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2012-01-30 7:15 PM

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Master
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San Antone, Texas
Subject: Strangest thing to ever happen at your workplace

Mine happened today.  I work in a typical administrative office building on a military installation.  So for the most part, all professional people who wear a suit/tie/uniform everyday.

So I walk into the men's room around 10 am.  There are two stalls and one urinal in this men's room, and the urinal is the waterless kind.  Needless to say it usually has a pretty bad smell in there because of that fact.

Well today I walk in and the smell was horrendous.  100 times worse than usual!  I plug my nose and say to myself "What the hell is that?" when I look down and see something on the floor, directly in front of the single urinal.  That something was brown and cylinder shaped.  At first I think, "oh that can't be what I think it is."  But  - it - was!  a single log, left there by some disgruntled employee I guess.  On the floor.  In front of the urinal.

The floor wasn't wet, so it wasn't like one of the toilets overflowed and the water went down the drain in the floor.

And it wasn't a pile or anything.  Just one, singular, human turd.  I'm guessing.

Who does this???  In any setting, yet alone a professional military setting.  Who in their right mind takes a dump on the floor??

So as I stand there in horror, two of my buddies happen to come in and see what i'm staring at.  And they flip out, just like I did.

As we stand horrified, another co-worker walks in and surveys the scene.  He then proceeds to take some toilet paper, pick up the turd in it, and flush it down the toilet.  Then takes a whiz in the urinal, washes his hands (thank god) and leaves, like nothing happened as we stand there frozen with our jaws on the floor.

Seriously, I can't believe this happened today.  I don't know if I can ever go in that bathroom again.

Who does that?!?!!



2012-01-30 7:36 PM
in reply to: #4019636

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Payson, AZ
Subject: RE: Strangest thing to ever happen at your workplace
I use to work at a high tech manufacturing plant.  They do all their manufacturing in a clean room.  It is believed that perhaps the clean room can make folks go a bit crazy.  More then once the hazmat team has been called to the bathrooms.  Usually not a single log though.  Usually there is poop all over the place.  I can't even imagine.  
2012-01-30 7:42 PM
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Subject: RE: Strangest thing to ever happen at your workplace
I was a grad student. My advisor was in the lab, made a beaker of cyanide, and drank it. I hope I never experience anything weirder.
2012-01-30 7:43 PM
in reply to: #4019662

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Payson, AZ
Subject: RE: Strangest thing to ever happen at your workplace

BrianRunsPhilly - 2012-01-30 5:42 PM I was a grad student. My advisor was in the lab, made a beaker of cyanide, and drank it. I hope I never experience anything weirder.

WHAT?

2012-01-30 8:00 PM
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Subject: RE: Strangest thing to ever happen at your workplace
Woman had a great Dane as her service dog...this thing took a massive poo right in the floor! Still the only great Dane service dog I've ever seen.
2012-01-30 8:03 PM
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Subject: RE: Strangest thing to ever happen at your workplace
bzgl40 - 2012-01-30 8:43 PM

BrianRunsPhilly - 2012-01-30 5:42 PM I was a grad student. My advisor was in the lab, made a beaker of cyanide, and drank it. I hope I never experience anything weirder.

WHAT?

This is a true story that happened back in 1987. There is obviously a lot more detail, some of it just as weird if not more so, but it made for a pretty freaky few days and weeks.



2012-01-30 9:29 PM
in reply to: #4019655

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Subject: RE: Strangest thing to ever happen at your workplace

bzgl40 - 2012-01-30 8:36 PM I use to work at a high tech manufacturing plant.  They do all their manufacturing in a clean room.  It is believed that perhaps the clean room can make folks go a bit crazy.  More then once the hazmat team has been called to the bathrooms.  Usually not a single log though.  Usually there is poop all over the place.  I can't even imagine.  

Clean room legend of my company  (before I was hired):  male employee and female employee having sex in a clean room.  Both of their spouses were also employees in the same place.  

They were fired for clean room violation.

 

A more recent happening in one of the company's men's room:  

a janitor was caught hiding in the stall taking photos of other men using the urinals with his phone.  Fired on the spot.  

2012-01-30 9:39 PM
in reply to: #4019636

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Puyallup, WA
Subject: RE: Strangest thing to ever happen at your workplace

Where is Mr. Mackey when you need him!!!

2012-01-30 9:45 PM
in reply to: #4019636

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Subject: RE: Strangest thing to ever happen at your workplace
djastroman - 2012-01-30 7:15 PM

Mine happened today.  I work in a typical administrative office building on a military installation.  So for the most part, all professional people who wear a suit/tie/uniform everyday.

So I walk into the men's room around 10 am.  There are two stalls and one urinal in this men's room, and the urinal is the waterless kind.  Needless to say it usually has a pretty bad smell in there because of that fact.

Well today I walk in and the smell was horrendous.  100 times worse than usual!  I plug my nose and say to myself "What the hell is that?" when I look down and see something on the floor, directly in front of the single urinal.  That something was brown and cylinder shaped.  At first I think, "oh that can't be what I think it is."  But  - it - was!  a single log, left there by some disgruntled employee I guess.  On the floor.  In front of the urinal.

The floor wasn't wet, so it wasn't like one of the toilets overflowed and the water went down the drain in the floor.

And it wasn't a pile or anything.  Just one, singular, human turd.  I'm guessing.

Who does this???  In any setting, yet alone a professional military setting.  Who in their right mind takes a dump on the floor??

So as I stand there in horror, two of my buddies happen to come in and see what i'm staring at.  And they flip out, just like I did.

As we stand horrified, another co-worker walks in and surveys the scene.  He then proceeds to take some toilet paper, pick up the turd in it, and flush it down the toilet.  Then takes a whiz in the urinal, washes his hands (thank god) and leaves, like nothing happened as we stand there frozen with our jaws on the floor.

Seriously, I can't believe this happened today.  I don't know if I can ever go in that bathroom again.

Who does that?!?!!

Not sure if you're a southpark fan, but this totally reminded me of this episode: http://www.southparkstudios.com/full-episodes/s10e09-mystery-of-the-urinal-deuce

ps. sry that happened to you..

2012-01-30 9:46 PM
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Subject: RE: Strangest thing to ever happen at your workplace
I found the end of a blunt in my desk drawer where I counseled low income women one afternoon. After that I started locking things when I wasn't at my desk.
2012-01-30 9:52 PM
in reply to: #4019636

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Master
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Lake Norman, NC
Subject: RE: Strangest thing to ever happen at your workplace

It's like I paid you to ask this question!  I've got the FREAKIEST story...

Back in '93 after I had graduated from UNC and Amy and I were living together in Greensboro, NC, I was trying to make ends meet and I took a 2nd job bartending and waiting tables at night at a high-end Italian restaurant called Giovanni's.  I easily made $150-$400 a night there.  Giovanni "John" Carandola was a cranky, crotchety old Italian man who liked to pose tough and create "word" to increase his business.  He talked like a mobster and over-played the part.  To the point where he carried a 9mm handgun in the waistband of his pants in the small of his back.  People thought he was in the Mafia and that maybe he dealt drugs - to the point where he was under surveillance by the FBI for a while.  But I knew better.  He was all talk.  He was terrified of losing his liquor license and was hardly a criminal.

One Saturday night a group of guys who owned a tattoo parlor down West Market St. were living it up.  They had a limo and I was waiting on their table.  They ordered tons of food and Dom Perignon - a good $1,200 tab on the night.  They decided to play a little joke on Giovanni who liked to Shmooze the tables.  (If you were a great waiter and had a great-tipping customer with his/her family, you always kept "bad-mouthed" John AWAY from your table.  The guy had a real sewer mouth.  I tell the guys at my table that it's not a good idea.  "Giovanni's too old and senile.  He doesn't have a sense of humor.  So please don't bother.  It'll be sad, not funny."

But they did it anyway.  "Hey boys.  How's you like-a your f*ckin' meal tonight?  Good, eh?"  Where upon they say everything was horrible and they weren't going to pay him a nickel.  That set John off and he starts yelling at them.  They yell back and a fight insues.  They say they're going out to their limo to get their guns and they're going to come back in and kill him.  As they're walking out the door (all part of the "gag").  "John, NO!"  I yell as I tried to hold him back, but he got to the front door and just as the guys are giggling and nearing the limo, John pulls out that 9mm and empties the entire clip at them.

John's 70, drunk (and has been drunk for the past 50 years) and really doesn't know squat about guns.  As I get my arm over his and pull the gun away, he's fired the last shot.  The tattoo parlor guys scream like little girls, jump into the limo and it races off.  John hasn't hit any of them or even the limo.  He couldn't hit the side of a battleship if he tried to pee on it.  "Ah $hit!  They got me!  They f*ckin' shot me," John says and collapses in my arms.  Sure enough he's been hit twice in the hip and leg.

"What I tell you about this piece of $hit gun of yours John," I tell him.  "Ah $hit!  Doogah-las (how he used to say my name) Take it.  Take it.  I never want to see that thing again.  You go and-a call me an ambulance.  Doogah-las, you no-a leave me."  I check out his wounds.  No artery hit, no hemorrhaging - really not too bad.  I laid him down and put pressure over the wounds waiting for the paramedics to come.

The ambulance comes and as the EMT's check him out they get this puzzled look on their faces and look to me.  "Yeah," I explain.  "He kept it in the small of his back.  Take note of the entry and exit wounds."  One shot went into the top of his right hip and came out the bottom of his butt cheek.  The other just barely into the outside of his thigh under his hip and out above the back of his knee.

The tattoo guys shot him from straight ABOVE?!

I'll let you think about that for a moment...

Go through the motion as if you're pulling a gun from your belt in the back and as you grab it, start pulling the trigger as you raise the gun up your right side and proceed to...

SHOOT YOURSELF TWICE IN THE HIP AND LEG!!!

The funniest part of the story is when they were loading him onto the ambulance, a news crew was there, cameras rolling.  And what does John do?  Pulls the cigarette out of his mouth and shouts out, "Hey!  Giovanni's is-a still open for biz-a-ness!"

Oh and end of story...  The cops brought the terrified tattoo parlor guys back to make a statement.  They actually paid the full bill and gave me a $300 tip.  "I told you John doesn't have a sense of humor."  They didn't press charges and the cops thought it was too damn funny - John shooting himself.  I gave the cops his gun.  "Keep it.  He'll never touch it again and won't miss it.  He probably won't even remember this entire evening."

That place was a riot!



2012-01-30 10:08 PM
in reply to: #4019636

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Atlanta, Georgia
Subject: RE: Strangest thing to ever happen at your workplace
We had an employee death last year due to a safety violation really sad.
Actually, two in the past two years but one was at a plant in another state.  
2012-01-31 7:15 AM
in reply to: #4019636

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Master
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San Antone, Texas
Subject: RE: Strangest thing to ever happen at your workplace

OK, some of those are pretty darn good!  Makes my yesterday not seem so bad.  Lisa, your story is scary!  I've almost had a co-worker die on the job before.  She was (is) 86, and one day when I was walking in from the parking lot after lunch I came across her car with the driver's side door slightly ajar and one leg hanging out.  When I got closer I could she that she was slumped over the steering wheel.  I started to panic and thought to myself "Ruth is dead!"  I shouted "Ruth! Ruth!" and she immediately shot up and said "Whats the matter with you?"

*whew*

2012-01-31 7:26 AM
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Master
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Centennial, CO
Subject: RE: Strangest thing to ever happen at your workplace
We had a person come in for an interview.  Was doing very poorly.  Spilled their cup that they had brought, and low and behold, it was filled with beer.  Ended up spilling all over the table and on the dress of the main hiring manager.  Needless to say he didn't get the job.
2012-01-31 7:29 AM
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Master
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Beijing
Subject: RE: Strangest thing to ever happen at your workplace

A deer crashed through a window of our building and ran bleeding through the place.

Somehow he was corralled through 2 open doors into the garage/shop in the rear of the building... where he remained until the DNR could be summoned to sedate him.

2012-01-31 7:45 AM
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Elite
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Tucson, AZ
Subject: RE: Strangest thing to ever happen at your workplace
We have about 10,000 people at our plantsite, and a dozen or so buildings. Some chick had a baby in the bathroom of my building. I had just been in that bathroom 5 min prior before leaving work to catch a flight, so thankfully I missed the whole thing.


2012-01-31 8:07 AM
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Master
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Lake Norman, NC
Subject: RE: Strangest thing to ever happen at your workplace

velocomp - 2012-01-31 8:26 AM We had a person come in for an interview.  Was doing very poorly.  Spilled their cup that they had brought, and low and behold, it was filled with beer.  Ended up spilling all over the table and on the dress of the main hiring manager.  Needless to say he didn't get the job.

Brings a beer to an interview?!  Now that's some SERIOUS BALLSY-REDNECK!!!  Surprised

 

2012-01-31 8:08 AM
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Elite
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PEI, Canada
Subject: RE: Strangest thing to ever happen at your workplace

We had someone working for our dept that we referred to as "The bandit".  We never found out who the person was but what happened was that on multiple occasions on weekends, someone would go into the men's bathroom and smear poop all over everything!  I'm not talking about a bit of a mess but everywhere!

All the men in the dept ended up getting an email saying that they were installing video cameras at the entrance to the bathroom to try to figure out who it was.  I suspect they knew who it was just didn't have proof - there weren't that many people who worked weekends and everyone had to scan their cards to get in the building.  I'm just glad I was never the one to discover it....

2012-01-31 8:20 AM
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W. Michigan
Subject: RE: Strangest thing to ever happen at your workplace
I worked right out of college for a company that had several manufacturing plants in my area. My first plant was the loud, hot, fiberglass processing plant that no one wanted to work in, so there was a ton of turnover, and the people who were there long term, lets just say didn't have a lot of options.  With the turnover, every spring we'd get a new crop of kids right out of high school that typically would have to start on 3rd shift for a few months.  Occasionally they were attractive 18yr old girls.  We also had a 3rd shift supervisor that was not above hitting on the new help.  My 2nd summer there, he had gotten not 1, not 2, but 3 of the new girls pregant at the same time.  Once that 3rd girl came along, plant mgmt was kinda forced to deal with it.  They installed a camera up in the loft where the service fabric was kept and caught him red-handed with girl # 4, and walked him right out the door. 
2012-01-31 8:41 AM
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Champion
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Dallas, TX
Subject: RE: Strangest thing to ever happen at your workplace
Oh my! WOW! Some people?!!!!

I had a lot of great stories from my old job. A top story was the used condom wrapper we found on the floor of the breakroom. And yes, I did take a picture and post it all over Facebook. Ha!

See, I'm a weirdo about taking pictures for my FB account and posting them. That turd would have been seen by all my friends. Hahahahaa!
2012-01-31 9:45 AM
in reply to: #4019636

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Master
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North Alabama
Subject: RE: Strangest thing to ever happen at your workplace

A couple random events.

#1
We are a corporate office in a nice building. Outside our office in the lobby are the elevators and restrooms. However, we have a single restroom within our office (used to be strictly for the president) which is a male/female use. We do our best to be polite to the others using it.

One day while in there, someone noticed that a fellow employee went through the photo database and printed off our photos from various events. They printed them little larger than wallet size and inserted them throughout the roll of toilet paper. We still don't know who did it, but they printed close to a hundred photos and they included EVERYONE. What's odd, not all of those photos were on our servers so we don't know where they came from. 

Slightly creepy, and comical at the same time. 

#2
On a job site we had one of our backhoe's stolen. We had a portion of roadway closed and the equipment locked up for the night. We got a call from the police saying there had been an accident. Turns out a person who was high as a kite managed to somehow start our backhoe. He proceeded to drive it, but drove it over a small embankment and got stuck. He was arrested wearing nothing but his whitey tighties. We had to bring in another backhoe to rescue the one he wrecked - then do serious hazmat cleanup courtesy of the fuel leak. 



2012-01-31 9:55 AM
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Subject: RE: Strangest thing to ever happen at your workplace
Six people were shot to death.
2012-01-31 10:01 AM
in reply to: #4020495

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Master
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Lake Norman, NC
Subject: RE: Strangest thing to ever happen at your workplace

Left Brain - 2012-01-31 10:55 AM Six people were shot to death.

YIKES!  Surprised  Day-ham!

You aren't per chance in Atlanta?  In that office where the day-trader went postal?

 

2012-01-31 10:08 AM
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Subject: RE: Strangest thing to ever happen at your workplace
Bigfuzzydoug - 2012-01-31 10:01 AM

Left Brain - 2012-01-31 10:55 AM Six people were shot to death.

YIKES!  Surprised  Day-ham!

You aren't per chance in Atlanta?  In that office where the day-trader went postal?

 

 

Naw....unfortunately there is no shortage of those wack jobs.

2012-01-31 10:46 AM
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Champion
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Chicago
Subject: RE: Strangest thing to ever happen at your workplace
In New York we have these giant fish tanks. It appears someone went a little loco and stripped down and went `swimming' with the fishes. I dont think he works here anymore.
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