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Am I being unreasonable? (Page 6)
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 2008-08-06 7:07 AM in reply to: #1583851 |
Champion  6962      Atlanta, Ga |  Subject: RE: Am I being unreasonable?rstocks3 - 2008-08-05 6:53 PM I think I have the greatest wife in the world. She has actually unloaded 3 full loads of hay before I got home from work so I won't hurt my back again before my IM. How cool is that!! Wow...your wife rocks!! Rolling Thunder: To all: |
| 2008-08-06 7:42 AM in reply to: #1583947 |
Champion 4835 Eat Cheese or Die | Subject: RE: Am I being unreasonable? rstocks3 - 2008-08-05 7:01 PM LOL! I've been married for 14 years and have mastered the 2 magic words. YES DEAR! I've been technically married for 4 years, but we were essentially married for a couple years before that. I get in trouble when I answer with "yes dear" because she says it sounds like I am patronizing her. Back to the topic. I'd probably not be ok with it either. If my wife was doing something that took up a ton of the precious free time that we have together, but it made her happy I'd be fine with looking after the baby. If then she was spending some of that free time alone with another dude. I'd probably be jealous. Not because I was affraid she was going to cheat, but I want to be spending that time with her. Group rides/runs/swims are a whole different thing. There's no problem there even if she was the only woman. Right now I am the one taking all the time to ride/run/swim. On the rare occasion that I do something one-on-one with someone it's with a guy. I don't think I'd have a female training partner even if my wife was cool with it. I went to grad school to be a teacher and my classes were dominated by women. I ended up becoming friends with two of them and we would all study together. They also both mountain biked and occasionally we went riding together before/after class. One of them I am still friends with even though My wife and I have moved away. The other I haven't talked to in a couple years. It was the same situation as the ski bunny/buddy. My wife met my friends from school and told me that B had a thing for me and she didn't want me hanging out with her anymore. I said your crazy. A couple months down the road and B started hinting at becoming more then friends. I ended the friendship. It sucked, it hurt, because I really liked having her as a friend. In the end the I should of listened to my wife. Edited by graceful_dave 2008-08-06 7:44 AM |
| 2008-08-06 10:38 AM in reply to: #1582147 |
| New user 7 | Subject: RE: Am I being unreasonable? I can't believe this thread has gone on this long with out anyone quoting the great philosopher Billy Crystal. "Men and women can not be friends." I can't quote his reasons but he slept with his best friend, what better proof do you need? |
| 2008-08-06 11:32 AM in reply to: #1583907 |
Expert 937 Traverse Cityish | Subject: RE: Am I being unreasonable? goalie - 2008-08-05 7:37 PM This thread is pretty much a bunch of us on the net trying to assess a situation with very little information. We don't know if they go out for drinks/food. We don't know if her husband knows the guy. We don't know if there is an infidelity history. We just don't know. In the end, not knowing, we cannot really answer her question, but I would argue that, considering some of the stories in this thread, one CAN argue that her husband is NOT being unreasonable. When I worked as a bouncer, I learned a valuable lesson about not getting into bar-fights: don't be in a bar. Some things can only happen in certain situations...... Bingo! Is the other guy married or single? Is he a 21 year old stud with a perfect body? Does hubby have mostly sedate interests and feels a gap forming in the relationship regardless? Are other parts of the relationship getting weak? There is way, waaaay more to this than has been mentioned. The only people who really know what is truly going on are her and her husband. A long open discussion between the two of them is the only thing that is going to get to the bottom of this. BTW, this is coming from a guy who trains with mostly women once a week and who has a fiance who live 200 miles away and does most of her mountain biking with all guys. Trust and communication are key to keeping us healthy. |
| 2008-08-06 12:14 PM in reply to: #1584494 |
Master 1359 South of SLC | Subject: RE: Am I being unreasonable? Marvarnett - 2008-08-06 5:07 AM Rolling Thunder: If Nan said she didn't want me training with JC (great friend of mine) I would not simply say, "Sure Honey, whatever you want". If she provides me with a sensible reason, then I would 90% say Ok. If she was just overly jealous for no reason (something I would know BEFORE I married her) then it would be a much longer discussion with a 50/50 chance of me saying ok. Just like if I told her I didn't want her doing X because a guy is there does not make me 100% right. although I am batting 93.587% right now QUOTE] Nice Dan. I love the 93.587%. As always, you 'da man. Mike Edited by Rollin' Thunder 2008-08-06 12:15 PM |
| 2008-08-06 12:53 PM in reply to: #1582204 |
| Subject: RE: Am I being unreasonable? |
| 2008-08-06 2:03 PM in reply to: #1582147 |
Extreme Veteran 700 Tucson | Subject: RE: Am I being unreasonable? I'll chime in on the fun, mostly for the increase in post count. I have a personal trainer at the gym I work out at. He is male. I call him Chuck Norris Jr because the dude could kick my @ss w/o trying. Husband doesn't care. Actually he's amused that I pay for someone to make me do squats and jumping jacks. He's ok with this because if I let him be my trainer, I would hate him (my husband). I need the accountability & push to go do strength training to help get back in shape. A trainer does that for me. Unless he is hiding it well, I'm pretty sure my husband doesn't mind that I spend a half hour 2x a week getting sweaty all over this guy (wait...that doesn't sound right
Oh, and I'm sure it has been mentioned prior, but the OP said she was "lost without A training partner." Not that specific person, just someone. |
| 2008-08-06 2:05 PM in reply to: #1582147 |
| 286 | Subject: RE: Am I being unreasonable? I can't believe there are 6 pages of replies to this post... |
| 2008-08-06 2:05 PM in reply to: #1585837 |
Pro 4339 Husker Nation | Subject: RE: Am I being unreasonable? jdevito20 - 2008-08-06 2:05 PM I can't believe there are 6 pages of replies to this post... Is 6 pages unreasonable?  |
| 2008-08-06 2:08 PM in reply to: #1582147 |
Cycling Guru 15134 Fulton, MD | Subject: RE: Am I being unreasonable? You're paying someone to push you. You aren't meeting them once or twice or week on their own accord ....... |
| 2008-08-06 3:27 PM in reply to: #1585851 |
Extreme Veteran 700 Tucson | Subject: RE: Am I being unreasonable? Daremo - 2008-08-06 1:08 PM You're paying someone to push you. You aren't meeting them once or twice or week on their own accord ....... I'll assume this was directed to me, and true valid point. So if you really wanted to go off the wall with this. The OP COULD give her training partner a couple bucks each time they train. Now he's a paid trainer, problem solved. |
| 2008-08-06 3:30 PM in reply to: #1586142 |
Resident Curmudgeon 25290 The Road Back Gold member | Subject: RE: Am I being unreasonable? kmanus - 2008-08-06 3:27 PM Daremo - 2008-08-06 1:08 PM You're paying someone to push you. You aren't meeting them once or twice or week on their own accord ....... I'll assume this was directed to me, and true valid point. So if you really wanted to go off the wall with this. The OP COULD give her training partner a couple bucks each time they train. Now he's a paid trainer, problem solved. I'm sure that would make her husband feel a whole lot better Cue up David Lee Roth: I'm just a gigolo, and everywhere I go... Edited by the bear 2008-08-06 3:31 PM |
| 2008-08-06 3:33 PM in reply to: #1586163 |
Champion 8540 the colony texas | Subject: RE: Am I being unreasonable? wow this is page six and the Lance Armstrong thread is only on #5.. |
| 2008-08-06 3:35 PM in reply to: #1586175 |
Cycling Guru 15134 Fulton, MD | Subject: RE: Am I being unreasonable? Because that topic has been beaten to death for years ....... this one is fresh and exciting! Who doesn't like to see marital strife?! It is all that sells on TV shows, so why not on BT!
(working for page 7). |
| 2008-08-06 3:37 PM in reply to: #1586182 |
Pro 4507 Simpsonville, SC | Subject: RE: Am I being unreasonable? Daremo - 2008-08-06 4:35 PM Because that topic has been beaten to death for years ....... this one is fresh and exciting! Who doesn't like to see marital strife?! It is all that sells on TV shows, so why not on BT!
(working for page 7). And we are all waiting for more skeletons to come out of your closet  ! |
| 2008-08-06 3:46 PM in reply to: #1586182 |
Champion 8540 the colony texas | Subject: RE: Am I being unreasonable? Daremo - 2008-08-06 3:35 PM Because that topic has been beaten to death for years ....... this one is fresh and exciting! Who doesn't like to see marital strife?! It is all that sells on TV shows, so why not on BT!
(working for page 7). very true.. sex sells.. yes I know there was nothing sexually going on here people |
| 2008-08-06 3:51 PM in reply to: #1586182 |
Master 1359 South of SLC | Subject: RE: Am I being unreasonable? Daremo - 2008-08-06 1:35 PM Because that topic has been beaten to death for years ....... this one is fresh and exciting! Who doesn't like to see marital strife?! It is all that sells on TV shows, so why not on BT!
(working for page 7). Come on Rick, the details of your story would increase the page count to at least 10. We are all dying to hear it... Mike |
| 2008-08-06 6:07 PM in reply to: #1582147 |
Cycling Guru 15134 Fulton, MD | Subject: RE: Am I being unreasonable? I never kiss and tell. (And my wife already knows about my salicious past so there isn't much to worry about there). |
| 2008-08-06 6:52 PM in reply to: #1582147 |
Extreme Veteran 644 Anaheim | Subject: RE: Am I being unreasonable? |
| 2008-08-06 7:30 PM in reply to: #1586588 |
Master 1903 Portland, Oregon | Subject: RE: Am I being unreasonable? Broompatrol - 2008-08-06 4:52 PM Marital advice: Keep your husband happy. Triathlon Advice: Marry your partner. Done and Done! |
| 2008-08-06 7:44 PM in reply to: #1582147 |
Master 1920 Ann Arbor, MI | Subject: RE: Am I being unreasonable? You could also work really hard for 2 years to get your SO to become your training partner, then when he does, get mad that he's faster than you Hehe. |
| 2008-08-06 8:22 PM in reply to: #1586649 |
Bob 2194 Binghamton, NY | Subject: RE: Am I being unreasonable? jazz82482 - 2008-08-06 8:44 PM You could also work really hard for 2 years to get your SO to become your training partner, then when he does, get mad that he's faster than you Hehe.A couple twists of the brake cable will solve that Alaina! |
| 2008-08-06 8:31 PM in reply to: #1586698 |
Master 1920 Ann Arbor, MI | Subject: RE: Am I being unreasonable? rstocks3 - 2008-08-06 9:22 PM jazz82482 - 2008-08-06 8:44 PM You could also work really hard for 2 years to get your SO to become your training partner, then when he does, get mad that he's faster than you Hehe.A couple twists of the brake cable will solve that Alaina! I've already loosened his front skewer- don't tell him! Too bad he doesn't carry Hay for me, though, cause that would be suuper cool |
| 2008-08-06 9:03 PM in reply to: #1582147 |
Expert 934 FL | Subject: RE: Am I being unreasonable? Yes, you are. If you care about your marriage, you would not be training with a man in a one on one situation. A group is probably fine.
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| 2008-08-06 9:09 PM in reply to: #1585565 |
Veteran 928 Columbus, Ohio | Subject: RE: Am I being unreasonable? Dream Chaser - 2008-08-06 1:53 PM Scout7 - 2008-08-05 10:28 AM Yes. You're putting your training ahead of your husband. X2 The word that measures how much I disagree with you does not exist. Tell your husband to GROW UP! |
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