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2005-06-08 9:55 AM

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Subject: Who's the MOST dispicable?
Read the following story then post who you think is the least and the most dispicable character. Have fun...I can't wait to read more answers. I'll post mine later. Read on:

I just got home from the first day of a workshop called Critical Incidient Stress Management, and part of the training included a discussion about the little story I'm about to share with you. After hearing the story, we had to divide into groups and decide who, of the 5 characters, was the most despicable and who was the least despicable. Our group had a really difficult time coming to consensus, but of the 3 of us 2 were pretty close to being of the same opinion, and I was the farthest, so I sort of gave in, though not really, in my heart. The opinions voiced by the group at large were amazingly diverse. Anyway, I thought it would be fun to toss the story your way and see what you think, so here goes:

Dawn and Tom are in love. Tom happens to live on an island and Dawn wants to surprise him for his birthday and go to the island. Unfortunately she has no boat, so she goes to a marina, finds a captain, and asks him if he could take her to the island on his boat. His price is completely out of Dawn's reach, so he agrees to take her if she will sleep with him. Dawn really really wants to see Tom, so she goes to her friend George to ask his advice as to whether she should take the captain's offer. George refuses to advise her, saying only that she has to make her own decision on something like that. Unable to find the money or any other way to get to the island, Dawn sleeps with the captain and he takes her to surprise Tom.

When she gets there Tom is thrilled until Dawn confesses what she did to make the trip over. In fact, upon hearing her confession he ends their relationship immediately. Dawn is completely crushed, and goes to the local bar to "drown her sorrows." There she meets Ralph, and pours her story and heart out to him. Ralph sympathizes with her plight, and in fact falls instantly in love with Dawn. That same night, he asks her to marry him.

Ok--that's it. Who are the most and least despicable characters in this little story? I hope lots of people weigh in on it! I'll tell you my opinion after you have had a little time to think about yours!


2005-06-08 10:09 AM
in reply to: #170990

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Champion
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Subject: RE: Who's the MOST dispicable?

Oh Crap, I didn't realize I'd be the FIRST post.

  1. Captain (Exploited Dawn)
  2. Tom (Dumped Dawn, when her intentions were good)
  3. Dawn (For being rather lame and stupid)
  4. George (Tried not to get involved)
  5. Ralph (Snapped up Dawn, but seems as if he's going to make an honest woman out of her!)

OMG. I have no idea. Is this one of those tricks where the answer is really... "It's an island! Tom and Dawn couldn't have even known each other if she'd never been there before!" Or something. Are you tricking me? 

??? Whizzzzzzzzzzz

2005-06-08 10:25 AM
in reply to: #170990

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Expert
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Subject: RE: Who's the MOST dispicable?
1. Captian (dirty ol' man)
2. Dawn (could have had a bake sale to get boat fare)
3. George (shoulda said don't do it)
4. Ralph (strange guy.. If he really fell in love with dawn.. then he's number 4. if he's tryin to hit the rebound.. then he moves up and george comes down)
5. Tom

Thats my take on it..

3 and 4 or kindof a toss up i guess... then again.. i guess we could move the less-than-forgiving tom up above ralph also..

by the way.. how did dawn get back off the island????

ws
2005-06-08 10:26 AM
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Subject: RE: Who's the MOST dispicable?
No wrong answers! I promise.
2005-06-08 10:27 AM
in reply to: #170990

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Veteran
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Subject: RE: Who's the MOST dispicable?
Most to least

Captain - people like him give us sailors bad names.

George - for not speaking up giving the ethical response and ponying up the cash

Ralph - for preying on victims

Dawn - for doing it, and not looking for other alternatives

Tom - for not getting it... I mean that Dawns intention was good.

Or like Whizzer is this a joke? Perhaps one of those marriage for money schemes whereby by Tom seduces the girls the captain creates the infielity and the "ralphs" are told to wait in the bar for an emotianally distraught woman. George is the planner and broker.

Edited by Carl Sohn 2005-06-08 10:31 AM
2005-06-08 10:34 AM
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Pro
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Subject: RE: Who's the MOST dispicable?
I haven't read any of the other responses so that they don't change my mind. The Captain is the most despicable. Dirty ol' perv.... Then Dawn, what an idiot! Why didn't she just wait to see him? Then Tom, justifiable, but rather unforgiving. Then Ralph, he sure jumps in head first! Then George, he just wanted to stay out of it.


2005-06-08 10:37 AM
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Subject: RE: Who's the MOST dispicable?

Carl Sohn - 2005-06-08 8:27 AM Captain - people like him give us sailors bad names.

LOL!

2005-06-08 10:49 AM
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Buttercup
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Subject: RE: Who's the MOST dispicable?

Interesting assignment. My opinion:

Dawn. She's a willing victim here. She compromised her reunion with Tom and created a really bad birthday memory for Tom. Breaking a monogamy agreement because you think the reason is good enough is not good enough. She was not at all creative in devising a solution. She allowed her craving for Tom to justify a bad judgment call.

George. We should be able to go to our friends and ask them to help us pull our heads out of our butt. George had the opportunity to rectify Dawn's anial/cranial inversion simply by giving solicited advice and guidance.

Ralph. Fell in love instantly to a ding-bat? WTF? The guy's not right.

Tom. Whatever happened to forgiving our partner when they do stupid things?

The Captain. He asked a price for his services - that's capitalism.

(Footnote: I had a bit of trouble answering this because I don't like the word despicable. I don't think any of these people are worthy of being despised. My answers were more in order of foolishness.)



Edited by Renee 2005-06-08 10:55 AM
2005-06-08 11:10 AM
in reply to: #170990

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Subject: RE: Who's the MOST dispicable?
Ooh, fun and I'm bored at work. I have to agree with Renee..."despicable" is a bit strongly worded for people who all seem to be just really dumb. But. Here goes.

1) Dawn is the top idiot. If the surprise doesn't work out, it doesn't work out...grow up already and plan another surprise. If you compromise your morals that easily, then...well then I don't want anything to do with you, that's for sure.
2) The captain for being sleazy...capitalism it may be, but he could've easily said "pay the cash or get off my boat" instead of "pay the cash or fulfill my pr0n fantasies or get off my boat"
3) George because he's a wuss. A real friend says hard things, including "do NOT go sleep with random sleazy boat captains just because you want something right this very second. He could have all kinds of STDs" Of course, George is a presumably wiling friend of this idiot, so maybe he's not all that bright either....
4) Ralph. Ralph is just an opportunist, and since he heard the whole story and is still willing to marry this girl, well...he can't be all that bright either. But not a bad person...forgive and forget.
5) Tom. He had every reason to dump this bimbo and is probably better off.

Woot. Now I feel all warm and fuzzy and judgmental! Time to go for a run.

(Note: my REAL instinct is to say Dawn is an idiot, the captain is sleazy, and the rest are just along for the ride and shouldn't be ranked...but that's not part of the game)
2005-06-08 11:34 AM
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Elite
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Subject: RE: Who's the MOST dispicable?
1. The Captain
2. Dawn
3. Tom
4. Ralph
5. George
I think Ralph and George should be tied for 4th.
I'm pretty sure Dawn could have found another way there...if she wanted to.
Ralph is a fool but if he is in love, whatever
George is smart to stay out of it

Kim That's funny. I didn't read any of the responses and we answered the same...weird

Edited by madcow 2005-06-08 11:38 AM
2005-06-08 1:00 PM
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Subject: RE: Who's the MOST dispicable?
1. Captain
2. Dawn
3. Tom
4. George
5. Ralph

Jen


2005-06-08 1:06 PM
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Master
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Subject: RE: Who's the MOST dispicable?

It all comes down to one simple question..........  Was Dawn hot???

I am kidding people!!!.

2005-06-08 1:09 PM
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COURT JESTER
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Subject: RE: Who's the MOST dispicable?

Least Dispicable:  George - Wouldn't put himself in the middle of a crap storm

Most Dispicable:  Captian - For making that propostion to Dawn.

2005-06-08 4:36 PM
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Elite
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Subject: RE: Who's the MOST dispicable?
OK Line,
What was your answer and what did the group say?
2005-06-08 6:12 PM
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Elite
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Subject: RE: Who's the MOST dispicable?
1. Dawn - throws away her commitment to fidelity with Tom with hardly a second thought.
2. Captain - he's kinda slimy for asking for what essentially is prostitution. (fee for service.)
3. George - what kind of friend is he? Obviously, not a very good one. Take a stand already!
4. Ralph - Kind of a dork but ok, whatever.
5. Tom - yeah, I'm with Tom. If I had a boyfriend and he confessed something like Dawn did, he would be SO gone.

I've done this story before, but it was a little different. In my story, Ralph didn't exist and Tom was putting pressure on Dawn to get over there no matter what. (He came off as kind of an emotional abuser.) When we did this, we broke up into groups depending on who you thought was the worst person and then your group had to try and change the mind of the other groups.

Edited by cadreamer 2005-06-08 6:12 PM
2005-06-08 6:36 PM
in reply to: #170990

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Elite
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Subject: RE: Who's the MOST dispicable?

1. George- for being a big wuss and not stepping up to help a friend when she came to him for help

2. The Captain- for thinking life imitates bad porn

3. Tom- for not being big enough to forgive somebody he supposedly loves for making a mistake

4. Dawn- for not coming up with a better solution to her problem, and being extremely naiive

5. Ralph- what can you do? There's one born every minute....proposing to a girl you just met in a bar. Desperate, stoopid, needy, emotinally weak and insecure, but not necesarily dispicable.



Edited by RGRBILL 2005-06-08 6:38 PM


2005-06-08 6:37 PM
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Subject: RE: Who's the MOST dispicable?
Okay, here it goes, my order is slightly different than those above:

1. George - if he was her friend, he would have either given/loaned her the money for the trip or advised her not to do it. A true friend would help a friend make such an emotional decision.
2. Tom - Does not appreciate what Dawn did for him, she loved him so much she was willing to pay any price to see him.
3. Dawn - she did not have to go, she could have waited until Tom came or sent him a letter. However, in light of not having money, she did what she though best, her strong emotions for Tom led her to make an irrational decision without thinking it through to the end result.
4. Captain - he didn't trick Dawn into sleeping with him, he laid out his terms fair and square, it was her decision to accept or decline it.
5. Ralph - can't fault a guy for being deparate, he probably asked every girl who had a drink with him to marry him.
2005-06-08 7:29 PM
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Subject: RE: Who's the MOST dispicable?
Thanks for posting, everyone! My mom did this exercise at a class on post-traumatic stress. She said it was intended to give us insight into how we jump to conclusions. Well, I gotta get my exercise somehow.

I tabulated the results in two different ways, and one was slightly more compllicated. The first time I just counted who got the most votes for first, second, third, etc. Here's those:

1 (Most despicable): Captain
2: Dawn
3: Tom
4: Ralph
5: George

The second time, I assinged points per placement. For example if you got voted number one three times, you got three points. If you got voted second three times, you got six points. Understand? The results were slightly different:

1. Captain
2. Dawn
3. George
4. Tom
5. Ralph

As for my own personal preference which was NOT counted into the final score, mostly because I forgot. But I'd say that definitely Dawn's friend George is the LEAST dispicable. He allowed her the freedom to make her own choices, without inserting his own bias. I think that's a great trait in a friend, though sometimes it's good to hear what you want to hear.

Now, for the rest of them, in order of LEAST dispicable to MOST dispicable, and a brief run down as to why:

Tom: Ending a relationship because your partner slept with someone is not wrong, nor is it bad or cruel. Hwoever, given the circumstances, maybe they could have worked it out. It's not like she slept with the captain out of lust or drunkenness.She was just broke.

Ralph: What a creep to ask Dawn to marry him on the spot like that! But other than being emotionally unstable, he seemed pretty harmless.

The Captain: Yes, he did ask Dawn to sleep with him, but there are lots of scumbags out there. He COULD have raped her, or just plain stolen her money.

Most dispicable: Dawn: Though there were lots of dispicable people with dispicable actions around her, in the end the crux of the issue was HER decision. If she hadn't slept with the captain, thenTom wouldn't have broken up with her and Ralph wouldn't have asked her to marry him. And maybe she would have been able to find an alternate route to the island if she had been patient and no so set on instant gratification, no matter how thoughtful she thought she was being,

So that's my opinion. Of course, this coming from a newlywed and I think adultery in any form is a cardinal sin.

Anyway, thanks everyone, for playing!
2005-06-08 9:02 PM
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Champion
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Subject: RE: Who's the MOST dispicable?
Some of the behavior here was sleazy, some was pathetic and some was just plain stupid. I can't rate the people on how much I despise them but I will rate  them based on how much their behavior makes me glad I don't have to deal with them on a daily basis, like an in-law who lives next door:

Dawn: This was about what she wanted, not what her boyfriend wanted. She did a stupid thing for a really stupid reason and hurt someone who at least professed to care for her. Her behaviour was selfish, dangerous and short sighted. She then goes to a bar by herself to get drunk and find sympathy.

Ralph: A pretty pathetic evening for this one. Fall in love with a woman with a sob story immediately after meeting her in a bar and ask her to marry you? Bonehead defined.

The captain: yeah there's one born every minute, and he just wanted some form of payment for the trip, but he had no idea if what kind of temperment or firearms the boyfriend possessed. Stupid decision. I'm a big believer in the power of capitalism, but without a moral basis it can do more harm than good.

George: not enough info. He could have advised her, or at least given her ideas on how to raise the money. Then again, he could have been wise to her and just wanted her to go away.

Tom: he did the right thing. He saw Dawn as being major trouble and gave her the boot.
2005-06-09 7:55 AM
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Subject: RE: Who's the MOST dispicable?

1. Dawn: No excuse for cheating
2. George: Friends should help each other
3. Captain: SLimeball
4. Tom: Should have been more considerate instead of living on an island where Dawn can't get to him
5, Ralph: pathetic, but not despicable.
2005-06-09 8:34 AM
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Subject: RE: Who's the MOST dispicable?
Intresting excercise! 1. Dawn2. George3. Ralph4. Captain5. Tom


2005-06-09 11:48 AM
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Elite
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Subject: RE: Who's the MOST dispicable?
Dang, when I took CISM (many moons ago) we had scenarios with burning bldgs and mass casualities. But anyway heres the deal
The Captain made out
Dawn's a slut
Everyone else is a pathetic loser.
OK only kidding.
2005-06-12 8:38 AM
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Champion
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Ottawa, Ontario
Subject: RE: Who's the MOST dispicable?

Most despicable to least:

1. Dawn - for doing something wrong to achieve something right ... and for being utterly stupid

2. Ralph - he takes advantage of the situation by marrying her ... she was weak at the time 

3.  George - could have told her not to do it and should have offered to lend her the money

4. Tom - a dork but still, she did cheat on him even if it was for a good reason

5. Captain - set a price for his services and was willing to barter

2005-06-12 10:50 AM
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Elite
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Subject: RE: Who's the MOST dispicable?

Some food for thought:

  1. Dawn: can she really be the worst...with the US Divorce rate > 50% and Clinton, Roosevelt, Lincoln, Jessie Jackson and other "leaders" not fulfilling their monogamous relationships.  Sounds like she's well on her way to becoming a "leader" that US citizens look to for guidance.  (By the way, nice job Jessie Jackson on having an illegitimate child while being Clinton's spiritual advisor....what a freggin' moron)
    .
  2. Captain: can he really be the worst...because the only thing that separates prostitution from pornography is a video camera.  Maybe he should have video taped it, he would have made a bunch more cash AND it wouldn't have been illegal !
    .
  3. George:  can he really be the worst...because like was previously stated, he allowed her to make her own judgement call and if Dawn can't make the "correct" judgement call without being "helped" she doesn't deserve to be in a monogamous relationship in the first place.
    .
  4. Ralph:  Can he really be the worst...because he simply asked a question?  That's a far stretch.
    .
  5. Tom:  Can he really be the worst...it seems to me like he is the only sensible one.  He did exactly what should be done.  That is, to distance yourself from people like Dawn.

My personal opinion on the order is that Dawn is the worst and Tom did absolutely nothing dispicable.

Sorry I didn't play by the rules, but I usually don't. 



Edited by Steve- 2005-06-12 10:51 AM

2005-06-15 1:44 PM
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Supersonicus Idioticus
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Subject: RE: Who's the MOST dispicable?
1. Captain
2. George - don't stay silent. Everything could have been avoided if he had some balls to stand up for what's right.
3. Dawn 4. Tom 5. Ralph
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