so sick of peer pressure
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2009-09-12 12:15 AM |
Veteran 221 | Subject: so sick of peer pressure Sorry for the rant, but I'm so irritated! I ride with a group every saturday morning even though I work until 3am during the week. I work with people in their early 20s who like to party every Friday. Every Friday when they pressure me to come out and drink, I tell them I don't go out Friday nights. They get all indignant like I'm committing a crime. Over and over and over. Any suggestions for what would keep their mouths shut for once? It's not like I never go out and have a good time with them, I just have this one ride I really enjoy every week. |
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2009-09-12 12:22 AM in reply to: #2401924 |
Extreme Veteran 3177 | Subject: RE: so sick of peer pressure invite them to the ride, tell them after they come on the ride with you maybe they will understand why you dont go out on Friday nights. Other than that ignore them. Peer pressure sucks, but only if you let it bother you. (should I start talking like Jimmeny Cricket...? Let your Conscience be you guide!) |
2009-09-12 12:23 AM in reply to: #2401924 |
Expert 658 | Subject: RE: so sick of peer pressure Ask them to come for a ride/run with you. If they come, sprint off and drop the pricks. If they don't come, give them the same they are giving you. |
2009-09-12 12:31 AM in reply to: #2401932 |
Veteran 221 | Subject: RE: so sick of peer pressure supa-powa - 2009-09-12 12:23 AM Ask them to come for a ride/run with you. If they come, sprint off and drop the pricks. If they don't come, give them the same they are giving you. Good idea! |
2009-09-12 12:40 AM in reply to: #2401924 |
Veteran 294 Boston | Subject: RE: so sick of peer pressure I would just smile and say thanks, but I can't. I have to ride in the morning. Keep saying the exact same thing over and over, but keep it a brief response, and I think soon they will get sick of hearing how dedicated you are and either drop it or maybe ask to come join! |
2009-09-12 7:48 AM in reply to: #2401924 |
Champion 5376 PA | Subject: RE: so sick of peer pressure sarahswhere - 2009-09-12 1:15 AM Sorry for the rant, but I'm so irritated! I ride with a group every saturday morning even though I work until 3am during the week. I work with people in their early 20s who like to party every Friday. Every Friday when they pressure me to come out and drink, I tell them I don't go out Friday nights. They get all indignant like I'm committing a crime. Over and over and over. Any suggestions for what would keep their mouths shut for once? It's not like I never go out and have a good time with them, I just have this one ride I really enjoy every week. Don't let it bother you Sarah. I'm in my late 30's and I don't drink. Imagine going through college AND being in the Navy and making it through both without drinking, getting a tattoo or having never contracted an STD? LOL Be your own strong independent thinker and never be bothered by the weak. You are the one in control of your own life. You set the rules. Don't assume others will ever understand that. There will always be more sheep than sheep dogs. |
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2009-09-12 7:52 AM in reply to: #2401924 |
Veteran 260 Simsbury, CT | Subject: RE: so sick of peer pressure I would have a few colorful words for them if this was an ongoing thing. Like the invitation to ride with you. I have cut way back on drinking and now rarely drink and at first everyone was a little confused but now its fine and everyone understands. May just take time. |
2009-09-12 8:05 AM in reply to: #2401924 |
Elite 2796 Texas | Subject: RE: so sick of peer pressure Hell I work with people who are in their 40's (and 20's, 30's) who still do that... If you can't do the obvious thing (ignore them), just keep telling them no and be done with it. It's their problem not yours. Co-workers who don't "get it" will always be the ones to make comments about how you work out too much, why you don't eat the junk they eat, how you never go out... It simple. F*** 'em if they don't like it. Seriously. It's their problem. |
2009-09-12 8:14 AM in reply to: #2401924 |
Champion 11989 Philly 'burbs | Subject: RE: so sick of peer pressure sarahswhere - 2009-09-12 1:15 AM Any suggestions for what would keep their mouths shut for once? Physical violence? Why worry about people who obviously have no respect for you? |
2009-09-12 8:28 AM in reply to: #2401924 |
Champion 6046 New York, NY | Subject: RE: so sick of peer pressure Just tell them you are in training. Somehow that holds more weight than I have a ride... |
2009-09-12 8:35 AM in reply to: #2401924 |
Master 1702 Southern Ontario | Subject: RE: so sick of peer pressure My friends used to hassle me - but they've come around and they understand that I'm trying to fit them in along with my training - so for example - tonight is movie night which used to be an evening of appetizers, drinks and movies until 1-2am. Tonight we're starting early (because I have 100k in the morning) and they know that I won't be drinking and I'll be home by 10. I also use the term "training". For my HIM they would even fill it in for me ..."Yeah I know - you're training for a half-ironman." *snort* Somewhere on here are the rules for training for an Ironman. They're hysterical and I sent them to all my friends... Found it!http://www.beginnertriathlete.com/discussion/forums/thread-view.asp?tid=142895&start=1 Edited by Silver_wlf 2009-09-12 8:37 AM |
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2009-09-12 8:51 AM in reply to: #2401924 |
Expert 1461 Sarnia, Ontario | Subject: RE: so sick of peer pressure It is kinda sad, that the person who eats well, exercises regularily and spends their non work time in pursuit of a healthy lifestye is looked down on and not understood by their 'peers'. I have sat accross the table from a guy in the lunchroom who is having a sausage, oh henry and a coke for lunch and HE is judging MY grilled chicken and rice. I rarely ever go out for drinks after work any more and people realize that now. They usually only ask out of courtesy anymore. When I actually do go out for a couple it ends up being a lot nicer time that the same old same old. A couple of the overweight people I work with have started to ask me advise about eating and dieting. They realize I have lost over 40 lbs and it appears they have started to see my lifestyle changes in a differnt light. Like some one said there are only so many sheep dogs. Be the dog. Lead by example. |
2009-09-12 11:11 AM in reply to: #2401924 |
Veteran 221 | Subject: RE: so sick of peer pressure I agree with everyone, it's funny how most of them always come to me to ask advice. I've even caught some of them reading the labels on their food, makes me chuckle. It's interesting being in the demographic I work with. I belong to an AF reserve flying unit in Colorado Springs and a good number of them are all about health and fitness. It wouldn't be weird to show up to work on a bicycle to them at all. Most of them are past the college/job training days when drinking consists of 10% of your week. Here though, everyone is about a year out of college and those pastimes are still ingrained. Whatever, not something I need in my life. They'll get over it or they won't. By the way, the ride this AM was amazing! I feel great after 3 hours of pushing myself. |
2009-09-12 11:42 AM in reply to: #2401924 |
Elite 5316 Alturas, California | Subject: RE: so sick of peer pressure Totally agree with the above. I went to a zillion parties throughout high school and college and did not drink any alcohol. A short consistant phrase will work. I don't drink. I am in training for a triathlon. When I drink I tend to become homicidal. I don't drink on Fridays for religious reasons. My wife/girlfriend is waiting for me at home and I am not going to keep here waiting. It does not matter what reason you pick, make it the same reason every time and stick with it. They will become accustomed to it and will even eventually tell newcomers that oh he doesn't drink he is training for a triathlon. Or whatever. The respectable reasons are better than the homicidal ones, as you can gain clout rather than making people scared of you, but that depends on what outcome you want to have. Luck. I have sooo been there. |
2009-09-12 11:50 AM in reply to: #2401924 |
Expert 1690 | Subject: RE: so sick of peer pressure Alcohol doesnt count as carb loading?.... time to reevaluate the nutrition plan. |
2009-09-12 11:51 AM in reply to: #2401924 |
Expert 1186 North Cackalacky | Subject: RE: so sick of peer pressure sarahswhere - 2009-09-11 11:15 PM Sorry for the rant, but I'm so irritated! I ride with a group every saturday morning even though I work until 3am during the week. I work with people in their early 20s who like to party every Friday. Every Friday when they pressure me to come out and drink, I tell them I don't go out Friday nights. They get all indignant like I'm committing a crime. Over and over and over. Any suggestions for what would keep their mouths shut for once? It's not like I never go out and have a good time with them, I just have this one ride I really enjoy every week. Early 20s sounds like either LTs or young enlisted. Either way, tell em to F off, you've got business to take care of early in the morning, and that they won't understand until they grow up. Signed, A crusty young Major *EDIT* Nevermind, you're talking about your day job. Still, the second sentence of my answer remains applicable. Edited by ScudRunner 2009-09-12 11:52 AM |
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2009-09-12 12:00 PM in reply to: #2401924 |
Regular 100 | Subject: RE: so sick of peer pressure I was just having this same frustration! I hate when I get the argument that I'm young and I should be enjoying my 20s and living it up instead of going to bed early on a Friday night. The thing is, I feel like I am enjoying my 20s when I get up early for a long swim or ride and then have the whole rest of the day ahead of me to feel great instead of sleeping until noon and feeling miserable with a hangover. |
2009-09-12 12:12 PM in reply to: #2401924 |
Master 1927 Guilford, CT | Subject: RE: so sick of peer pressure I'm way to self absorbed to care. I'll go out and not go out depending on what I feel like doing. Being pressured will not work on me. But I'll also ride hung over. I sort of like it sometimes in a weird masochistic way.Seriously though, why do you care? Make fun of them and they'll leave you alone. Why do they care so much about whether or not you are going out? Are you that important to their Friday night?I just stopped hanging out with some people over the years (throughout my 20s, I'm 30 right now). You outgrow some people and make new friends who align with your interests. That's life.... |
2009-09-12 12:40 PM in reply to: #2401924 |
Master 1286 Mt Pleasant, SC | Subject: RE: so sick of peer pressure |
2009-09-12 1:38 PM in reply to: #2401924 |
Subject: ... This user's post has been ignored. |
2009-09-12 1:44 PM in reply to: #2401924 |
Extreme Veteran 682 Canton, MI. via Detroit | Subject: RE: so sick of peer pressure I wish people would ask me out for a drink. |
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2009-09-12 2:06 PM in reply to: #2401924 |
Member 190 Panama City Beach | Subject: RE: so sick of peer pressure Let me look at this from the other side. I had my first drink at the age of 35, so I never went out and partied with friends. I don't really like being around large groups of people. My close friends understood this, and was no big deal. Others, however, would see the fact that i didn't drink or go out and party as a judgment on them. It wasn't, I didn't care what they did, they were cool people, but it just wasn't what I enjoyed. I would tell your guys that you can't do both, and you would like to hang out with them, but you really enjoy that Sat. ride. If they don't get that then resort to physical violence. |
2009-09-12 3:08 PM in reply to: #2401924 |
Extreme Veteran 844 | Subject: RE: so sick of peer pressure ask them: if they've ever ridden anything other than a barstool? if they ever run anything other than their mouth? if they ever swm in anything other than their own vomit? |
2009-09-12 3:21 PM in reply to: #2402215 |
Expert 606 Lakeville, MN | Subject: RE: so sick of peer pressure mkarr0110 - 2009-09-12 10:50 AM Alcohol doesnt count as carb loading?.... time to reevaluate the nutrition plan. You and me both. Can't believe I've been living a lie for that long. As for the OP: do want you want. Your friends don't define who you are. Your friends don't define your lifestyle. You do. If you don't like the way it's going, change it. Now go ride. Now where's that Jack Daniels again... |
2009-09-12 3:55 PM in reply to: #2401924 |
Expert 1146 Johns Creek, Georgia | Subject: RE: so sick of peer pressure Gracefully late to the party, early exit. Maximimize the short time you are there with them and you kill 2 birds.... Also, seriously evaluate why they are your frriends, by life or convenience. One is worth keeping, the other is a passage of time and you move on. But always remember, you learn something from each person you meet in life, each person caries something special. |
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