Mad Manatee Mentors 2013: CLOSED (exc/ Pop Tart bribes) (Page 56)

TriAya - 2013-05-16 9:35 AM

Asalzwed - 2013-05-16 9:27 PM

bcraht - 2013-05-15 9:42 PMHow the puddy, Salty?  (Don't nobody get dirty now.)

Easily the best I've had-oh! Rocky! He's doing well! He's home with special food and a bunch of meds. It wasn't a blockage I guess it was a UTI but some crystals were starting to form. I don't know what all that means but the doctor said it was a good thing. Plus he's not squatting every 2 minutes anymore.

I heart you fatpugpuddy.

Are you calling me that or Rocky? Either way, totally true.

Are you having, like, the best birthday ever? 

I couldn't figure out how to get you a book, or a gift card for a book without having to buy a card and have it shipped. I'm getting you that damn book, I just need heeeelp

Manukah honey is one of the things I credit my recovery from multi-drug-resistant typhoid to. Basically, we'd run out of antibiotics to try.

Asalzwed - 2013-05-17 1:17 AM

TriAya - 2013-05-16 9:35 AM

Asalzwed - 2013-05-16 9:27 PM

bcraht - 2013-05-15 9:42 PMHow the puddy, Salty?  (Don't nobody get dirty now.)

Easily the best I've had-oh! Rocky! He's doing well! He's home with special food and a bunch of meds. It wasn't a blockage I guess it was a UTI but some crystals were starting to form. I don't know what all that means but the doctor said it was a good thing. Plus he's not squatting every 2 minutes anymore.

I heart you fatpugpuddy.

Are you calling me that or Rocky? Either way, totally true.

Are you having, like, the best birthday ever? 

 

I couldn't figure out how to get you a book, or a gift card for a book without having to buy a card and have it shipped. I'm getting you that damn book, I just need heeeelp

Salty Amazon do gift cards that you can have emailed to people. I don't know how to do it but I know they do cause I got one last year.

But I think that most of their ebooks are in kindle format, I don't know if that matters because I don't have an ereader. Been toying with the idea, but I just love the smell and feel of books.

bcraht - 2013-05-16 11:40 AM

Asalzwed - 2013-05-16 9:36 AM

bcraht - 2013-05-16 11:34 AM

Asalzwed - 2013-05-16 7:27 AM

bcraht - 2013-05-15 9:42 PMHow the puddy, Salty?  (Don't nobody get dirty now.)

Easily the best I've had-oh! Rocky! He's doing well! He's home with special food and a bunch of meds. It wasn't a blockage I guess it was a UTI but some crystals were starting to form. I don't know what all that means but the doctor said it was a good thing. Plus he's not squatting every 2 minutes anymore.

Does he normally go outside?

No he is an indoor kitty. But he was an outdoor kitty for about 12 years (he's 13)

So recently-ish indoors only?  Didja get the number of litter boxes lecture?  Like litter boxes = n+1 where n is the number of cats you have?  Often we see UTIs develop in kitties what go outside to pee normally but then can't/won't in bad weather, hold it too long, UTI.  But if has been using the LB normally, then maybe just a fluke and hopefully won't happen again.

I actually didn't get that lecture. But then again, J picked him up, I didn't.

But yeah, he is recently indoor.

Oh yeah, sooooo any tips on giving them oral meds? We have two different liquids and one pill. He screamed like a mofo this morning when we tried to put it in his mouth. Like, he literally sounded like a child being murdered. I think someone is going to call CPS ...

StaceyK - 2013-05-16 5:33 PM

Asalzwed - 2013-05-17 1:17 AM

TriAya - 2013-05-16 9:35 AM

Asalzwed - 2013-05-16 9:27 PM

bcraht - 2013-05-15 9:42 PMHow the puddy, Salty?  (Don't nobody get dirty now.)

Easily the best I've had-oh! Rocky! He's doing well! He's home with special food and a bunch of meds. It wasn't a blockage I guess it was a UTI but some crystals were starting to form. I don't know what all that means but the doctor said it was a good thing. Plus he's not squatting every 2 minutes anymore.

I heart you fatpugpuddy.

Are you calling me that or Rocky? Either way, totally true.

Are you having, like, the best birthday ever? 

 

I couldn't figure out how to get you a book, or a gift card for a book without having to buy a card and have it shipped. I'm getting you that damn book, I just need heeeelp

Salty Amazon do gift cards that you can have emailed to people. I don't know how to do it but I know they do cause I got one last year.

But I think that most of their ebooks are in kindle format, I don't know if that matters because I don't have an ereader. Been toying with the idea, but I just love the smell and feel of books.

I don't think her reader supports kindle. But I can ask!

As far s the feel and smell, on one hand I agree, and I have my favorites in hard copy but I LOVE having a kindle. Especially because our library has a robust digital presence so I can always have something (and not have to worry about actually picking up and dropping off books at the library.)

I was supposed to run tonight, buuuuut...

my boy had his Kinder "graduation". Some things take precedence over training

Asalzwed - 2013-05-16 9:49 AM

bcraht - 2013-05-16 11:40 AM

Asalzwed - 2013-05-16 9:36 AM

bcraht - 2013-05-16 11:34 AM

Asalzwed - 2013-05-16 7:27 AM

bcraht - 2013-05-15 9:42 PMHow the puddy, Salty?  (Don't nobody get dirty now.)

Easily the best I've had-oh! Rocky! He's doing well! He's home with special food and a bunch of meds. It wasn't a blockage I guess it was a UTI but some crystals were starting to form. I don't know what all that means but the doctor said it was a good thing. Plus he's not squatting every 2 minutes anymore.

Does he normally go outside?

No he is an indoor kitty. But he was an outdoor kitty for about 12 years (he's 13)

So recently-ish indoors only?  Didja get the number of litter boxes lecture?  Like litter boxes = n+1 where n is the number of cats you have?  Often we see UTIs develop in kitties what go outside to pee normally but then can't/won't in bad weather, hold it too long, UTI.  But if has been using the LB normally, then maybe just a fluke and hopefully won't happen again.

I actually didn't get that lecture. But then again, J picked him up, I didn't.

But yeah, he is recently indoor.

 

Oh yeah, sooooo any tips on giving them oral meds? We have two different liquids and one pill. He screamed like a mofo this morning when we tried to put it in his mouth. Like, he literally sounded like a child being murdered. I think someone is going to call CPS ...

Here you go:

HOW TO GIVE A CAT A PILL
1. Pick cat up and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as if holding a baby. Position right forefinger and thumb on either side of cat's mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right hand. As cat opens mouth, pop pill into mouth. Allow cat to close mouth and swallow.

2. Retrieve pill from floor and cat from behind sofa. Cradle cat in left arm and repeat process.

3. Retrieve cat from bedroom, and throw soggy pill away.

4. Take new pill from foil wrap, cradle cat in left arm holding rear paws tightly with left hand. Force jaws open and push pill to back of mouth with right forefinger. Hold mouth shut for a count of ten.

5. Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of wardrobe. Call spouse from yard.

6. Kneel on floor with cat wedged firmly between knees, hold front and rear paws. Ignore low growls emitted by cat. Get spouse to hold head firmly with one hand while forcing wooden ruler into mouth. Drop pill down ruler and rub cat's throat vigorously.

7. Retrieve cat from curtain rail, get another pill from foil wrap. Make note to buy new ruler and repair curtains. Carefully sweep shattered figurines and vases from hearth and set to one side for gluing later.

8. Wrap cat in large towel and get spouse to lie on cat with head just visible from below armpit. Put pill in end of drinking straw, force mouth open with pencil and blow down drinking straw.

9. Check label to make sure pill not harmful to humans, drink 1 beer to take taste away. Apply Band-Aid to spouse's forearm and remove blood from carpet with cold water and soap.

10. Retrieve cat from neighbor's shed. Get another pill. Open another beer. Place cat in cupboard and close door onto neck to leave head showing. Force mouth open with desert spoon. Flick pill down throat with rubber band.

11. Fetch screwdriver from garage and put cupboard door back on hinges. Drink beer. Fetch bottle of scotch. Pour shot, drink. Apply cold compress to cheek and check records for date of last tetanus shot. Apply whiskey compress to disinfect. Toss back another shot. Throw tee-shirt away and fetch new one from bedroom.

12. Call fire department to retrieve the friggin' cat from tree across the road. Apologize to neighbor who crashed into fence while swerving to avoid cat. Take last pill from foil-wrap.

13. Tie the little bastard's front paws to rear paws with twine and bind tightly to leg of dining room table, find heavy duty pruning gloves from shed. Push pill into mouth followed by large piece of steak. Be rough about it. Hold head vertically and pour 2 pints of water down throat to wash pill down.

14. Consume remainder of Scotch. Get spouse to drive you to emergency room, sit quietly while doctor stitches fingers and forearm and removes pill remnants from right eye. Call furniture shop on way home to order new table.

15. Arrange for Humane Society to collect mutant cat from hell and call local pet shop to see if they have any hamsters.


HOW TO GIVE A DOG A PILL

1. Wrap it in cheese.

Asalzwed - 2013-05-16 9:49 AM

bcraht - 2013-05-16 11:40 AM

Asalzwed - 2013-05-16 9:36 AM

bcraht - 2013-05-16 11:34 AM

Asalzwed - 2013-05-16 7:27 AM

bcraht - 2013-05-15 9:42 PMHow the puddy, Salty?  (Don't nobody get dirty now.)

Easily the best I've had-oh! Rocky! He's doing well! He's home with special food and a bunch of meds. It wasn't a blockage I guess it was a UTI but some crystals were starting to form. I don't know what all that means but the doctor said it was a good thing. Plus he's not squatting every 2 minutes anymore.

Does he normally go outside?

No he is an indoor kitty. But he was an outdoor kitty for about 12 years (he's 13)

So recently-ish indoors only?  Didja get the number of litter boxes lecture?  Like litter boxes = n+1 where n is the number of cats you have?  Often we see UTIs develop in kitties what go outside to pee normally but then can't/won't in bad weather, hold it too long, UTI.  But if has been using the LB normally, then maybe just a fluke and hopefully won't happen again.

I actually didn't get that lecture. But then again, J picked him up, I didn't.

But yeah, he is recently indoor.

 

Oh yeah, sooooo any tips on giving them oral meds? We have two different liquids and one pill. He screamed like a mofo this morning when we tried to put it in his mouth. Like, he literally sounded like a child being murdered. I think someone is going to call CPS ...

Here you go:

HOW TO GIVE A CAT A PILL
1. Pick cat up and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as if holding a baby. Position right forefinger and thumb on either side of cat's mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right hand. As cat opens mouth, pop pill into mouth. Allow cat to close mouth and swallow.

2. Retrieve pill from floor and cat from behind sofa. Cradle cat in left arm and repeat process.

3. Retrieve cat from bedroom, and throw soggy pill away.

4. Take new pill from foil wrap, cradle cat in left arm holding rear paws tightly with left hand. Force jaws open and push pill to back of mouth with right forefinger. Hold mouth shut for a count of ten.

5. Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of wardrobe. Call spouse from yard.

6. Kneel on floor with cat wedged firmly between knees, hold front and rear paws. Ignore low growls emitted by cat. Get spouse to hold head firmly with one hand while forcing wooden ruler into mouth. Drop pill down ruler and rub cat's throat vigorously.

7. Retrieve cat from curtain rail, get another pill from foil wrap. Make note to buy new ruler and repair curtains. Carefully sweep shattered figurines and vases from hearth and set to one side for gluing later.

8. Wrap cat in large towel and get spouse to lie on cat with head just visible from below armpit. Put pill in end of drinking straw, force mouth open with pencil and blow down drinking straw.

9. Check label to make sure pill not harmful to humans, drink 1 beer to take taste away. Apply Band-Aid to spouse's forearm and remove blood from carpet with cold water and soap.

10. Retrieve cat from neighbor's shed. Get another pill. Open another beer. Place cat in cupboard and close door onto neck to leave head showing. Force mouth open with desert spoon. Flick pill down throat with rubber band.

11. Fetch screwdriver from garage and put cupboard door back on hinges. Drink beer. Fetch bottle of scotch. Pour shot, drink. Apply cold compress to cheek and check records for date of last tetanus shot. Apply whiskey compress to disinfect. Toss back another shot. Throw tee-shirt away and fetch new one from bedroom.

12. Call fire department to retrieve the friggin' cat from tree across the road. Apologize to neighbor who crashed into fence while swerving to avoid cat. Take last pill from foil-wrap.

13. Tie the little bastard's front paws to rear paws with twine and bind tightly to leg of dining room table, find heavy duty pruning gloves from shed. Push pill into mouth followed by large piece of steak. Be rough about it. Hold head vertically and pour 2 pints of water down throat to wash pill down.

14. Consume remainder of Scotch. Get spouse to drive you to emergency room, sit quietly while doctor stitches fingers and forearm and removes pill remnants from right eye. Call furniture shop on way home to order new table.

15. Arrange for Humane Society to collect mutant cat from hell and call local pet shop to see if they have any hamsters.


HOW TO GIVE A DOG A PILL

1. Wrap it in cheese.