General Discussion Triathlon Talk » Dating a triathlete... Rss Feed  
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2006-10-02 11:20 PM

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Subject: Dating a triathlete...

Thought this was funny.... but true

 Dating a triathlete...

"I am an outdoors type of person." Really means: I train in any type of weather. If it's raining, snowing, 90 degrees w/100 percent humidity, or winds gusting at 30 mph. I don't want to hear any complaints because I will still train in it and you're just a big wuss for complaining about it.

"I enjoy riding my bike." Really means: with or w/o aero bars, alone or in a peleton, I don't care. If you can't do a spur of the moment 30 miler then you're not my type. I will let you draft, but if you can't hang and I drop you - I will see you later. I am a capable mechanic, but don't expect me to change your flats or tune your bike. You need to learn that on your own.

"I enjoy jogging." Really means: Let's run hills until we puke. I have just as many shoes as you only mine are better because they are functional and all look the same.

"I enjoy dining out." Really means: I enjoy eating out, in or anywhere else I can find food. Don't be shy because with the amount of food I eat, you can have that main entree instead of a salad and you will still look as though you eat like a rabbit in comparison. Don't get your limbs too close though as I may take a bite out of you. Most importantly don't expect any taste off my plate unless you can bring omething to the party like more food. Eventually though if your not burning 4,000 calories a day your going to plump up and have a terrible complex due to watching me eat deserts and not gain any weight. Friends and family will eventually decide not to dine with us anymore due to my horrid table manners. Oh, and don't ask me any questions during breakfast, Mid Morning Lunch, Lunch, Afternoon lunch, dinner or Recovery Dinner as it does not lend to efficient food intake.

"I enjoy quiet walks on the beach." Really means: Walks on the beach warming up into an 8 mile run and then plunging myself in the ocean for a 2 miler. If you get in my way you're going to find out what mass start is and let me assure you that you don't want to find out.

"I find fulfillment in charitable work." Really means: If I am not racing, I am volunteering and I expect you to be there along side me as I stand out in 90 degree weather for 8 hours handing out sports drink to cyclists going 20 mph. Just stick the ol' arm out there and hope it doesn't get taken off.

"I enjoy sharing quiet moments together." Really means: It's taper time. Just back off because I am strategizing and in a pissy mood because I am worried about my "A" race and can't workout.

"I am an active person." Really means: Aside from my 40 hour job, and the 8 mandatory hours of sleep a night. 10 hours a week are devoted to me during the off-season and 20 during race season leaving us 4 hours. 2 of which are spent inhaling food and you not talking to me, so let's make the best of the 2 hours we will spend together on average each day. If you are a licensed message therapist or doctor this would make the most optimal use of our time together. Nutritionist is also acceptable, but I probably already know just as much as you.

"I enjoy road trips and leisurely drives." Really means: You have your choice of Wisconsin, Idaho, Florida, California, Arizona, and Canada, but don't expect to do much site seeing. If I get enough support from you we might be able to include Hawaii in there.

"I enjoy site seeing." Really means: Lets grab a mountain bike and get our HR's up to 90%. There's plenty of time to look around on the descent as trees and bushes whiz by you at 40 mph.

"I like stimulating conversation." Really means: while we are running, we can talk about food. Then we can talk about how we decided what to wear on this run based on the temperature at start time versus the temperature at the time we expect to finish, how horribly out of shape we are, how many miles we did last week, and how many we will do this week and next week. Then we can talk about food.

"I enjoy relaxing soaks in the tub." Really Means: I'm going to stop on the way home and buy two bags of ice, throw them in the tub with some water, and sit in this torture chamber for 30 minutes.

"I'm interested in photography" Really Means: My camera is permanently perched a tripod in front of my trainer. I obsess over taking photos of my bike position and analyzing them to get the perfect setup.

"I'm into in technology" Really Means: My HRM and bike computer are my best friends. Until you can give me some hard data that can improve my training, don't bother trying to buddy up to me. You could one day break into the top three if I find you as entertaining on long runs and rides as my mp3 player.

 

 



2006-10-03 7:35 AM
in reply to: #558485

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Expert
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Subject: RE: Dating a triathlete...

This is REALLY good!!

2007-06-28 11:57 PM
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Subject: RE: Dating a triathlete...
2007-06-29 12:05 AM
in reply to: #558485

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Melon Presser
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Subject: RE: Dating a triathlete...

Word!!! I have actually bitten a date's arm ... as he was reaching over me to try to take something off my plate.

Not as funny as your post, but still great:

Why Triathletes Make Bad Dates

2007-06-29 1:13 AM
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Subject: RE: Dating a triathlete...
Excellent, can we meet?

2007-06-29 2:36 AM
in reply to: #558485

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Elite
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Reno
Subject: RE: Dating a triathlete...
sounds like something went wrong on "the bachelor"


2007-06-29 5:45 AM
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Elite
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Spring, TX
Subject: RE: Dating a triathlete...
Oh man, I've been laughing nonstop since reading that. What's scary is that it perfectly describes both my wife and I...
2007-06-29 6:16 AM
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Media, PA
Subject: RE: Dating a triathlete...
I know a few people who could benefit from reading this! Great post.
2007-06-29 7:02 AM
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Expert
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Stafford, Ks
Subject: RE: Dating a triathlete...
Love this post...havent stopped laughing yet. Hopefully she will understand.
2007-06-29 8:41 AM
in reply to: #558485

Subject: RE: Dating a triathlete...
Having dated a triathlete, that's pretty funny! And the odd thing was, he wasn't even competing ata the time, yet still exhibited most of the same characteristics - especially the ones about food. (he was a freak of nature,all muscle with 4% body fat and seriously couldn't gain weight if he tried) It was actually pretty great, because I can eat like a freakin' horse and not get fat, so mealtimes were enjoyable, never felt like I "ate too much for a girl" - plus, he was super healthy (as am I), which made cooking together lots of fun.
2007-06-29 9:10 AM
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Member
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Milwaukee, WI
Subject: RE: Dating a triathlete...
That's funny.

We've already had a few arguments this summer regarding this, and the funny thing is she's the one who turned me on to doing triahlons, I was just a runner.

I'm printing this one!


2007-06-29 9:17 AM
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Morgantown, WV
Subject: RE: Dating a triathlete...

oh man. Perfect.  HILARIOUS.

 I can hear my girlfriend screaming at me now...

 

"YOU SEEEEEEE YOU ARE CRAZZZZZYYYYY!!!  I THOUGHT THIS WAS SUPPPOOOSEEDDD TO BEEEE FUNNNN!!!!"

Definately printing this one....

 

2007-06-29 9:20 AM
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Expert
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Pittsburgh
Subject: RE: Dating a triathlete...

Really good one!

Now to translate this to "Married to a triathlete..." and get my wife to understand!

2007-06-29 9:29 AM
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Subject: RE: Dating a triathlete...

OMG!  This is hilarious!  Being recently divorced and jumping back into the dating scene, I am going through this as we speak...

Me:  I need to get home a little early.

My date:  For what?

Me:  I'm getting up at 7am to run 10 miles.

My date:  For fun?

Me:  Uhhhhh, yeah.  Want to join me?

My date:  No.

Me:  It was nice to meet you.

 

(Ha ha... that didn't really happen, but most of the guys I am dating think I am completely nutso! )

2007-06-29 10:38 AM
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Master
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Subject: RE: Dating a triathlete...
I see no problems.
2007-06-29 10:47 AM
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Subject: RE: Dating a triathlete...
Awesome! I think that'll be handed out in the "pre-date briefing pack" :D lol

@triOK - sounds perfectly reasonable to me. I'll go running with you .... though you might have to drag me round the last few miles for a few goes! lol


2007-06-29 11:34 AM
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Champion
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Dallas, TX
Subject: RE: Dating a triathlete...
Ha! Ha! The food and time thing was really funny.

Oh yea, my boyfriend knows to NOT touch my food. Although he trains too, so he understands.
2007-06-29 12:27 PM
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Torrance CA
Subject: RE: Dating a triathlete...
LOVE IT. I"m putting it in my pre-date info pack for him to read.
2007-06-29 12:50 PM
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Subject: RE: Dating a triathlete...
willie05 - you so have that right!  I was an hour late coming home form the gym two nights ago and my wife's first quation was "Did you squeeze in an open water swim or a bike ride?"  The she pointed out to me how my bike spends my time with me than she does.(it lives in my car when I'm not riding it).  To which I replied - "My bike is willing ot get up at 5 am for me."  I got slugged
2007-06-29 1:09 PM
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Subject: RE: Dating a triathlete...

This is GREAT.  I am also going to provide this to my next date with the next 'mister right'.  Totally funny!! 

2007-06-29 1:21 PM
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Subject: RE: Dating a triathlete...
SO with the great number of single guys posting alone with the number of single girls here ....



naw.......




2007-06-29 1:53 PM
in reply to: #866255

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Somewhere in your dreams
Subject: RE: Dating a triathlete...
That is a funny story but somewhat true! You should see my description on a dating site that I am on...it says something to the effect.....

"Also, a must NEED is someone that is athletic....I am not sure if this is something that is negotiable at this point in my life....I am currently training for a Half Ironman and NEED someone that is supportive of that. But don't worry, you don't have to be a triathlete but you will get bonus points if you know how to swim, bike or run!"

Hmm...I wonder why I have not gotten many responses to my "ad"?!?!?! I really wish I was making that up! But there is no way I could date someone that does not understand. I do know that I have now dramatically cut down the dating pool of candidates....oh well.
Z
2007-06-29 2:10 PM
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Subject: RE: Dating a triathlete...

Just like Gina76 said "somewhat true".

My coach lost his wife, then his finance, and just recently a girlfriend of several years to a triathlon. I admire man's dedication to training (he recently went pro), but he is a replica of a person in the funny article above. he is perfectly happy though. May be he found his "true" love ;-)



Edited by Z 2007-06-29 2:11 PM
2007-06-29 2:16 PM
in reply to: #865790

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Coach
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Subject: RE: Dating a triathlete...
triOK - 2007-06-29 9:29 AM

OMG!  This is hilarious!  Being recently divorced and jumping back into the dating scene, I am going through this as we speak...

Me:  I need to get home a little early.

My date:  For what?

Me:  I'm getting up at 7am to run 10 miles.

My date:  For fun?

Me:  Uhhhhh, yeah.  Want to join me?

My date:  No.

Me:  It was nice to meet you.

 

(Ha ha... that didn't really happen, but most of the guys I am dating think I am completely nutso! )

 how come I don't meet single girls like this up here in Boston??? Maybe I need to move down south!
2007-06-29 2:22 PM
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Champion
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the colony texas
Subject: RE: Dating a triathlete...

I agree with Gina.. while the women I met don't have to be doing tri's. they do need to be athletic since it helps them understand where I'm coming from.   A running partner would be nice though, but my dog would get jealous I guess. 

the hard part is I reserve friday evenings for people I've just meet to chat  over coffee for about an hour or so..something quick and easy..  since I'm up at 4am on sat.  While many single women want that night to be the big date night, and seem shocked when I tell them that it's really just a short coffee date

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