WWCOJD? (Page 4)

No doubt. 

this is not blunt enough.  seriously.  no jokes, no cuteness, just direct "i am happily married and what you are doing/saying/asking is inappropriate.  please leave me alone."

Originally posted by wwlani update - it must be something with fall - this started last October...last Wednesday I was replacing the belt on the mower deck (yes I am a girl and yes I can do that ) however, I just didn't have quite enough UMPH to pull it over the last moving (well not at the moment) part. Neighbor has been very polite and nothing other than neighborly all summer...so I send him a text to ask if he's home (it's about 6 pm and my hubby is still at work - wanted to get this done to surprise him). He is - he comes over and helps - great - THEN while I'm cleaning up the tools from the driveway I comment that I'll have hubby get him some beer - he says "not necessary thank you for letting me come over and help, you know I enjoy spending time with you"...WHOA!!!! STOP THE BUS!!!!!!!!!!!! WHAT????? I say "thank you" and let the dog out of the house and continue to clean up the tools he then says "you know I am very attracted to you" CREEPY AND WEIRD. WTF are you supposed to say to THAT? (well I've come up with a great response but it's 3 days late) Went inside and called hubby - told him what happened (and he knows about the incident last year). Bottom line - I will have NO further contact with said neighbor - if I need help I'll wait for hubby or call someone else....sad...he's a decent guy...

I've read all the posts and it seems obvious to me that you like the attention but know it's a slippery slope so you are clear in your posts you know it's wrong, however the guy who needs to hear it you're being vague at best.

If the guy disgusted you you would have bluntly informed him his advances weren't welcomed.  The fact that you keep going back to him being a great guy, nice neighbors etc., to me means you aren't turned off by the guy.  To have a married man kiss you (not to mention you're married) and you don't set him straight is amazing...Unless of course you liked it..

Lots of mixed messages to him (lunch couldn't happen because of existing plans vs. I'm f'n married, leave me alone)  and to us....

The last straw for me was you actually texting him for help while your husband is gone... This clearly sends a message to the guy that you aren't opposed to his advances... OR it's saying you need a little shove to get off the fence...

This thread could be endless in all the attempts to explain to you how poorly you're handling this.  Honestly in my opinion I think you're leading the guy on AND it will continue....

It's as if you want to keep him in the on-deck circle just in case.... And hey, who doesn't like to be wanted??? The problem is he not only isn't going to back off, he's going to be constantly plotting ways to get you alone... Hopefully when that happens your pretend resolve is high.... Lots of lives to be ruined here...

Nothing wrong about thinking the best of people.  I always give people the benefit of the doubt.  But their IS history here.  You KNOW he's not the best person.  There's thinking the best of people and then there is prudence/caution.  I could think the "best" of a convicted pedophile, but I'm not going to let them babysit my kids.

I don't know triMike personally, but even if his comments were blunt/brash, I think it's a HUGE leap from having the opinion that mistakes were made in this matter and thinking women deserve to be raped.  That's a pretty severe accusation.  I'll think the best of him and claim he doesn't think women deserved to be raped...

Wow, you do make some leaps....

I won't address the absurdity of your analogy, I'll maintain my position that you enjoy this guy's advances as it stimulates something in you that perhaps you aren't getting at home...

You dance around the solution which is bluntly telling the guy to back away IF you really want him to...Let alone texting him to come over and help you...

That was when your credibility vanished....

Keep digging..

Originally posted by wwlani I never said that the did deserve what I said (meant/am saying) is his view that I "deserved" what I got because I obviously wanted the attention (no - I wanted help) is no different than saying a victim "deserved" what they got because of how they were dressed/acted. Tell me where I said they did deserve it NOWHERE - NOONE ever deserves to be raped but if you think that people don't judge a victims actions (which is what TriMike DID do) you are living in a bubble too. And TriMike - there is PLENTY of pizza at home you keep your theory I'll keep mine and we'll leave it at that. And thanks for throwing the stone - never said that I didn't make a mistake - I'm sure you never have made any error in hindsight that you wish you would have handled something differently

I honestly read your first paragraph over and over and still don't know what you intended to say.

As for juding victims, you stopped being a victim after the dude kissed you and you didn't set him straight.  NUMEROUS opportunities to set him straight and didn't...

The true victims are those who keep reading your futile attempts at drawing sympathy (as a pretend victim) when you're cultivating this guy's advances...

Party pooper

Please don't. No one on here knows your heart. People too easily project their own bias and views of the world onto others. 

Hey Jim, my lawn mower's broken.