Nicknames for regulars?

that's so funny. Here are mine:

J-Lo- Mexican woman who has really bright obnoxious workout outfits but never works anything but her glutes... and it shows... 

EuroFag- creepy guy that looks like the lead singer of A-HA, wears a string instead of a tank top

LazyLady- never racks her weights

Shorty- well, he's short.

BakerMan- way too much time spent in the tanning bed

BD's (there are about 6 of them) baby-dykes 

Big Ears- this former UW football player who thinks he is IT, but one day he took his stocking cap off and his ears popped out like Baby New year's.

Leisure Suit Larry- old guy in old school warm up suit that struts around hitting on everything that moves 

Only a few:

Asscrack Guy - he ALWAYS wears his trunks down around his 62 inch hips, giving ample view of about 14 inches of butt crack as he descends down the ladder into the pool.

Baby Huey Lifeguard - self-explanatory.

Baby Drowning Momma - the well-intentioned but stupid woman who used the "sink or swim" teaching method on her wailing baby.

 Where do you workout?  I'll have to keep my eyes open for them . . .

I have:

At the pool, Splashy.  There are several of them.  They all sprint 25s and make huge waves and splash water everywhere.  Then, they wait 5 minutes before their next 25. 

While running, there is gazelle chick.  She doesn't so much run as take leaps forward while failing her arms around.  I can't really describe it to do it justice.

Bald Power - bald muscular guy who swims all four strokes faster than I freestyle.

Pudgier Guy - Guy who is similar in build to me but huskier and swims faster than me.

Ex swim team chick - any of three women who I see occasionally and who swim faster than me.

Swim fin brother - Black guy who swims with fins, mask and snorkel and is WAY faster than me.  (he's practicing for his vacation).

Car guy - does the 'boot camp' workout in the morning and is always in the locker room talking about his Viper to someone.  He probably swims faster than me too.

Buddies - two guys who are in the same aisle in the locker room every day in the morning with me and Car guy.  They set off my gay-dar but I can't say I'm 100% sure (not that I care, I'm just saying they're not flaming).  They crack me up because they are there at 4:30 am every day but after their workouts they go sit in the hot tub for 20 minutes.  That early wouldn't you trade the hot tub for more sleep?

Big Orange guy - big guy who I talked to once and found out he's in a similar line of work.  Now we say hi every morning.  He always wears big orange shorts.  Really big, and really orange.  Usually a black concert t shirt with them.

Perky - girl with the body of a ten year old boy who goes 1 billion miles an hour on the elliptical machine.  I mean her feet actually blur she's going so fast.  She can't weigh 85 lbs and is a complete stick. 

My friends - anyone who does NOT have a perfect body and drips sweat from working their *** off, like me.

The Flailer - Guy who seems to be able to stroke with each arm in succession and breathe in about 0.2 seconds.  Somehow he makes the second arm come up over his head while he's on his side and actually drift towards the water on the opposite side of where it's gonna go in.  I can't even do it justice.

I Hope You're Rehabbing Your Knee - Very tall guy, about 40ish who takes up a whole lane to aqua-walk/jog.  Doesn't appear to be injured.  Doesn't do it long enough to make it a workout.  Just takes up room when the pool is busy.

Backstroke Lady - She apparently followed us from our gym that was destroyed in the hurricane.  She mostly floats and occasionally strokes.

I've been seeing Dorothy for YEARS!

Oh, and there's also...

Knee Masher Boy - rides an expensive bike and a knee brace and then MASHES his way up the Gandy Bridge hill. Helllooooooo.... try using your smaller gears and maybe you wouldn't need a knee brace!

We have Greta and Gunther Grunta (said with Governator accent) They are a couple who mank the most gutteral noises when lifting.

There's the Dog Paddle lady. She dog paddles for hours.

There's Jimmy four-shoes, a skinny white guy with a blond afro-perm and black eyebrows who brings two pairs of shoes to walk on the indoor track.

THen there's this whacko with shaved legs who leaves huge puddles of sweat under the spin bike....oh wait, that's me

I'm In Training For a Triathlon - who neglects to mention to the girl he's trying to impress that he's never actually come close to entering one.

Expert on Everything Triathlon - who will tell you how knowledgeable he is, even if you don't ask.  Usually a MOPer at best.

Faster than Me.  Uh well, most people...

"Stevie Wonder" - The blind guy that always takes the treadmill next to mine.  How does he know it's me, I must smell or something?

"Cannonball Roots" - This woman who is about 4'10" tall and nearly just as wide, and she has bleach blonde hair with 2" of jet black roots.

"Booby-licious" - Self explanatory, but nevertheless, hot chick at the gym in low cut top who does things like jumping rope in front of anyone who will watch.  I'm about reaching DEFCON-4 on the heart attack meter.

"Treadmill guy" - lost his concentration or something and went flying off the back with the mill cranking along at about 6:00 miles.  Sent my wife into convulsive laughing fit, so bad that she had to go to the locker room.

"Ancient Poser" - guy in 60's who comes in, sits on equipment and looks lecherously at young chicks and does absolutely no exercise. (Ummm, no that ain't me!)

I'm sure there's more, but these come to mind instantly.

The paper guy - the guy who reads the paper while on the stationary bike, doing 30 rmp.  Or Sits on the leg extention machine reading the paper.  And he wears sunglasses in the gym. 

Jesus - the guy who looks like Jesus.  Full head of brown hair and full beard. 

The make-up lady - the woman with a full make up who walks on the dreadmill. 

Just to name a few.  Makes me wonder if I have a nickname from others.