relationships and Tris

Sounds like you will probably find someone more compatible and understanding of your Training etc.

I am assuming there were other issues as well.  Triathlon just shouldn't take that much time.  90 minutes a day unless you are going for a HIM or IM and in  your big weeks.  You should be able to balance that and a relationship.

wannabefaster - 2012-08-28 11:57 AM I have an almost daily meeting with my wife to ask her if my training is messing up my relationship with her or my kids. If the answer is yes then something gets adjusted. My training is important, but not more important than my family Obviously you are at a different place in your life and in your relationship. If she had been important enough, you would have changed your relationship with your mistress (triathlon). Everyone who wants to train at a high level and still have family and friends has to learn to balance their life. It is not easy.

X2. If you want there to be a balance, there will be. There's not even a comparison as to what's more important between my wife and kids and triathlons, and i'm training for an IM currently.

It's about priorities and also setting expectations. If your SO knows what to expect, its a lot easier to schedule around and deal with (words straight from my wife's mouth).

And have regular conversations to make sure everything is in balance.

Depends on the person as to whether it messes things up.  I do all my training before work or over lunch and my wife still complains once in a while.  then I remind her of when I'm doing it and that I still do everything she asks of me after work (spending family time).  I think some people see the time commitment and assume it is messing up how much you get to see them even when it is not.

^^ This

Yup!

That's a question of perceived value though. The most valuable stuff to me is my training stuff, which she places no value on!

It happens, except I ended it.

My training hours was only 3 hours during that time, and nearly 2 of those hours were during lunch work hours.

But I still got the..."I feel like ....." even though I barely mention this sport and training.

Compatibility probably has something to do with it too.

Happened to me. Girlfriend said I needed to choose her or the bike. So I ditched her and got another bike. Best trade I've made. haha

I'm surprised they never see the answer to this before asking. 

I could never do this sport without the support of my partner.  Fortunately, we both tri, but if there's something we want to accomplish on our own, we discuss it (mostly for scheduling reasons) and go after it.

We were just talking about a friend the other night whose gf is a controlling nightmare.  My fiance asked her bf if he wanted to the Leadville 250 with him in 2014. She said no and he didn't refute her decision. Lame?  Yep, but he's also making the choice to stick with her and compromise his goals. 

You're better off and now just think about all of the hot tri ladies you can meet

A good female friend of mine told me a while ago, "most women want, no, need to capitalize your time.  This is why so many run when they find out how limited your availability (time wise) is..."  I think she is fairly spot on although I would change it to read "...most people..."  

I found a female triathlete and all is awesome.  

I think it would be tough if dating.  Luckily for me my wife and I have a good relationship, no kids at home and she doesn't mind me out training.  Actually enjoys the alone time (most of the time) But, what really works is she is kind of a homebody so she really doesn't want to go out much.  Not sure what I would do if she wanted to go out a few nights a week.  Ugh....

Saturday night is a relaxing at home with a movie.  I mean we go out after my LR but she isn't one to go out Saturday nights, or Friday nights for that matter.

Works for us but we've been married 32 years too.

Duane

My wife has nothing against the sport.  It's me she doesn't like.