Dating (Page 3)

Stories like these are so awesome - sorry but I LOL'd

I went out with a Pastor a few times (hey I like to keep an open mind) who, when I decided I wasn't interested, proposed that we just do the hibbidy-dibbity and not necessarily be in a relationship. That one seriously threw me for a loop!
 
  

I'm good for one late night a week, I work at 5am so late nights are kept to the weekend. I got called old for wanting to go to bed at 3am.

It's a good story but it messed me up a bit at the time, I had thought we were going to be long-term. Now visualize this: we're at mile 16 and she's screaming her head off at me because I'm speeding up (I wasn't) and as we run past an intersection the cops on the course bust out laughing.

I guess the pastor was trying to be pragmatic. Was he Unitarian?

The BF and I have done a few adventure races together. I always fear something like that will happen...

After you broke up did you speed up and ditch her? That would be a good ending to the story!

While not a break up my ex got REALLY mad at me because I started to kick her butt in chess. We use to play all the time when we first started dating. When I became a stay at home dad I had more time and started to study the game more as a result I started beating her routinely and she go so mad she threw the chess board and said she never would play me again... and she didn't.

Ugh. Too young! +8 or so/- 5 or so years.

For an 80 year old woman, your formula would put a 47 year old man (or woman) in her pool of possibilities.

Rather than the age formula, this might be a better way of knowing how hardy the relationship is.

I've always said I learned A LOT about myself when I did my first 15 mile run. A LOT. I would imagine that that could apply to a relationship, as well. So when you hit the 6 month mark of dating, you grab your running shoes and say "let's go for a long run."

From RatherbeSwimming:

"I heard about it on How I Met Your Mother."

After reading this I checked my FB and didnt realize there where still so many pics with my ex in them, I untagged a few... noticed she had untagged everything... never really thought about this... thanks Lisa.

You realize, of course, that I had to deal with this **** for another 10 miles. I was too stupid to just run away

So you didn't speed up? That makes you are a good man but less of a funny story

is it the race you did in your avatar?  pre breakup? 

I am not liking the idea of dating again, havnt dated in this century, or as an adult really, was with my ex since I was 20.  I really have never been single as an adult, pretty scary really... 

But like Cord said, I get to continue this process of rediscovering myself and growing as a person and discover the type of person I would like to spend my life with.  On one hand its almost exciting to think that there may be someone out there that could be so much better for me than what I have known...  Maybe there is a happiness out there that I have been missing out on all this time?

C'mon man.

Did Renee post that? I tried to find any reference to putting kids first but could not. If she did, I respectfully disagree with her and you .Hear me out;

making children a priority is very important. Kids need their parents to look out for them, provide for them, guide them. But, children grow up. They leave home. They start their own lives. If a parent has no life of their own outside their children and constantly puts their children's needs/wants/wishes ahead of their own, that parent will end up very unhappy. Sacrifices? Sure. Concessions? Sure. Put children first ahead of all else? No. Not healthy for them or the parent.

No, she was sick with GI issues and I wanted to make sure she was OK. And then at mile 26 she took off without warning just so she could finish ahead of me. I *might* be a good man but she turned out to be a loony. As was said to me by someone far wiser, "better to find out after 3 months than after 3 years." She was awfully cute though. Sigh

For the first time ever I will say... I agree with Brad... to a point.

No, that was me BQ'ing at Marine Corps. I'm still faster

OK, so to clarify. When my ex and I were sorting things out, she asked me if we would still want a relationship if the kids were not involved. For both of us the answer was no. It was a very smart question to ask. What I was trying to say is that I feel it's important to be civil to each other and not use the kids as pawns. It can be far more damaging for the kids to see a bad marriage than an amicable divorce. IMO.

You are a good guy, I would have done the same thing. Well I wouldn't have been fast enough to keep up with you guys but in the same situation I would have stayed with her.

There is, just don't expect to stumble across it immediately

Live for you for a while. Let life happen.

Ok, so I'm on board with that. My kids were older when my ex and I split after 20+ years of marriage so we didn't have custody problems or ugly child support issues. Once I was single again I dated some women who had bad marriages but what seemed like even worse divorces. Quite sad. While we aren't friends on FB, my ex and I get along quite well. In fact, she's my Realtor as I am house hunting

Dating after a long marriage and dating in the electronic age are very interesting propositions. Take your time. Get to know yourself again as an independent single man. You could find some stuff you really like or reconnect with parts of yourself you let go of for any number of reasons. Above all else, be clear with yourself about your intentions and be clear with the women in your life. It's better to miss out on a date with that really fun, really pretty lady rather than compromise yourself on some level no matter how seemingly insignificant.

I guess I see any relationship as requiring some compromise. It's more a matter of knowing what the boundaries are. I've been on my own a couple years now and am pretty happy with life. I'm not one of those people who worries about being home on a Saturday night. If I am it's because I choose to - there's certainly no lack of things to do where I live. Really it's more a matter of hoping to find someone who is more than 'fun'. And that takes time.

I should add I deleted whatever pics we had of the two of us. No point in keeping those!