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Very negative response
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 2013-05-27 6:57 PM |
 239  |  Subject: Very negative responseHi. I just came from a "family" gathering (not really family, but as close as you can get without being blood). One of the gals was joking about Speedos and I said I bought one the other day. She thought I was kidding but my wife confirmed it with the mention that it was actually more like bike shorts. She (my wife) then said I was planning on doing a couple tris this summer. The reaction was surprisingly, unanimously negative. Not just in a kidding way but basically calling me an idiot--Why would you do that? Why waste your time? What's the point? Have fun wasting all that time while I'm sitting on the couch with a glass of wine? etc. Now let me say this didn't bother me in the least because I dish it out plenty, have very thick skin, and have no need to justify what I'm doing (even though I think I could have pretty easily). I was however very surprised at this negative response and it led me to wonder what the responses are that you all get/got. Sarcasm? Incredulity? Negativity? Admiration? Jealousy? All of the above? Duane Edited by dbrook1 2013-05-27 7:03 PM |
| 2013-05-27 7:04 PM in reply to: dbrook1 |
| Subject: RE: Very negative resonse Never gave a damn about people talking negatively about it. Don't let it get to you and don't let them live in your head. They're not worth it. Find something else to talk about with them. |
| 2013-05-27 7:06 PM in reply to: dbrook1 |
Veteran 2297  Great White North | Subject: RE: Very negative response Originally posted by dbrook1 Hi. I just came from a "family" gathering (not really family, but as close as you can get without being blood). One of the gals was joking about Speedos and I said I bought one the other day. She thought I was kidding but my wife confirmed it with the mention that it was actually more like bike shorts. She (my wife) then said I was planning on doing a couple tris this summer. The reaction was surprisingly, unanimously negative. Not just in a kidding way but basically calling me an idiot--Why would you do that? Why waste your time? What's the point? Have fun wasting all that time while I'm sitting on the couch with a glass of wine? etc. Now let me say this didn't bother me in the least because I dish it out plenty, have very thick skin, and have no need to justify what I'm doing (even though I think I could have pretty easily). I was however very surprised at this negative response and it led me to wonder what the responses are that you all get/got. Sarcasm? Incredulity? Negativity? Admiration? Jealousy? All of the above? Duane Most people who know I'm into this stuff have a good for you attitude, honestly this lady sounds lazy as f#ck so dont sweat it. |
| 2013-05-27 7:08 PM in reply to: simpsonbo |
| 239 | Subject: RE: Very negative response Sorry to imply it was bothering me. It really doesn't, especially since "family" always speak more freely. I was just wondering if anyone had other stories, good or bad. |
| 2013-05-27 7:11 PM in reply to: dbrook1 |
Master 1858  Salt Lake City | Subject: RE: Very negative response Most people tend to think I'm nuts, but respond in a generally positive way. |
| 2013-05-27 7:11 PM in reply to: dbrook1 |
Pro 15655 | Subject: RE: Very negative response I, nor my wife, ever bring it up....I don't figure anyone who doesn't participate gives a rats arse. I don't blame them....I don't care about their hobbies. |
| 2013-05-27 7:12 PM in reply to: dbrook1 |
Master 3888 Overland Park, KS | Subject: RE: Very negative response Next time you're with the same group tell them you've entered a hot dog eating contest and compare reactions. Could be an interesting comparison. |
| 2013-05-27 7:32 PM in reply to: dbrook1 |
Master 8247 Eugene, Oregon Bronze member | Subject: RE: Very negative response Still can't stop laughing about "wasting all that time while I'm sitting on the couch with a glass of wine". Uh, who's wasting time? If we're lucky enough to have surplus time to "waste", how we do it is pretty much a personal choice, possibly with input from the significant other. Can't see how one is less of a time waste than the other; surely tri training has a few more added benefits than sitting on the couch with a vino! Yes, I get this all the time. Once from someone I dated. Needless to say, the relationship didn't last. A few years ago, a couple of "yoga and aerobics" type colleagues (who'd seen me doing a pretty intense spin session at the gym) decided I needed an intervention because of my "exercise addiction". They thought I had an eating disorder and was doing "too much cardio" to lose weight. Uh, no. Have tried all my life to gain weight; actually was training for my first Oly at the time. It can be even harder as a woman, at least in Asia, as people don't "get" why a woman would exercise for reasons other than appearance. I just try not to talk about my training or racing to people who aren't somehow involved in endurance sports., or give pretty general answers if they specifically ask. They don't have to justify their book clubs or scrapbooking or yoga or even (really!) pole-dancing classes; why do I have to justify running and tri? Or you could take up pole-dancing in your Speedo and see what the family says then. |
| 2013-05-27 7:45 PM in reply to: 0 |
Master 2177 | Subject: RE: Very negative response My brother, who runs ultra marathons, asked me why I would want to do an Xterra race. He doesn't find the swimming and mountain biking parts fun. I told him that I couldn't imagine doing even another marathon anytime time soon, much less an ultra because I didn't think it would be fun. Everyone has their own ideas of a good time, and some are more opinionated than others about their ideas, and yours.  Edited by Blanda 2013-05-27 7:49 PM |
| 2013-05-27 7:52 PM in reply to: Left Brain |
| 239 | Subject: RE: Very negative response Originally posted by Left Brain I, nor my wife, ever bring it up....I don't figure anyone who doesn't participate gives a rats arse. I don't blame them....I don't care about their hobbies. Excellent point. Even though I'm a blabber mouth, my wife is the one that brought up the tri. |
| 2013-05-27 7:55 PM in reply to: Hot Runner |
| 239 | Subject: RE: Very negative response Originally posted by Hot Runner Or you could take up pole-dancing in your Speedo and see what the family says then. Absolutely hilarious! I bet they'd be more positive---maybe I could even make a couple bucks at their friends' bday parties! |
| 2013-05-27 7:57 PM in reply to: dbrook1 |
Extreme Veteran 792 | Subject: RE: Very negative response Originally posted by dbrook1 Originally posted by Left Brain I, nor my wife, ever bring it up....I don't figure anyone who doesn't participate gives a rats arse. I don't blame them....I don't care about their hobbies. Excellent point. Even though I'm a blabber mouth, my wife is the one that brought up the tri. Whenever my wife or I mention triathlons in a group setting, I end up spending 10 minutes trying to explain what a triathlon is. Several times, that is followed up with "Have you heard of the modern pentathalon?". There just is no point to bringing it up any more. |
| 2013-05-27 8:01 PM in reply to: dbrook1 |
Extreme Veteran 1190 Silicon Valley | Subject: RE: Very negative response I have been pleasantly surprised that everyone has been very supportive. My brother, who would always rather be on the couch with champagne (his preference over wine), just wanted to know if I was going to build up to an IM. His favorite saying is 'If you are going to go, go big'. When I said yes, he was on board. So I guess I am lucky in this respect. |
| 2013-05-27 8:04 PM in reply to: dbrook1 |
| 76 | Subject: RE: Very negative response I get reactions like this too. I find it from friends who I think really would like to be doing it themselves but are too scared or just too lazy. But about that speedo ....... This thread is useless without pics! ;-) |
| 2013-05-27 8:05 PM in reply to: lifejustice |
| Payson, AZ | Subject: RE: Very negative response Honestly no. I come from an active family, I have active friends. I have always been active. To everyone I know this is normal and they'd be more shocked if I gave it all up |
| 2013-05-27 8:15 PM in reply to: dbrook1 |
Extreme Veteran 682 Mendenhall, MS | Subject: RE: Very negative response I get that sometimes from family and friends, but im the best in shape of my family. so i just bring that up and they usually shut up. but the really dont know what there missing. |
| 2013-05-27 8:16 PM in reply to: CptSnoopy |
| 239 | Subject: RE: Very negative response Originally posted by CptSnoopy I get reactions like this too. I find it from friends who I think really would like to be doing it themselves but are too scared or just too lazy. But about that speedo ....... This thread is useless without pics! ;-) Ok, please remain calm. Here you go...
(Speedo.JPG) Attachments ---------------- Speedo.JPG (14KB - 23 downloads) |
| 2013-05-27 8:16 PM in reply to: dbrook1 |
Expert 2192 Greenville, SC | Subject: RE: Very negative response The only negative responses I get are from people who think it a complete waste of money, not necessarily time. |
| 2013-05-27 8:23 PM in reply to: 0 |
Master 2177 | Subject: RE: Very negative response I have to add that it's only my bro and I talking smack to each other. I actually get a lot of positive responses from friends. I don't go out of my way to tell people about my activities, but my parents do! They're my biggest fans and they tell anybody who'll listen what I'm up to. "You know Blanda's doing a triathlon?! That's 3 different sports in one day!". Edited by Blanda 2013-05-27 8:25 PM |
| 2013-05-27 8:43 PM in reply to: Clempson |
Expert 1130 Fernandina Beach, FL | Subject: RE: Very negative response Originally posted by Clempson The only negative responses I get are from people who think it a complete waste of money, not necessarily time. Same here. I got some sarcastic responses when I first started running and said "I'm going to do a marathon" at 275lbs. Even more sarcasm when I started saying my projected times. All from friends, family knew I was serious. Now everyone who knows me knows I'm going to do what I say. I still have to explain why I would spend $650 to punish myself for 140.6 miles though. Still having a hard time explaining that one |
| 2013-05-27 8:56 PM in reply to: dbrook1 |
| Colorado | Subject: RE: Very negative response A response I sometimes give when someone implies it's a waste of time or asks where I get the time is to say that I much prefer getting out for a run or a ride than watch 4 hours of TV per day, like the average American. Originally posted by dbrook1 Hi. I just came from a "family" gathering (not really family, but as close as you can get without being blood). One of the gals was joking about Speedos and I said I bought one the other day. She thought I was kidding but my wife confirmed it with the mention that it was actually more like bike shorts. She (my wife) then said I was planning on doing a couple tris this summer. The reaction was surprisingly, unanimously negative. Not just in a kidding way but basically calling me an idiot--Why would you do that? Why waste your time? What's the point? Have fun wasting all that time while I'm sitting on the couch with a glass of wine? etc. Now let me say this didn't bother me in the least because I dish it out plenty, have very thick skin, and have no need to justify what I'm doing (even though I think I could have pretty easily). I was however very surprised at this negative response and it led me to wonder what the responses are that you all get/got. Sarcasm? Incredulity? Negativity? Admiration? Jealousy? All of the above? Duane |
| 2013-05-27 9:20 PM in reply to: delosh |
Master 8247 Eugene, Oregon Bronze member | Subject: RE: Very negative response True, when people ask how I can find the time to train, I tell them I don't watch TV. (Actually I used to watch CNN but mainly while riding the trainer. Now that Vietnam has dumped it, I'm thinking of canceling my cable altogether. I literally haven't had the TV on for a few months.) That shocks them a lot more than training 10-12 hours a week. I think most people don't realize just what a time sink it is. Ditto for Facebook, etc. Cut out just one of those, and most people will find at least 1-2 hours a day, enough for sprints and Olys. |
| 2013-05-27 9:25 PM in reply to: Hot Runner |
Pro 15655 | Subject: RE: Very negative response Originally posted by Hot Runner True, when people ask how I can find the time to train, I tell them I don't watch TV. (Actually I used to watch CNN but mainly while riding the trainer. Now that Vietnam has dumped it, I'm thinking of canceling my cable altogether. I literally haven't had the TV on for a few months.) That shocks them a lot more than training 10-12 hours a week. I think most people don't realize just what a time sink it is. Ditto for Facebook, etc. Cut out just one of those, and most people will find at least 1-2 hours a day, enough for sprints and Olys. I agree....TV sucks...so does Facebook. A complete waste of time. I figured I owed you one, Hot Runner, so I just went ahead and said it to take the heat for you. |
| 2013-05-27 9:27 PM in reply to: dbrook1 |
| 65 | Subject: RE: Very negative response I've got mixed response too. But that is Ok. They don't have to understand my hobby, just like I probably don't understand theirs. Glad I have plenty of friends and family who understand and support me. And I love doing what makes me happy. |
| 2013-05-27 9:41 PM in reply to: dbrook1 |
| Canyon, Texas | Subject: RE: Very negative response Sorry to hear. I had some friends and family that were a little skeptical... their attitudes changed after I finished that first marathon. Now, all negativity is promptly rebutted with a running challenge... now swiming and cycling as well: I even let them pick! Put-up trumps shut-up every day and twice on Sundays. But yes, I agree with most of the respondants... I won't bring up training or races to anyone unless they ask; the conversation turns chinese fairly quickly for the layman. If someone overhears that I like to run, I usually get asked to sign up for a Tough Mudder or some other rediculously themed 'fun' run. I don't do mud runs, I do sweat runs. Endurance athletes are just wired different. |
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