*drama* Family Fighting is killing my training mojo (Page 3)

Amen to that. I honestly hope the responses here haven't scared the OP off.

Here's the deal. YES, you probably have some things that need dealing with. Family shouldn't be a chore, or a thing you resent, and that's probably where you need to start. Communicate with your husband - TELL HIM you're feeling this way and why. Try to work it out before it becomes a fight.

I have two kids and I love the heck out of being a mom, but let's be honest - there are moments when being a mom is HARD. My second kid was colicky, and spent hours crying every day while I juggled trying to soothe him while trying to be a good interactive mom to his older sister. Coming from a corporate career and the freedom to train whenever I wanted, suddenly switching to a situation where I couldn't make things better (poor kid - I just wanted him to feel better!) was really difficult. I had a LOT of bad days. I gained weight. I stopped training. I resented my family at times, mostly because I was sleep-deprived and feeling awful for my kid.

To all the guys here who are all roses and sunshine, I think it's great that you're obviously fantastic dads (because I know you are, and I love that!), but admitting difficulty does not a bad parent make.

I accept 100% responsibility for my kids. They are the most rewarding thing I have done in my life. I am committed to doing what is best for them all the time. But all of that comes with some sacrifices in my personal life. And quite honestly, there are moments (especially when they are very young) that dealing with that reality is difficult.

In the end, I learned to communicate about it with my husband, and he met me halfway. There were a lot of days when I said, "Honey, it's been really rough day with the kids. I think it would do me a lot of good to go for a bike ride when you get home - is that ok?" And he is an awesome husband and figured out that saying "Sure thing!!" made for a much happier and productive wife and mom. So have that conversation with your husband, and if you can't do it without things escalating, do it in the presence of a therapist.

We're at a point now where I tell him in January what races I'm thinking of doing, what the time commitment is per week and each weekend, and we discuss if it's possible with the family schedule and how we can work it out. I'm choosing to skip a 50 mile mountain bike race this summer because I couldn't figure out where to fit in 6 hr training rides, and I respect that it would affect time with the family. We're compromising so I can do some 30 mile races (3-4 hr training rides).

I don't know how old your kids are or if you work full-time or if training for long distance triathlons fits into your schedule. That's all for you and your husband (and NOT your MIL) to figure out. But make sure it's a conversation. Not just resentment boiling over on both sides due to things never said until it turns into a fight.

*Hugs*

I know it's hard.

Well.....fair enough......I defer to the moms. 

rizztalah - in order to show good faith in my responses I am willing to trade identical twin 14 year old girls for one of your children who is aggravating you the most.  I can send clothing, some food (they eat more in a day than I can ship), and at least one boyfriend that I would like to hang (yes, you can save a life).  If you have one, I would prefer a child under 10.  I may be willing to trade back when the twins are 18, but you will have to show proof that they are no longer fighting with each other, crying over every little thing, yelling demands, or hating their parents.

PM me for shipping information.

I have one of those.....but he's outnumbered by 4....so we mostly lay low.

x2 - Funny! Some levity in the frustration of raising teenagers.

I think one of the tricks of being really happy raising teenagers is being able to recognize those great moments that come from the years you put in raising your kids.  Most of them are small, and probably mean very little in the big picture, but if you can find a way to share in those moments with your kids then it becomes part of the family fabric.  But, you have to be there.....those moments don't come looking for you.  These pics are from a swim meet last night, when my daughter (black cap) and the girl racing next to her realized they swam together when they were 8-9 years old.....and hadn't seen each other since.  The joy on their faces makes some of those "discussions" about going to swim practice (the ones where you really aren't sure why you are putting yourself through it if it is such a pain in the arse) worth their weight in gold.  Neither of them swam a great race, but it's pretty obvious that neither of them cared once they found an "old" friend.  Catch those small moments and life always looks pretty damn good.

(friends.jpg)

(friends2.jpg)

FTFY