bar and notices a jar of $10 bills behind the register. He asks the bartender what's it for. The bartender explains that he has a horse out back that has never laughed. For $10, anyone is welcome to go out back and try to make it laugh. If they succeed, they win the jar of money.

So the guy fishes out a $10, walks out back to the horse, comes back in a minute later and demands the jar. The bartender walks out back to find the horse on its side, hoofs in it's belly laughing hysterically.

A few months later, the same guy walks into the same bar and sees another jar of $10 bills behind the register. He asks what this jar is for and the bartender explains that his horse has never cried.

So the guy fishes out a $10, walks out back to the horse, comes back in a minute later and demands the jar. The bartender walks out back to find the horse with its head hung low and tears streaming from its eyes.

Before handing over the jar, the bartender says to the guy:
"A few months ago, you came in and made my horse laugh. Today you made my horse cry. I have to know. How'd you do it?"

The guy clears his throat, leans into the bartender and says:


"A few months ago, I told the horse I had a bigger penis than him. Today, I SHOWED HIM!"



Edited by CubeFarmGopher 2008-04-16 8:44 PM
2008-04-16 8:42 PM
in reply to: #1342060

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Champion
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Chicago
Subject: RE: Laura needs to Laugh
Cullen walks into a bar. Tony ducks.
2008-04-16 8:44 PM
in reply to: #1342060

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Elite
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20001000
Preferably on my bike somewhere
Subject: RE: Laura needs to Laugh
I saw etched in the dirt on the back window of a dirty SUV


I WISH MY WIFE WAS THIS DIRTY.


2008-04-16 8:45 PM
in reply to: #1342060

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Champion
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Chicago
Subject: RE: Laura needs to Laugh
Horse walks into a bar. Bartender says `Hey horse, why the long face?'
2008-04-16 8:49 PM
in reply to: #1342060

Subject: ...
This user's post has been ignored.
2008-04-16 8:56 PM
in reply to: #1342098

Champion
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Subject: RE: Laura needs to Laugh
newleaf - 2008-04-16 1:12 PM

Here is a picture of my daughter trying peas for the first time.


You need to tell her to give peas a chance.

Or, put them in a strainer and spin them around for a minute.  Perhaps she'll do better if you ask her to visualize whirled peas.

 



Edited by max 2008-04-16 8:58 PM
2008-04-16 9:49 PM
in reply to: #1342060

Elite
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Oliver, BC, "Wine Capital of Canada"
Subject: RE: Laura needs to Laugh
Wow, Laura asks, and Laura gets. 
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